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Finding the Gift that Adversity Brings

Posted on February 14, 2013 - by Donna Miesbach

As unwelcome as adversity may be, it does shape and define us in ways that nothing else can. Life does have a way of presenting us with what we most need to learn when we most need to learn it. While these “lessons” may not come in a form we would welcome, almost always they prove to be our most important teachers. The good news is that nothing is ever wasted. All things do come bearing a gift, whether it seems like it at the time or not. It may take a while to find that gift, but it is […]

Letting Go of Things That Belonged to My Daughter

Posted on February 14, 2013 - by Maria Kubitz

Moving on? We just moved to a new house. A new house my daughter has never lived in, and never will. We left an old house where she lived her entire four short years. A house where she spent countless hours playing, eating, sleeping, dressing up, making mischief, making us laugh…the list goes on. But it was also the house where she died. It was the house seared in our memories on that horrible day where our lives changed forever in a way we wish we could just figure out how to undo. As I prepared to move, I had […]

Out of the Closet, Valentine Delights Again

Posted on February 14, 2013 - by Darcie Sims

The lace has grown yellow with age. The edges are tattered, and the glue that held the pieces together has long dried up, leaving only a slight stain on the faded red paper. It is much smaller than I remembered. Perhaps time has caused it to shrink. It seems so fragile, resting here in my palm. The words have nearly faded and even the heavy crayon marks have lost their luster over the years. There’s a smudge of unknown origin on the back, near where the paper was rubbed dangerously thin by uncounted erasure marks. The name is barely legible; […]

Five Tips When Valentine’s Day is Haunting You

Posted on February 13, 2013 - by Kira Copperman

As Valentine’s Day approaches, we are all bombarded with images of romance, relationships and love. Starting in early January, it seems like every business has something to sell related to romance and is trying to capitalize on and add to the societal pressure created to make February 14th a magical day. For those people who are in love, Valentine’s Day can be a wonderful, memorable celebration but for people who are alone, it can be a difficult, endless day. As Valentine’s Day approaches, negative feelings about being alone may seem unavoidable; sad thoughts and even depression are common occurrences around […]

Survivors Left by Suicide Have Special Grief

Posted on February 12, 2013 - by admin

By Father Charles Ruby As we begin a new year, the holidays are over and survivors of a completed suicide breathe a collective sigh of relief. The holidays very often are a very painful time. There are no more holiday gatherings where there is an aura of gaiety. Survivors no longer have to put on the happy face while inside there is a broken and heavy heart. Attending many of these gatherings is done under duress and not wanting to hurt the feelings of family and friends. The invitations are sent hoping that survivors will attend but there is understanding […]

Being Available to Others While Conserving My Strength

Posted on February 11, 2013 - by Anne Hamilton

Since September, 2012, I have been writing a series of articles entitled, “A Forever Decision” based on my experience of losing my beloved dog Camilla. In October, I found that my Uncle Steve has terminal cancer. Uncle Steve is my favorite uncle and is one of the most important people in my life. I continued writing about coping with the grief of his impending loss, as well as day to day challenges involved in caring for him. The articles grew into a larger work of art. I hope that my writing will help others who visit the Open to Hope […]

Reflections on Young-Adult Grief

Posted on February 10, 2013 - by Fran Dorf

I was honored recently to be part of a panel discussion, “Shining a Light on Grief,” with Carole Geithner, author of “If Only,” a young adult novel I thought was enchanting. I’d recommend Carole’s book to anyone, young or old. I’d especially recommend it to bereaved young people, and those who want to learn more in order to help a bereaved friend. Some may find a novel like this more helpful than even a “how-to” book because it organically teaches what, and what not to do and say. “Showing” (as in a novel) is always more effective than “telling” (as […]

Excising Grief: Breast Cancer Sparks Insights

Posted on February 9, 2013 - by Susan Reynolds

This note today is about grief. How long do you hold onto it? How might it affect your personal health? How can you keep tabs on it in relation to other things in your life? February is a big month for me. No, not the anniversary of the death of my spouse or father or other relative. No, it is not the fact that I am single again this Valentine’s day. This month, I have choices to make that appeared from nowhere. I have been diagnosed with breast cancer. Not me! my head and heart echoed. But yes. Six months ago, […]

Making Lemonade: Building on Life’s Challenges

Posted on February 8, 2013 - by Harriet Hodgson

Almost everyone has heard the saying, “When life sends you lemons, make lemonade.” In 2007, I received a bushel-full of lemons: the death of my daughter, death of my father-in-law, death of my brother and only sibling, death of my former son-in-law, and becoming guardian of 15-year-old grandchildren. Six years have passed since I suffered these multiple losses. Now I’m able to see my recovery journey more clearly. To be honest, I’ve surprised myself. Where did the courage come from? How did I make lemonade? First, I made a conscious decision to choose happiness. At my age and stage of life, […]

Profile of Drug-Death Bereaved Parents

Posted on February 7, 2013 - by William Feigelman

This article is adapted from a longer selection first appearing in The Compassionate Friends We Need Not Walk Alone Magazine, (Winter2011/Spring 2012 issue). Parents losing children to a drug overdose or a drug-related death face an especially daunting post-loss adaptation challenge, when compared to other bereaved parents whose children died from suicides, automobile accidents and natural causes. Summing up our survey research results, based on 48 drug-death-bereaved parents, 462 suicide-bereaved, 37 mostly accidental deaths and 24 natural death cases, findings showed drug-death bereaved faced similar social stigmatization from socially significant others as suicide survivors did. What sets these mourners apart […]