“You can’t do everything and do everything well.” I was sitting at a piano, confiding in my piano teacher as I often did, when she doled out this piece of advice that has stuck with me ever since. At 16-years-old, … Continue reading
I feel like I’m in a period of transition, which is not unusual for me. It’s really not unusual for anyone like me, and by that I mean a woman in her 30s This year, I will be turning 36, … Continue reading
I’m writing this late at night on purpose. Or maybe I’m not. I don’t know. Right now I’m in Widow Time Zone (WTZ). WTZ comes as a surprise to us all. I know this because I’ll be sitting at … Continue reading
I have been confused by many things in my life. But I would say that, by far, the thing that has confused me the most is being comforted by a boyfriend while I cry about my husband. Yup. That’s a … Continue reading
Just like everyone else in the world, I have good weeks and I have bad ones. This one…not so great: Sick kid, two trips to the ER, fear of going to my mailbox to find the medical bills that I … Continue reading
“I don’t feel good,” I said to my sister. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me or why…but I don’t.” The moment the words left my mouth, I had a revelation. I say the same thing, the same thing, every … Continue reading
I was at the mall alone, returning a few things from the holidays, looking at clothes that the “experts” say are in style (did anyone really perfect the poncho look?), and generally just enjoying shopping without having to worry about … Continue reading
I read something recently that I wanted to share with you that I think articulates part of the miracle…yes, I did say miracle…of loss. Not the loss itself, of course…but what our (dare I say) rebirth when it happens. Mark … Continue reading
Throughout the last few years, I have thought a lot about how we all handle widowhood differently. We all move at our own pace and grieve within our own comfort zone. It’s been interesting to me the way I’ve grieved. … Continue reading
You know…I always hesitate before I write about something hard I’m going through. There is always a fear that a new widow will read it and think, “My gosh…I’m just trying to get through today. This woman has been at … Continue reading
Do you ever think that the networks are missing out on the ultimate reality series? What has more drama, sick humor, running mascara, and (sometimes) hair-pulling than widowhood? When I think of the millions that could have been made on … Continue reading
I’ve been thinking a lot about friendships lately and how they change and I know that’s also on the minds of many of my widow(er) friends out there. I guess it’s that time of year…when friends and family seem to … Continue reading
I recently experienced a personal milestone that may not seem like much to the outside world. But it’s something that I know other widows who are trying to navigate this road will understand. I went to a doctor’s appointment with … Continue reading
Don’t judge me when I say this … but I could easily get addicted to pedicures. Now, for you men who are reading this, this is not just a girl thing. Any guy who has had a pedicure before will … Continue reading
Is it just me…or does it seem like the world is going to heck in a hand-basket? Earthquakes, nuclear explosions, tsunamis, idiots in government. I hear even that sweet, young man, Charlie Sheen, is having issues. Everything that is going … Continue reading
“A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are.” –Unknown My friend’s husband recently passed away after a long battle with cancer. But as we all know…it doesn’t matter … Continue reading
I don’t take a whole lot of pictures anymore. This wasn’t a conscious decision, but it is a big change from the person I used to be. In my early days as a mother, I was a huuuuge scrapbooker. I did … Continue reading
I’m in a funk. I know, I know…everyone is going to say that I shouldn’t be surprised, that it happens to everyone after the holidays. But it’s surprising me. I’m not quite sure why I’m experiencing this post-holiday let down. … Continue reading
I know I’m not the only one who is feeling the effects of the season. Grieving during “normal” times is a full-time job. Throw in 2 or 3 holidays back to back and whatever milestones we might have in the … Continue reading
The mood has changed. Not just my mood (although that can change every second, thanks to fluctuating hormone levels and no husband to yell at when I’m cranky for no reason). It seems like everyone’s mood has changed. You know…we’re … Continue reading
I had a pretty good day recently. Which is shocking because I’ve starting in on my Christmas shopping. I think what made it okay was that first of all, I got to spend some time with my mom. The other … Continue reading
I was brought up with a Southern mother who drummed into us the lesson that it doesn’t matter if someone gives you a diamond or a dandelion…thank you notes are a must. And for the most part, I completely agree. … Continue reading
We all go through different stages in our lives. And all of those stages affect us differently. And how we deal with those stages shape the people we become. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about when my husband and … Continue reading
I always thought that going through a profound loss would make someone an expert on loss. I mean, we always work with what we know, right? You would think after experiencing the death of my husband that I would be … Continue reading
Let’s face it. We start spending the moment our loved one take his last breath. Wait a minute–we really start spending way before that. Most of us are the reason why our own personal physicians drive such nice cars. But … Continue reading