Loss of a Family Member

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Articles

  • Bereaved Military Family Members and Veterans Invited to Participate in Grief Study

    Posted on April 7, 2019 - by admin

    Guest Column by Stephen J. Cozza, M.D Memorial Day is coming and our nation will pause to honor the service and sacrifice of our fallen military service members. Deaths in the decade after September 11, 2001 largely resulted from sudden and violent causes, including combat, accidents, and suicide. Even during peacetime, deaths in the military can often come unexpectedly and suddenly, taking young people in the prime of their lives. Those who grieve such losses shoulder a heavy burden. While most people can and do integrate loss into their lives and find joy again, some continue to suffer for years […]

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  • Zaneta Gileno: TAPS Helps After Military Deaths

    Posted on October 6, 2018 - by Jessica Tyner Mehta

    Zaneta Gileno works for the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS), a non-profit that supports people who lost loved ones in the military. As the Director of Community-Based care, Gileno helps connect people to individualized grief counseling. She spoke with Dr. Heidi Horsley during the 2015 Association for Death Education and Counseling conference about her work and personal experience with TAPS. Peer support is what Gileno believes most helps children who lose a parent in the military, as Gileno lost her own father at a young age. Dr. Horsley also utilizes the services of TAPS, and knows first-hand just how […]

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  • Carole Hilton: TAPS for Widows

    Posted on October 3, 2018 - by Heidi Horsley

    The Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS) was a buoy for Carole Hilton, who discovered the program just a few days after her husband died. He was an active member in the Navy, and when the officer arrived at Hilton’s doorstep to deliver the news, within the paperwork was a TAPS brochure. Hilton talked with the Open to Hope Executive Director, Dr. Heidi Horsley, during the 2015 Association for Death Education and Counseling conference about what TAPS means to her. Nobody plans on becoming a young widow or ever having that title bestowed upon them. However, Hilton says that simply […]

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  • Hospice and Healing: Interview with Anne Baker

    Posted on September 18, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

    At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Anne Baker about healing and helping through hospice. Anne’s losses started early, when she was just 7 years old her mother died suddenly. Just three years later, Anne’s little sister died. At that point in Anne’s life, there was no outlet for her to share her loss with others who have gone through the same thing. After two significant losses in her life, Anne went on to become a volunteer for Hospice Caring, which is a non-medical, volunteer-based hospice in Montgomery, Maryland. Anne is now one of […]

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  • Critical Care Family and Staff Support: Interview with Sue Gammill

    Posted on September 15, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

    At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Sue Gammill about her work with families of patients being a liaison between physicians and families. Sue has always believed that how we handle death in health care is important to the survivors. Sue works in the pediatric intensive care unit in Atlanta, Georgia and she believe they could be doing a better job. So what Sue did was write a proposal that she called “My Dream Job”. Sue explains more about the role she created for herself in the video below. Here are some key takeaways […]

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  • Expressive Arts to Heal from Grief: Interview with Brianne Overton

    Posted on September 11, 2018 - by Heidi Horsley

    At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Brianne Overton about using the healing arts to help people cope with grief. In the video below, Brianne discusses healing/expressive arts and how they can help you get through the grieving process. Here are some key takeaways from the video: Drawing, writing, poetry, storyboards, and music can all be used as healing arts. Anything that allows you to express yourself creatively. When it comes to storyboards, you start off with just a blank piece of paper folded into 4’s or 6’s. From there, draw a picture in one […]

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  • Continuing Bonds After The Loss Of A Parent: Interview with Brittany Trauthwein

    Posted on September 8, 2018 - by Heidi Horsley

    At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Brittany Trauthwein about continuing bonds after loss. Brittany is a doctorate student at the Chicago Professional School of Psychology who is writing a dissertation about continuing bonds after the death of a parent. In the video below, Brittany discusses how she got into this topic and why it was so important for her to write about it as her dissertation. Here are some key takeaways from the video: During the first year of her schooling, Brittany lost her father. That was when people started telling her stories […]

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  • grief candles

    Acute Anticipatory Grief: What a Surprise!

    Posted on May 24, 2018 - by Harriet Hodgson

    Anticipatory grief isn’t new to me. I’ve studied it for years, written articles about it, and co-authored a book about it. That’s why I was surprised when I burst into tears sparked by anticipatory grief. The attack, if it can be called that, happened just before surgery. For three months I experienced odd symptoms. Because I’m my disabled husband’s caregiver, I paid no attention to the symptoms until they couldn’t be ignored. Fortunately, I was able to get an appointment with my doctor and undergo tests. The question: Did I have uterine cancer? The question alone was enough to cause anticipatory […]

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  • Facing Mortality: Interview with Isabel Stenzel Byrnes

    Posted on January 8, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

    At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Isabel Stenzel Byrnes about living with an illness and learning how to find hope and find a balance. Isabel was born with cystic fibrosis, and she says that her friends with the illness gave her the support and skills needed to live with her disease. However, that support came at a cost for Isabel, as almost every year she lost at least one or two friends to cystic fibrosis. She explains that she got to witness how she would eventually die from her disease, but also become […]

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  • Waiting for God to Respond to a Prayer

    Posted on December 22, 2017 - by Charles W. Sidoti

    There is a classic psychological question you may be familiar with that is related to our ability to wait on God:  “If a tree falls in the forest and there is no one there to hear it, does it still make a sound?” When we pray the words of the Serenity Prayer, “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference,” we present God with three requests.   1) The first request is for the ability to accept the things that we cannot change. Here […]

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  • Why Some Families are Resilient

    Posted on December 20, 2017 - by Gloria Horsley

    Kathleen Gilbert is based at Indiana University and specializes in grief counseling with military members and their families—however, she also works to help families build resiliency during deployment (without any deaths occurring). Gilbert spoke to Dr. Gloria Horsley during the 2015 Association on Death Education and Counseling conference about what she’s working on and how grief in military families is a niche. Members of the Indiana National Guard were Gilbert’s first clients, and she operated a camp to help with healing, processing and grieving. In all cases (so far), it has been fathers who were deployed. For the most part […]

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  • 911 Memorial

    September 11th – 16 Years of Grief

    Posted on September 11, 2017 - by Heidi Horsley

    Sixteen years ago, our resilience as a country was tested when nearly 3,000 people were killed in the Sept. 11th terrorist attacks.  We have come a long way since then, and I have watched as NYC has rebuilt, and bereaved families have once again found hope. I was honored to spend ten years with 9/11 firefighter families, taking the grief journey with them.  Their grief came in waves, often knocking them down when they least expected it.  But these families kept going, and they leaned on, and supported other 9/11 families, much as TAPS families do.  It’s been 16 years, […]

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  • Coping With the Next Loss Differently: Interview with Dr. William Buckley

    Posted on August 28, 2017 - by Gloria Horsley

    At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Dr. William (Bill) Buckley about how people can cope with a loss in a different manner if they do not feel like they coped well with a previous loss. Many families have already gone through a loss, and with that loss they carry a range of bad feelings about the experience they went through. In anticipation of future losses, Bill explains that families want to know how they can do better. Hear his advice in the video below. Here are some key takeaways from the video: Many […]

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  • 10th Anniversary: Tears at Home Depot

    Posted on February 14, 2017 - by Harriet Hodgson

    The 10th anniversary of my daughter’s death is a few days away. I thought I was prepared for this anniversary, but I wasn’t. Instead, I have burst into tears several times. My daughter, mother of my twin grandchildren, died from the injuries she received in a car crash. Six months later he twins’ father died from the injuries he received in another crash. The court appointed my husband and me as the twins’ guardians. A few days before the anniversary of their mother’s death, the twins were going to celebrate their 25th birthdays, and receive their mother’s legacy. To mark the […]

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  • At Thanksgiving, Say Their Names

    Posted on November 25, 2016 - by Tom Zuba

    This article was first published on Open to Hope in 2010. Thursday will be the 21st Thanksgiving I’ve lived through following the death of my 18-month-old daughter Erin in 1990.  The 12th since my wife Trici died in 1999 and the 6th since my 13-year-old son Rory died in 2005. One thing I know for sure is that I can’t expect anyone to mention the name(s) of the people I love who have died.  Expecting someone to say their names only brings me disappointment and pain because there is a good chance that the day will pass with no one […]

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  • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder in the Military

    Posted on May 31, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

    Dr. Heidi Horsley talks about military post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) with Dr. Ed Tick, an expert in the field. He’s the author of “War and the Soul” as well as four other books. He’s the director of Soldier’s Heart and has worked with military members and their families for several years. There’s a difference between military PTSD and “regular” PTSD. Trauma from military PTSD is impacted by traumatic accidents, illnesses, and deaths, but also involves being an agent of death and destruction. Veterans are asking for help feeling forced to be perpetrators. Training military members means training killers, and […]

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  • Stephanie Groepper: Spouse Loss

    Posted on February 29, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

    Losing a spouse is unexpected, since you see yourself growing old with this person. Dr. Heidi Horsley talks to Stephanie Groepper, a military widow. She’s a psychology student and the founder of Washington Warrior Widows, a non-profit for widows and widowers in Washington State. Groepper’s daughter is seven years old, and was only four months old when her partner died. In the military, it’s the loss of both a spouse and a lifestyle. As part of the military, it can be a sudden loss of your community. You’re given one year to move off base if you live in military […]

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  • Diana Wright: TAPS Youth Programs

    Posted on February 13, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

    The recent National Alliance for Grieving Children conference brought together Dr. Heidi Horsley and Diana Wright of TAPS Youth Programs. She’s been a volunteer for five years, and came on staff as a programs coordinator. She first learned about TAPS in 2007, and learned how incredible the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors is for bereaved military members and their families. She started volunteering and found a path of healing after her son died in the military. It took six months after his death before she started actively looking for grief support. Both of Wright’s children have died, and this has […]

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    Darcey Fairchild: Nature-Based Grief Programs for Teens

    Posted on November 20, 2015 - by Heidi Horsley

    At the conference for the National Alliance for Grieving Children, Dr. Heidi Horsley talked with Darcey Fairchild who works with TAPS, an organization which serves military families. She began her work just over two years ago in Montana. It was a means of incorporating her love for nature-based programming and her background in social work. Nature based programming can be very helpful for children in grief. As a native Montanan, Fairchild found peace in the natural world and uses it as a way to regulate her emotions. There’s something incredible about spending the day in front of a mountain or […]

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    Episode 158: Giving Voice to Grief and Recovery

    Posted on February 5, 2019 - by admin

    On this show Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley explore how film gives voice to grief and recovery. Guests include bereaved siblings Kathy and Arnie Sparnins, Executive Producers of Voices of Grief: Honoring the Sacred Journey.

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    Episode 152: Needs of People Coping with Mass Violence, Trauma and Military Loss

    Posted on December 10, 2018 - by admin

    On This show Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley interview Sallie Lynch Development Consultant for Tuesday’s Children, which works with 9/11 families, military families and communities impacted by traumatic loss, and Amy Tucci CEO of Hospice Foundation of America and the executive director of the TAPS Institute for Hope and Healing® regarding providing grief resources for survivors of military loss, regardless of the manner of death, and continuing education about loss for professionals who care for the loved ones of America’s fallen heroes.

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    Episode 128: Coping with the High Profile Death of a Child

    Posted on April 10, 2018 - by admin

    On this show Dr. Gloria Horsley and Dr. Heidi Horsley will interview Jamie Bright and Delain Johnson, about coping with the high profile death of a child, and how they coped. Danielle was murdered by her boyfriend.  Delain is Vice President of Bereaved Parents USA, and a licensed counselor, specializing in grief and loss. Her son, Christopher, an army captain, was killed in action during Operation Iraqi Freedom. A video clip is show of Bereaved Parents USA.

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    Episode 103: TAPS-Supporting Military Families

    Posted on May 11, 2017 - by admin

    On this show Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley interview Zaneta M. Gileno, LMSW, CT Director, Community Based Care and Professional Education and Emily Munoz, surviving spouse of Gil and director of the TAPs Inner Warrior Health and Wellness program regarding programs for those who have lost a loved one in the military.

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    Episode 101- Amy Cooper and Tom Tomasello: Will I Ever Sing Again?

    Posted on March 27, 2017 - by admin

    Will I ever smile or sing again? On this show Drs’ Gloria and Heidi Horsley and Alan Pedersen, Executive Director of The Compassionate Friends, explore with bereaved parents; Amy Cooper, singer, songwriter and musician Tom Tomasello the struggle to find their creative process after the deaths of their sons’, Jon and Rory.  Amy sings while Tom accompanies her on keyboard.

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    Episode 87: Dealing With Grief Through Art with Nancy Gershman and Debla E. Heredia-Brown

    Posted on October 23, 2016 - by admin

    Are you looking for a unique way to memorialize or celebrate the life of your loved one? Then join Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley in an interview with memory artist Nancy Gershman and her client Debla Hargreaves for whom Nancy created a dream scape in memory of her father. Documentary film maker Kate Rolston then joins the show discussing how her upcoming film A New Dawn has transformed her thoughts about widowhood. A clip is shown of her most recent documentary Real Moms.

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    Episode 84: Military Loss with Jeanne Harris Weaver and Donn Weaver

    Posted on September 25, 2016 - by admin

    On this show Dr. Gloria Horsley and Dr. Heidi Horsley interviewed artist Jeanne Harris Weaver and her husband, Donn Weaver, a retired Foreign Service Diplomat.  Their son, Todd, an Army Ranger, was killed while on deployment in Afghanistan.  In his memory, Jeanne created twenty-one pictures in the year following Todd’s death.  A tribute clip is shown honoring Bonnie Carroll, founder of TAPS, Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors.

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    Episode 80: Organ Donation with Kayla Smith, Judy Armijo and Kevin Robinson

    Posted on July 27, 2016 - by admin

    On this show Dr’s Gloria and Heidi Horsley interview Kayla Smith, family services coordinator for Live On New York, regarding her work with organ donor families. Judy Armijo, bereaved mother of Alexandra, and organ recipient Kevin Robinson join the group to discuss the impact of Alexandra’s decision to become a registered organ donor.  Alexandra died tragically in a drowning accident. A clip is shown regarding LiveOnNY and organ donation. Alan Petersen, Executive Director of The Compassionate Friends, closes the show by singing Love Lives On.  Words and lyrics by Alan Pedersen.

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    Episode 68: Grief Quest/ Music and Healing

    Posted on April 26, 2016 - by admin

    On this show Dr. Gloria Horsley and Dr. Heidi Horsley discuss with Lilly Juliian bereaved parent/spouse and founder of COPE and her partner Jerry Winestock bereaved spouse about their book Grief Quest and their retreats and camps that have inspired thousands of individuals and families to find hope and healing. Jerry is also the author of Joy Ride. Dr’s Gloria and Heidi and then joined by Music therapist Stefan Benkowski. Stefan talks about the healing power of music and closes the show singing Morning Has Broken.

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    Episode 62: Laughter and Yoga For Health

    Posted on December 14, 2015 - by admin

    On this show Dr. Gloria Horsley and Alan Pedersen, Executive Director of The Compassionate Friends, interview Linda Shively, co-leader of the Santa Clara County, California chapter of The Compassionate Friends and parent of Jessica, on how laughter has helped her and others deal with their losses. The second guest is Rebecca Bara, owner of Vibe Yoga in Redwood City, California and bereaved sibling of Scott. Rebecca is the daughter of Dr. Gloria. Rebecca with the assistance of Grace Law demonstrates 8 physical yoga poses that calm the body, decrease stress, quiet the mind and sooth the spirit. Alan closes the […]

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    Episode 60: Traumatic Sibling Loss: Finding Hope Again

    Posted on December 14, 2015 - by admin

    On this show Dr. Gloria Horsley and co-host Alan Pedersen, Executive Director of The Compassionate Friends, interview two guests regarding coping with grief after a traumatic sibling loss. The first guest is Megan MacFarland, sister of Staff Sgt.Marc Small, who was killed in Afghanistan in 2009. The second guest is Zander Sprague, whose sister was murdered in 1996. Zander is the author of Making Lemonade: Choosing a Positive Pathway After Losing a Sibling. Inspired by their loses both Megan and Zander have gone on to develop careers helping others. Zander by getting a degree in counseling and Megan in occupational […]

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