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Dealing with Painful Memories of a Loved One

Posted on August 19, 2017 - by Harriet Hodgson

Losing a loved one was awful enough. But when you least expect it, you may recall painful memories — an odd experience, an argument, hurtful words best forgotten. You wish the painful memories would go away and leave you alone. Still, they they keep reappearing, and nagging at you. I have some understanding of your feelings. My elder daughter made some poor decisions in her teens, decisions that hurt her and the family. Thankfully, she found the courage to earn an engineering degree, an MBA, industry certifications, and had a promising job. Then my daughter died. Proud as I am […]

Christina Vasquez: Art Therapy

Posted on August 17, 2017 - by Connie Vasquez

Board certified art therapist Christina Vasquez spoke with the executive director of Open to Hope, Dr. Gloria Horsley, during the 2015 annual Association of Death Education and Counseling Conference about the role art can play in the grieving process. She works in New Orleans in a psychiatric hospital as well as in a private practice. One of the first things clinicians can do to help patients in the grief process is to provide a safe place, explains Vasquez. “My approach to art therapy is meeting them (the patients) where they’re at,” she says. Entering into the process with compassion sets […]

Tina Barrett: Montana Grief Center Offers Outdoor Support for Kids and Teens

Posted on August 16, 2017 - by Heidi Horsley

A counselor at the Tamarack Grief Resource Center, Dr. Tina Barrett attended the 2015TANA Association of Death Education and Counseling conference where she spoke with the Executive Director of Open to Hope, Dr. Heidi Horsley. Barret’s goal is to “stabilize kids, adults and communities following loss” in the Missoula, Montana area. Offering both support programs and education programs, these programs are earmarked for kids and teens as well as schools that may need help handling grieving students after a loss. “We specialize in grief camps and retreats,” she shares, but even the non-camp groups and programs try to get attendees […]

Galen Goben: Faith and Healing After a Death

Posted on August 15, 2017 - by Heidi Horsley

The Grief Support Coordinator for Forest Lawn, Galen Goben, spoke with Dr. Heidi Horsley of the Open to Hope Foundation during the 2015 Association for Death Education and Counseling conference about having faith after a death. Forest Lawn is an organization in California that helps people plan ahead for death, including full funeral, crematorium and cemetery services. He’s also an ordained minister of the Christian Church of the Disciples of Christ and says that one of the best ways to heal after a loss is learning how to “live with the pain.” However, you also have to learn that there […]

Quitter? Returning to College After a Family Death

Posted on August 15, 2017 - by Gloria Horsley

Whether it’s the loss of a parent, sibling or friend grief can be all consuming and lead to a deep depression that makes it difficult to deal with life’s normal routine. Dealing with the death of a loved one can be particularly difficult for college students, especially if they are away from home. They often have trouble dealing with their loss because of the overwhelming energy grief requires on top of the demands of attending classes, focusing on homework and participating in the social life that college offers. A study published by Purdue University found that approximately 40% of college students […]

Daniela Silva: Coping with Grief in the Brazilian Culture

Posted on August 12, 2017 - by Gloria Horsley

Daniela Silva of Brazil recently spoke with Dr. Gloria Horsley of the Open to Hope Foundation during the Association for Death Education and Counseling conference about the difference in grieving between Brazilian and US cultures. In Brazil, Silva explains that the extended family is very involved with the grieving process. However, the idea of talking about grief isn’t as accepted in Brazil as it is in the US. Plus, Silva explains, “We don’t have programs, we have little professional training in grief therapy and we’re trying to improve this now.” Hospices are rare in Brazil, with the first one opening […]

Galen Goben: Putting Words to Grief

Posted on August 9, 2017 - by Neil Chethik

The Open to Hope Foundation spoke to the Grief Support Coordinator at Forest Lawn, Galen Goben, about the challenges of putting words to grief after a death. Forest Lawn is an organization throughout southern California that helps with full planning of a death, including funeral, crematory and cemetery services. Goben has been serving as a grief supporter professionally for eight years with Forest Lawn, but also has 15 years of experience as an ordained minister. “Grief (can be) a completely overwhelming experience,” says Goben, and that can make it difficult to speak and listen in the language of grief. “Giving […]

Ana Bendana: Bereavement and Culture in Nicaragua

Posted on August 8, 2017 - by Gloria Horsley

“Culture makes a difference,” says Ana Bendana when interviewed by Dr. Gloria Horsley at the Association for Death Education and Counseling 2015 conference. Bendana came to the conference from Nicaragua to learn and share how grieving differs around the world. She says so many third world or developing countries have suffered and survived so many catastrophes that it’s shifted how grieving is done. “It does build resilience, or simply numbs you,” she says, which can make processing grief look easier on the surface, but can lead to negative long-term effects if not addressed. Revolutions, earthquakes and other disasters have taken […]

‘If I Had Six Months to Live’: Taking Inventory of Your Life

Posted on August 7, 2017 - by Mary Joye

In one week, I attended two funerals of people who had a big influence on my life. As the veil between heaven and earth gets closer with age and time, I noticed that at these funerals, among the weeping was silence. The reverence is part of our tradition. People also come to celebrate the lives of those they have lost. The brevity of this article is not for a lack of reverence but of respect to the time we spend here with our loved ones. We are all headed in the direction of the transition from this life into whatever […]

Shades of Grief: How Personal Traits Influence Our Grief

Posted on August 7, 2017 - by Charles Patterson

The popular press is full of articles about how your personality type affects your happiness and success. Please ignore them–also the official diagnostic manual of the American Psychiatric Association. A technical diagnosis may help a professional help you, but to look it up may be confusing and do more harm than good. Everyone is different. Your personality is the sum total of all the habits of behavior that you’ve learned during your lifetime. Some are just little mannerisms and others are complex, aesthetically and morally chosen responses to major life events. The number of possible habits, or traits, you […]