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Recovering from a Loss is Up to You

Posted on April 30, 2014 - by Harriet Hodgson

My mother had a saying and used it often: The good fairy isn’t coming. The saying applied to many aspects of life. She would say it before she began a task, such as cleaning the house, or going to the grocery store. When my mother said the good fairy wasn’t coming she was implying – and showing – that I was responsible for myself. I learned this lesson in childhood and have lived it many times. In 2007, after my daughter, father-in-law, brother, and former son-in-law all died, my mother’s saying came to mind. Coping with grief was up to […]

Unending Love: Death Does Not End the Relationship

Posted on April 29, 2014 - by Donna Miesbach

One of the things that makes it so difficult to adjust after losing a loved one is the absence of their physical presence, and while there is no denying that we cannot see them anymore, the love is still there, and that love is a link that cannot be broken. One could even say it is our eternal connection to each other. That love is what joins us in spirit, whether we are in the body or not. Some of my children live 1500 miles from here, and yet we are very close. Our love for each other connects us […]

How Tokens and Linking Objects May Help the Bereaved

Posted on April 24, 2014 - by Harriet Hodgson

“I’ve come to see the flag,” she declared. The white-haired woman had come from skilled nursing section of the nursing home to the rehabilitation unit. She parked her walker, sat down, and peered at the flag outside the window. “Look at that!” she exclaimed. “The flag is straight out. That’s beautiful.” I was sitting at a table with my husband, who was in rehabilitation for wound care and physical therapy on his paralyzed legs. After a few silent moments, the woman turned to me and smiled. “My husband was in the navy for years,” she explained, “and seeing the flag […]

Moving to a New Home Sparks Grief

Posted on April 21, 2014 - by Harriet Hodgson

My husband’s aorta split and during emergency surgery he had a spinal stroke. Now his legs are paralyzed and he can’t return to our current home, which has lots of stairs. So our home is for sale and I’m building a wheelchair friendly town home for us. It’s supposed to be finished in a month, and I’ll move there before my husband. I want to have everything ready for him: a hospital bed, bedside table, and shower wheelchair. Thinking about all I have to do wakes me up at four in the morning. Once I’m awake, I rarely go back […]

Playwright Gary Rudoren on ‘Last Words’

Posted on April 19, 2014 - by Nancy Gershman, LMSW

What’s there to talk about in the 24 hours before “your son, the serial killer” heads to the electric chair? Besides confessions, are there other kinds of “last words” that should happen on our deathbeds? This and more when Gary Rudoren – playwright, director, actor and architect now based in Jerusalem – sits down with memory artist, Nancy Gershman to talk about the premise of his play, “So I Killed a Few People.” Examine the elephant in the room from multiple angles “So I Killed a Few People” is a play I created with David Summers at The Annoyance Theater in Chicago. […]

A Day of Rebirth

Posted on April 16, 2014 - by David Roberts

I originally wrote this piece for my blog on March 1, 2014, my daughter Jeannine’s 11th angelversary date. Since year nine of my life as a parent who has experienced the death of a child, I have written about the teachings I have discovered when spending time with Jeannine, on her angelversary date. I decided that I wanted to share my experience again as we approach spring, a time of both rebirth and renewal. I have discovered clarity in ritual and ceremony, while recognizing that Jeannine still exists, but in a different form of energy. I still have occasional yearnings […]

Grieving Especially Tough During Easter Season

Posted on April 12, 2014 - by Sandra Huerta

While most of us prepare for the Easter season, some people are struggling to survive the death of a loved one. I dedicate the entire month to everyone suffering with grief and sorrow. I too am grief-stricken and I too find April to be a difficult month, especially this year. This month marks the 10th anniversary of my son Sergio’s homicide and while time flies by, for me, it also stands still every time I think of him, every time I miss him. It has been said time and again, that time heals all wounds. Ten years ago, I wanted […]

Can the Cycle of Domestic Violence be Broken?

Posted on April 10, 2014 - by Sandra Huerta

If you or someone you know suffered domestic violence, ask yourself: Have I imitated violence in my home? And will my children do the same when they have their own homes? Have we mimicked violence or victimization from others and will our children do the same? It is up us to analyze our own situations and make tough but healthy decisions in order to break free from hostile living conditions. Have we been imprisoned by dominant forces and have we surrendered our instinct for survival? God created each of us with our own blueprint and with a specific purpose. We […]

Forgiveness

Posted on April 9, 2014 - by John Pete

Forgiveness can be a very hard thing to do. That speaks to how incredibly powerful it is. Like hope, forgiveness is often a stepping stone forward. It can be a necessary part of truly accepting things that cannot be changed; for healing broken hearts and renewing spirit; and for allowing happiness into our lives again. Forgive whenever you can. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. Use forgiveness as a beacon to light a path to healing.

A Mama Finds Memories in a Duplo Box

Posted on April 9, 2014 - by Alice Wisler

In my closet sits one duplo box filled with handwritten cards. The cards were for my little boy Daniel. The boy is now gone, but the cards written to him still remain. When we moved from the house where Daniel lived, Daniel didn’t get to go with us. But the yellow duplo box with cards did. A few of the cards he’d received were after hs first surgery before we knew the lump in his neck was cancer. Most were sent to him during the months he was treated at UNC-Hospitals. The duplo box had been where he’d stored all […]