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What it Feels Like to Come Alive Again

Posted on September 24, 2012 - by Brandi Reyna

September marks two and a half years since we lost Greg. Two and a half years seems like such a long time and yet feels like such a short amount of time as well. I have felt and noticed a change within myself over the last 6 months. Reflecting upon the first two years of this journey of grief, I felt as though I was “asleep,” in shock, trying to process everything that has happened and just trying to survive not only the loss of my fiancé, but all the secondary losses that stem from losing Greg as well. Then […]

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Healing from Twin-Loss Requires New Connections

Posted on September 22, 2012 - by Mary R. Morgan

So many people are shattered by deep personal grief, by the unique and often unacknowledged experiences of their loss, and by the misunderstood depth and length of their bereavements. The death of my twin brother, Michael, and the different ways I experienced the absence of him in my life, created a deep sense of inner loneliness and outer separation. My healing journey began with what felt like the end of my life.   Out of profound disconnection, I started the slow process of putting the pieces of myself back together within the discovery of new connections, and of making a […]

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A Forever Decision: Part 3

Posted on September 20, 2012 - by Anne Hamilton

On Day 9 after the loss of my beloved Camilla due to a brain tumor, I think it’s important to start the day with love. Whether it’s petting my remaining dog Isabella, or sending love letters to my boyfriend, I feel better when I start the day with something that will last. Because any love given and received is eternal and makes bonds that even death can’t break. And in the future, I’ll feel better knowing that I really showed my love to my loved ones. At least that’s something I can hang on to when the times comes that […]

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A Forever Decision: Part Two

Posted on September 20, 2012 - by Anne Hamilton

My relief is giving way to anxiety and the inability to concentrate. On the sixth day after I put my beloved Camilla to sleep after a long illness, I wake up refreshed, but that feeling soon gives way to dread. Thoughts of Cami keep intruding. Why wasn’t I able to save her? What did I do wrong? Could I have done something different? I still have Isabella, my German Shepherd/Lab, but that doesn’t comfort me. I want Camilla. I want to pet her and feel her fur beneath my fingers. I want to tell her how much I love her. […]

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A Forever Decision: Letting Go of a Dog

Posted on September 20, 2012 - by Anne Hamilton

I’m starting to realize that she is not coming back. Five days ago, I put my beloved dog Camilla to sleep. She had a tumor on her pituitary gland and she was experiencing debilitating symptoms. It was best to end her suffering. It was a forever decision. The first day, I felt relieved. I had been nursing her for a year and a half. I never knew when she would have another seizure. I had to guide her to and from the backyard by clapping so she could follow the sound – she had gone blind. I have another dog […]

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Writing about Mother Helps Turn Pain into Gratitude

Posted on September 17, 2012 - by Kimberly Kirby-Bass

For an adult, the role of your parent in your life changes greatly from when you were a child.  As a child, you depended on them for everything-food, shelter, clothing, guidance and love.  As an adult, you don’t rely on your parents to care for your basic needs any longer; but their role in your life is more as a consultant than a direct care giver. Per Wikipedia, Consulting Guru Peter Block defines a consultant “as someone who has influence over an individual or group, or organization, but who has no direct authority to implement changes.”  In the consulting role […]

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Keys to Making Peace With Death

Posted on September 16, 2012 - by Judith Johnson

There are those among us who are leading the way in demonstrating how to break free of society’s taboo around death. While most of us might be likely to awkwardly say “your color looks good today” to a dying loved one, someone who has made peace with death would be more likely to take his or her hand and say, “I love you and am going to miss you so much.” For most of us, being around dying and death evokes a visceral response of fear and avoidance. We basically view life as good and death as bad. Our fear […]

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It’s OK to be Depressed, Sometimes

Posted on September 15, 2012 - by Cindy Adams

During the first few years of my widowhood, when I was working through my grief, I’d occasionally have to tackle the monster of “DEPRESSION”. Of course the most obvious times were around holidays, special days of birthdays and anniversaries, and lifetime milestones of dance recitals, proms, and graduations. Then there were the longer episodes of depression when I was tired of doing it all alone. Times when everything seemed dark and I didn’t want to be happy. If the depression was caused by the anticipation of a special “day” or holiday, I could usually pull myself out of my slump […]

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The Transformative Power of Grief

Posted on September 13, 2012 - by David Roberts

Embracing a Different Perspective Since my daughter Jeannine’s death at the age of 18 in March of 2003, I have undergone a radical spiritual transformation. I have learned to embrace all that is part of the universe, to help me gain a different perspective on Jeannine’s entry into eternal life.  In the process I have learned that my relationship with Jeannine is ongoing. Who she is, is now a permanent part of who I am and who I want to be.  I still have much to learn on my journey and am poised for that to happen from anyone who […]

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A Life Alone: Adjusting to Being a Widower

Posted on September 12, 2012 - by Abel Keogh

A recent widower recently emailed me the following: Dear Abel, I’ve been going through your blog, and I was wondering what your response would be to learning how to be single, or being a peace with being alone first. You’ve pointed out several times that widowers jump into a relationship to possibly fill in a void, and in that case, perhaps an explanation as to how you dealt with being alone during the first few months would be helpful. I lost my fiancé a month ago, and I am figuring out how to go through this myself. Thanks, Mark (name […]

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