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Learning Acceptance During Loss and Change

Posted on August 24, 2013 - by Donna Miesbach

Change and transformation are a necessary part of life. Until we are willing to enter into the process with our whole heart, we cannot really let go of the past. The new emerges out of the old. Truly, our pain and suffering, our heartache and our anguish, do mold and shape us in wonderful ways if we but allow them to expand our thinking and our horizons. It is through these teachers that we become more. It is through these changes that we build upon the past and emerge with deeper insight, greater vision, and even a clearer sense of […]

Forging New Bonds with Our Loved Ones

Posted on August 23, 2013 - by John Pete

Perhaps you would like to do something meaningful yet easy to remember your loved one this weekend. You could take a walk to find a special stone or something from nature to put in your garden or windowsill. Or plant some flowers… You could buy an “I Love You” helium balloon at the grocery store and write a letter or poem to go with it. Perhaps you would like to frame a special picture, or craft something special in your loved one’s honor. It can be anything you like. While doing these activities, try to set aside your grief as […]

Personal Growth Following a Loss: One Parent’s Story

Posted on August 22, 2013 - by David Roberts

Providence blinked facing the sun Where are we left to carry on “Until the Day is Done”, by R.E.M Providence Blinked According to Dictionary.com, providence is defined as, among other things, the foreseeing care and guidance of nature over the creatures of the earth. Until May of 2002, I would have accepted that definition without reservation. I felt protected and maybe even immune from the tragedy that affected other individuals in society. Arrogance didn’t drive this perception; I just never allowed my mind to go to the deep, dark places where others already had been. However, providence did blink (mightily, I might […]

Grief Marathon

Posted on August 22, 2013 - by Diane Dettmann

Two weeks after her husband’s death on June 30, 2000, trying to get the grief behind her, Diane Dettmer accepted a new position as a literacy staff developer. Traveling with colleagues to training sessions in various parts of the country added more stress and did little to speed up the grief process. Diane and her husband, John, enjoyed twenty-eight years of marriage; the sudden loss of her loving husband devastated her. In the following excerpt from Diane Dettmann’s memoir, Twenty-Eight Snow Angels: A Widow’s Story of Love, Loss and Renewal, Diane shares insights into the grief she experienced a year […]

Panic Attack After the Death of a Spouse

Posted on August 21, 2013 - by Cindy Adams

I never quite understood what people meant when they said they had a panic attack. I remember thinking, “Oh, it’s all made up in your head. You can control it.” I imagined an anxiousness and fear, but had no idea how debilitating it could be until I became a widow and it happened to me! It actually happened to me on more than one occasion. You can read about another time, in my book, A Widow’s Pursuit. I think it’s a natural part of the grief process. Many of our emotions are out of our control. It’s not something we […]

Getting Through What You’re Going Through: Pastor Rick Warren Models

Posted on August 17, 2013 - by Beth Marshall

Life at Saddleback Church rarely slows down for Pastor Rick Warren and his wife Kay. After four glorious days of Easter services, a typically busy week of ministry began. Christianity Today was scheduled to run an article highlighting Warren’s upcoming book, The Peace Plan. His goal is to reach people all over the world with translations in multiple languages. Five days after Easter, the Warrens’ world changed forever. After several unsuccessful attempts to contact one of their sons, Rick and Kay had a strange sense something wasn’t right. Their twenty-seven year old son, Matthew, had battled depression for most of […]

Just Let Me Be Sad: A Response to the Stigma of Grief

Posted on August 15, 2013 - by Maria Kubitz

We live in a world where – if you have the means – pain and suffering are to be avoided at all costs. We are always looking for the next “quick fix” to alleviate discomfort with the least amount of effort required. In many cases, this means treating the symptoms while ignoring the root cause of the problem. In the United States, we live in a society so uncomfortable with emotional pain that when someone dies, society expects the outward mourning period to end once the funeral is over. When the bereaved do not cooperate with these prescribed time tables, […]

The Basics of Sibling-Loss

Posted on August 13, 2013 - by Zander Sprague

I would like to take some time to focus on parents who have lost a child and have other living children. I plan to talk about the sibling survivor experience to give you an idea of what they are going through. I would like to start by talking about their grief. While I was attending The Compassionate Friend’s National Conference and the Bereaved Parents of the USA gathering this past July, the question I heard most was, “Are my children grieving, because I do not see it?” While I can’t speak for all siblings, what I can say in general […]

Re-Claiming Joy After Loss

Posted on August 13, 2013 - by Donna Miesbach

When my husband and I first found each other, we experienced a joy unlike any we had ever known before. Many was the time we just stood in awe looking at each other, wondering how the miracle had ever happened. What we didn’t know then, and what took me many years to learn after he had passed on, was that joy is our true nature. If that is so, then how do we re-claim what is inherently within us? Seeking joy when in the throes of grief would be like reaching for the moon. At least it was for me. […]

How to Avoid Depression During Grief

Posted on August 10, 2013 - by Doris Jeanette

I didn’t care if I went swimming or not, even though swimming is my favorite activity. I didn’t care what I ate, even though looking forward to delicious food and yummy tastes used to be a daily pleasure. It seemed like nothing mattered anymore. It is easy to get stuck in depression during the grieving process. Instead of moving forward toward the light at the end of the tunnel, you could drop down into depression and not even know you are depressed. If you don’t have a bereavement support group or grief counselor giving you feedback about your mental health […]