“You’ve always been strong-willed.” Grandma’s words stung as my wounded heart wilted for a moment. Searching for understanding, I shared my dismay at her characterization of me, her oldest grandchild, and asked her to explain. “It’s not a bad thing,” she clarified. “Ever since you were a little girl, you knew what you believed. And [...]
Found 19 results
Father’s Day Brings Fond Memories of ‘Grandpop’
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June 14, 2011
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My Grandpop was a legend in my small hometown mostly because of his many “unusual hobbies” – like counting how many flies he could swat on a front porch glider on any given August day. As scores of commuters rushed by our house, they regularly shouted, “Hello, Pop, how many flies today?” Grandpop, pushing 90 [...]
‘Honest Grief’ Helps 10-Year-Old Deal With Grandpa’s Death
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March 7, 2011
1 Response
I was ten, playing with my friend across the street from Grandma and Grandpa’s bungalow. I was so grown-up now. I got to ride the bus ALL ALONE to visit, and it was a 3-hour trip! We were on the porch, and I looked up to see Grandma crashing out the back door, running toward the backyard. [...]
First Responder Learned Calm from Grandmother
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January 19, 2011
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I was born in the mountains of North Carolina and grew up on a small farm with my grandparents. All of my family were members of the local Baptist Church. My grandfather passed away when I was five. His passing was sudden and extremely painful for me. During the funeral, the entire family was eerily [...]
Explaining Grandmother’s Death to a Toddler
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September 15, 2010
3 Responses
Question from a Reader: Basically, everything I’ve ever read recommends that a toddler not be shielded from the truth, and I believe that. However, there is a set of special circumstances here. My daughter saw her grandmother every day since she was born, as my mother cared for her while I was at work. The [...]
The Power of Remembering: Grandfather’s Pipe
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May 18, 2010
1 Response
A person who is gone can live on in memory as an active agent in one’s life, not just as someone you love and miss, not just as a nostalgic sadness. — Elizabeth Harper Neeld, in Seven Choices: Finding Daylight after Loss Shatters Your World The following piece was written by my younger son, Benjamin [...]
Holiday Treats Stir Up Memories of Loved Ones
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November 14, 2009
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Nana made candied orange peel every year. Dishes of this sweet treat appeared at the Thanksgiving table and Christmas dinner. In fact, the holidays would not be the same without this candy. After Nana died, my elder daughter continued the tradition, until she died two years ago. She was the mother of our only grandchildren [...]
New College Grad: Am I OK After Death of Grandmother?
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October 8, 2009
2 Responses
Dear Drs. Heidi and Gloria: I know everyone says that people grieve in their own way. I just need to know that I am ok. My grandmother helped raise me. A couple weeks after I graduated from college this summer, I walked up to my grandma’s house for dinner like I did every night when [...]
Telling a Child About Two Deaths in One Day
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June 22, 2009
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By Pamela Gabbay, M.A., FT – My mind was simultaneously racing around in circles and dull as a knife. She’s only four… four. I could not fathom how I was going to tell my four-year-old daughter that her beloved grandmother, my mom, had just died. Her grandmother, who called her “my little Meg,” and lovingly [...]
What Do We Do With the Treasures in Grandma’s Hope Chest?
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May 19, 2009
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By Terri Saeed – A hope chest filled with a wedding dress from 1940, countless photo albums, a high school scrapbook from 1931, a memory book with witty quotations from depression era teenagers, college transcripts, baby booties and more. The contents of the chest represented over nine decades of memories. What do we do now? [...]
“Honey, Grandma Died”: Talking to Your Children About Tough Issues
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April 29, 2009
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It’s so, so hard to have to tell your son or daughter that their grandfather, grandmother, or parent has died. We dread it so much that we avoid it, but this is a time when our children need us to most. They need us to be clear. They need us to answer their questions. How Do [...]
The New Wallet
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April 8, 2009
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For my birthday this past year I got a brand new Coach wallet from my fiance. Now, before I met my fiance I was used to being called Coach as I coached a baseball team for four years, not having it as a personal accessory. I have come to learn that has great [...]
Helping a Child Cope With the Death of a Grandparent
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March 16, 2009
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The death of a grandparent can be especially difficult for a young child. But there are ways that you can help the child cope. For example, you can ask the child to draw some pictures of her and her grandfather together and then tell you about the pictures. Or you can suggest that the child [...]
Loss of First Grandparent a Major Blow
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February 10, 2009
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Katherine writes: I lost my grandfather last month, and this was my first loss of a close loved one. I am 28 years old. I can’t seem to stop thinking about my grandfather. Granted, it has only been just about two weeks, but I am afraid this pain is going to last forever. I find [...]
The last man standing…
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January 16, 2009
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The old saying, “Save the best for last” never rings more true in certain situations in life. When my godfather died in 1992, at age 44, I was a senior in high school and was devastated. It was my first lesson in life that anyone could die young, even in your own [...]
Obama Right to Interrupt Campaign
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November 6, 2008
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By Neil Chethik – President-elect Barack Obama’s decision to leave the campaign trail to visit his dying grandmother may have been difficult in the short run: it came less than two weeks before election day. But the decision is almost certain to help him now as he comes to terms with her death. Research from [...]
Poem: My Grandfather and His War Buddies Outside a Whiting Diner, Age 10
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September 4, 2008
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By David Harrity W.J.H., Sr., b. January 31, 1924, d. May 1, 2000 I was old enough to remember your hands waking me-the stars just beginning to move west. But I was too young to understand. The moon found its way down the dark, the flecks sank to the horizon. Light was coming, morning stirring. [...]
