Motherless: Still Learning to be an Orphan

By Lisa Peacock —

Today I woke up and felt off.  You all know what I am talking about.  That nagging feeling that something is wrong but you just do not know what.  I rolled myself out of bed and tried to throw off the heavyness that was pushing down on my shoulders.  I wanted to just curl back up in bed and go back to sleep, but I was not sure why.  As I struggled to uncover the inner answer I mechanically went about my day.

I realized that I was longing for the comfort of my mother.  I have been personally struggling with relationships and I just want to curl up in my mothers loving arms and weep.  It hurts and there is no one to just hold me.  Again I am painfully aware that she is gone.  Her arms will never wrap around me, and her hands will never stroke my hair as she soothes my soul.

It’s twelve years later and I am still learning what it means to be an orphan.

Lisa Peacock is the founder of The Peacock Foundation, www.peacockfoundation.org a life-altering, non-profit organization dedicated to helping grieving and suffering children. Peacock faced hardships at an early age, including the deaths of both parents.?The Peacock Foundation strives to provide the best support care to youth who would otherwise not receive the services we offer. Trauma care for everyone should be a given not a goal.? Reach Lisa Peacock at Lisa@peacockfoundation.org.

Lisa Peacock

More Articles Written by Lisa

Lisa Peacock is the founder of The Peacock Foundation, www.peacockfoundation.org a life-altering, non-profit organization dedicated to helping grieving and suffering children. Peacock faced hardships at an early age, including the deaths of both parents. In 1987, at age 9, Lisa suffered the loss of her father in a plane crash. Then at 19, her mother died in a car accident. She dealt with depression, anxiety, guilt, and anger. While coping with her situation, she felt a calling to help others who were suffering from traumas. In 2002, The Peacock Foundation was founded. The foundation quickly began programs at South Park in South Central Los Angeles. There we were able to breathe hope in the lives of young children coping with gang violence, sub-level education, a lack of parental involvement, depression, fear, and more. Subsequently, the Foundation began programs all over LA County. The programs are always focused on youth that are coping with traumatic situations that inhibit their development and security. The Peacock Foundation strives to provide the best support care to youth who would otherwise not receive the services we offer. Trauma care for everyone should be a given not a goal. Reach Lisa Peacock at Lisa@peacockfoundation.org. Lisa appeared on the radio show “Healing the Grieving Heart” discussing “Finding Meaning After the Loss of Both Parents.” To hear LIsa being interviewed on this show by Dr. Gloria & Dr. Heidi Horsley, click on the following link: www.voiceamericapd.com/health/010157/horsley122707.mp3

2 Comments

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *



  • Elizabeth says:

    Dear Lisa,

    I’m sorry for your loss and understand what you are going through. My mother died when I was 14, after a long battle with cancer that started when I was about 10. My father died when I was 17 from a massive heart attack. It’s been 35 years and some days it feels like it was yesterday.

    I missed so much. I never got to know them as adults. The little things, like Mom teaching me to wear make-up, and the big things like graduations and my wedding.

    They come and go in my dreams now..some are so real I believe they’ve really come to tell me I’ll be ok. I’ve lately really needed them; I lost my 29 year old son Jayson to cancer. I’m reeling again and still trying to find my footing and figure out how to go on.

    I know how you feel, and you are in my prayers.

    • Lisa says:

      Elizabeth,
      There are no words that can offer any consolation worthy of the losses you have endured. On the journey together I am comforted to know that I am not alone. I hope you can feel the same and please reach out to me if you ever need anything.
      To talk, or vent, or just know someone else is there. I can not even begin to comprehend what you are feeling. The loss of a child is unimaginable.
      I am praying for you and your family.

      Lisa