Prayer for Peace If there is to be peace in the world, There must be peace in the nations. If there is to be peace in the nations, There must be peace in the cities. If there is to be peace in the cities, There must be peace between neighbors. If there is to be [...]
Found 25 results
The Gift of the Blanket
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December 25, 2011
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When my son was born, over thirty three years ago, I received a beautiful handmade blanket for him. I remember the day I received the blanket. My sister, Sandra, handed me the wrapped box. I carefully unwrapped the box, lifted the lid and slowly folded the tissue paper back. There, in the box, was the beautiful [...]
Turning a Corner?
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December 8, 2011
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My sister, Sandra, was murdered. I say it, I write, I think it, and still, 26 months after her death, I have moments that I can’t believe it happened. I have moments that it still seems surreal. I have moments that I ask myself, how did this happen to my sister, our family. I did [...]
Sister Honors Brother and Herself by Recovering from Loss
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December 5, 2011
2 Responses
A surprising secret about grief is it can become like a good friend, comfortable and routine. My only sibling, a younger brother, took his life years ago and for many years, I suffered like many people do. Grief was my life, and living well enough to appear okay to others was a great effort. But [...]
Sister is Gone, Her Legacy is Immortal
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November 22, 2011
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“What we do for ourselves dies with us. What we do for others and the world, remains and is immortal”. ~ Albert Pine When I heard those words, I immediately thought about my sister. Sandra was a school teacher. She taught school for well over 30 years. She was passionate about her work, her students. [...]
Aftershock of a Murder
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November 13, 2011
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It will soon be 26 months since my beautiful sister, Sandra, lost her life by the hands of a murderer. I think back on the last 26 months and all that happened, all I learned. I often described those months as a rollercoaster. Emotions and feelings were up and down, up and down. Lately, I’ve [...]
Don’t Let a Loss Make You Give Up Your Dreams
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November 5, 2011
2 Responses
If you had asked me after my brother took his own life if I held revenge or a need for justice in my heart, I would have told you no. I was too broken, my emotional core was in too many pieces, and most of my feelings surrounded sadness. I would have said such deep [...]
Her Faith Pulled Her Through Series of Losses
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October 2, 2011
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It’s been eleven years since I stood next to my dying brother’s bed and stroked his hair, trying to give him comfort in his time of need. He and I were both certain the end was creeping in just as day turns into evening. We knew it, but never spoke of it. I was standing [...]
Guilty! Sister Comforted That Murderer is Confined Forever
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September 16, 2011
1 Response
The trial for my sister’s murderer ended yesterday. It was a very intense week to say the least. The state rested about 3:30 pm. The case was turned over to the jury about 4 pm. We waited. I felt confident. I knew the prosecutors had done their very best. Still we waited. Finally, about 4 [...]
The Three Ds of Dealing with Grief
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July 24, 2011
1 Response
It will soon be two years since my dear sister was murdered. Two years. Sometimes it seems like forever, yet most days, it seems like only yesterday. Over the last two years, I have worked very hard on myself. I have learned patience. I have learned to really not sweat the small stuff. I [...]
Loss of a Twin has Huge Impact
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July 13, 2011
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Susan Heim, a writer for Chicken Soup For The Soul, asked me to write an article for a twin publication on bereavement geared to the parents of twins. At first it seemed unsuitable for twins to hear about the possibility of an untimely death of their twin. This column appeared in Triplets, Moms and [...]
Casey Anthony Verdict Stirs Fears in Sister of Murdered Woman
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July 10, 2011
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Like many people this past week, I heard the verdict in the Casey Anthony trial. I did not follow the trial closely so I really don’t know what evidence was presented. I do know that I have read much of the evidence was circumstantial. With my sister’s murder trial postponed for the 7th time recently, [...]
Sibling Bonds
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July 5, 2011
3 Responses
You are my brother and always will be Not even death can take that away from me. The love we share is everlasting A bond that can never be broken. I hate saying I miss you but It´s true. Every day. The fights, the chats, the small things Mean even more now they´re gone. [...]
Twin who Died in the Womb Became Guardian Angel
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June 24, 2011
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Last fall, I gave my writing students a very powerful exercise taken from the work of Deena Metzger. The basic premise was to choose a traumatic incident from our past—one that changed the course of our lives for the worse—a moment when we felt betrayed or abandoned or alone, a moment when an essential part [...]
Father’s Day After the Death of a Brother
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June 13, 2011
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“You know that story, Finding Nemo?” my 4-year-old nephew asked. “That’s a story with a happy ending because he gets to find his daddy.” It was six days since my brother, my nephew’s father, had died and oh, how my heart broke hearing this simple observation. This will be our 5th Father’s Day without my [...]
What To Do With a Loved One’s Possessions?
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May 28, 2011
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What to do with your loved one’s possessions? Less than two months after my sister’s murder, her 24-year-old daughter (my niece) called and asked for my help. My sister owned her home and the insurance company would pay for a total restoration; however, everything had to be removed from the home before the restoration could [...]
Snow and Sibling-Loss
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May 15, 2011
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Snow fell from the cold winter skies when my beloved sister was buried. Miniature, delicate snowflakes seemed so out of place in the cemetery filled with grief, tears and darkness. I stared into the sky, away from the casket, and became completely captivated by the gorgeous snowfall. I needed something to distract my mind, even [...]
Heaven Bound
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May 6, 2011
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Heaven Bound Year after year On your special day Mother’s Day I brought you flowers Gave you a hug and kiss Reminded you how special you were. Every one of those years I knew you were grateful For my gifts and my love Yet, a sadness remained In your beautiful blue eyes It [...]
Woman Finds it Hard to Trust after Sister’s Murder
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March 26, 2011
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“A normal reaction to a very abnormal situation.” My psychologist spoke those words to me so often in the months following my sister’s murder. Choosing to seek the help of psychologist was one of the most important decisions I made. I discussed so many emotions and feelings with her. Emotions and feelings I would have [...]
Releasing Anger While Dealing with Loss
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March 16, 2011
3 Responses
As most of us know, there are certain things that trigger our emotions while on this journey of grief. I think it’s safe to say that we all understand there are different stages of grief, different emotions and feelings also. Many people experience anger while grieving. Anger at the deceased, anger at God, anger at [...]
For Family of Murder Victim, Wheels of Justice Turn Slowly
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March 8, 2011
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My sister was murdered on September 17, 2009. Six months and 5 days later, on March 23, 2010, an arrest was made. It will soon be 18 months since her death. It will soon be 12 months since the arrest was made. I’ve been told that the court process will be slow. It will take [...]
Choose to Let Go of Grief and Pain
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March 6, 2011
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Wild-eyed, I stared at the reflection in the mirror. I no longer recognised myself. My eyes were haunted by the pain and suffering not only of my brother’s death but of all the other losses I’d experienced throughout my life. My once long red hair was gone, hacked off in a fit of fury as [...]
When Living in Grief, ‘Keep Walking’
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February 20, 2011
3 Responses
Within two weeks after my sister’s death, I knew, as did my husband, that I was not in a good place. I felt like I was walking around the edge of a big black hole. One missed step and I would fall into that hole. My husband gently suggested I go see my doctor. I [...]
The Unique Nature of Sibling Loss
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February 18, 2011
15 Responses
I can still remember the call that told me my younger brother was dead. It was from my grandmother. Funnily enough, I’d been contemplating that my grandparents were getting old and that I needed to prepare myself for their deaths. I never expected that I would receive a call from them to tell me that [...]
Death of a Sister: ‘Part of My Soul Has Left Me’
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January 30, 2011
12 Responses
And I walk to your grave alone, in the cold demise of Fall. It seems so much colder here without the comfort of knowing that you will be here to protect me in this life as you have so well. The sky is white and endless. The sun has been cloaked by the cryptic fog. [...]
