Public figures such as Elizabeth Edwards and Princess Diana can help the rest of us feel our emotions and feelings.

I noticed when John Lennon died on the streets of NYC that my clients were deeply affected by his death. That is when I began to use the dramatic events in public figures’ lives as a way to help my clients feel their own emotions and feelings.

Try it yourself. Pay attention to how you are affected by Elizabeth Edwards’ death. No matter what you feel, allow yourself to fully experience it. Always remember, with feelings and emotions, there is no right or wrong. Emotions are not good or bad. Whatever you feel is what you feel.

Writing is a great way to get in touch with what you feel about anything. Psychological research shows that if you write about your feelings and emotions for 15-20 minutes a day, for 4 days in a row, you will feel better.

So get out your paper and pen or start a new file on your computer, “What I Feel About Death.” Or, “What I Feel About Elizabeth Edwards’ Death.” Or simply, “How I Feel.”

If you have also loss a loved one this year and have not fully grieved, Elizabeth’s death can be a special holiday gift for you. Her death can trigger your grief and help you express your pain, sorrow and hurt. Or if you have been grieving your loss, her death can help you continue along your natural process of grieving.

It is always helpful to remember that grieving is a process, not a one-time event. My grief of losing my dad this year goes in waves, up and down. If you let yourself ride your grief wave, you will feel bad for a while, and then you will feel more alive.

So allow yourself to feel and write about your own personal loss and the way you feel about Edwards’ death. Take her gift, open it and fully use it.

Doris Jeanette, Psy.D, is a licensed psychologist with 34 years of experience helping people express their feelings and emotions in healthy, empowering ways. Her emotional health guide, “Opening the Heart,” was highly recommended by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, MD. Sign up for Dr. Jeanette’s free holistic psychology newsletter and order, “Opening the Heart” at: http://www.drjeanette.com/lossaudio.html