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For Some, There is Blessing Even in Tragedy

Posted on April 24, 2010 - by Kathryn Williams Raths

How does someone pick up the pieces after losing a spouse and child in a tragic car accident that involved their whole family? Sheri Boekweg-Nelson of Plain City, Utah, and her two kids survived this horrific nightmare November, 2000. Sheri described the pain, “I broke so many bones — the worst, my shattered left foot; I still feel pain today. Mentally, it is indescribable, watching my children suffer has been the worst part; they were only seven and nine. It was hard to tell them we would have to go on without their dad, BJ, and sister, Brandi. I almost lost […]

Nature Helps Calm Mother Who Misses Son

Posted on April 23, 2010 - by Debra Reagan

It was the 4th anniversary of our son’s death, and I was having a difficult time. My husband was working out of town, and this meant for the first time we would be apart on this date. I turned to the woods, a place I find myself often when I seek peace. As I started the trail, I noticed a tree that was bent and twisted. Despite the fact that the base of the trunk was nothing but a shell, the tree continued to live and strive to reach the sun. I felt a kinship with that tree. At times, […]

Finding a Cause Helps Those Who are Grieving

Posted on April 22, 2010 - by Sandy Fox

Losing a child will be the most difficult loss in your life, but you can and will get through it. One of the most productive ideas for your well-being after the death is choosing to find a cause, a reason to move on with your life. Parents may become active in different organizations. These include: Compassionate Friends, Bereaved Parents USA or Alive Alone for childless parents. Not only do they join these organizations to help themselves, but in time, they start helping others who are just beginning the journey. Others who want to become even more involved get on the boards and help […]

Father Starts Web Project for Dads Who Have Lost a Child

Posted on April 21, 2010 - by Abel Keogh

After going through the loss of two of my children over an eighteen-month span, I came to the realization that there is a lack of support services and information available to fathers suffering the loss of a child. I made a promise to myself that once I was strong enough, I would find a way to help other men going through the devastating loss of a child. As a result of that promise, I have developed a project that is designed to reach out to all bereaved dads traveling this lonely and, what appears to be, never-ending road known as […]

Poem: A Soul

Posted on April 21, 2010 - by Deborah Tornillo

Hiding amongst The shadows Of a broken heart Lives a soul Torn apart. Blistered and Burned by Death’s Blinding rays Fear of tomorrow Remain today. Peering through The crevasses of Hope and faith Reality slaps her Back into place. Rays of sunshine Happiness and Joy Once trusted And, vital Not anymore. Deborah Ann Tornillo Author, 36 Days Apart Copyright© 2010

Kevin Quiles Has New Book on Spiritual Care to Elderly

Posted on April 20, 2010 - by Kevin Quiles

Spiritual Care to Elderly and Dying Loved Ones is now available. Using over a decade of experience as a spiritual and bereavement counselor, author Kevin Quiles, M.Div. — who is an Open to Hope contributing writer — provides strategies and tools to tackle pressing questions about end-of-life care. Families, friends, faith communities, ministers, and healthcare professionals will find the stories contained in the book both helpful and insightful. Dr. Kenneth Doka calls it “a most useful and practical resource.” Mim Eichler Rivas, coauthor of the book, Pursuit of Happyness, refers to it as “a much needed companion for anyone traveling the difficult road.” And Thomas […]

What is the Meaning of Hope?

Posted on April 20, 2010 - by Norman Fried

What is the meaning of hope, and how can it help us through the days and nights of our despair? For many, hope is a quality that imbues us with grace in the face of adversity. It is an internal process that allows us to encounter the world with awe and faith in a more numinous realm, an intrinsic and existential mindset of being. For others, hope is synonymous with “want” or “expectation.” It denotes a passive, “wait and see,” approach to a desired object or outcome. Understood in this way, hope is a state of mind, a wish or […]

Poem: High on a Shelf

Posted on April 19, 2010 - by Deborah Tornillo

I put my heart in a box Placed it high on a shelf Where it will be safe with Loving memories of you. When I’m filled with sorrow I’ll peek inside the box Feel my grieving heart and Remember joy with you. When I’m filled with anger I’ll peek inside the box Feel my heart hurting and Remember happiness with you. When I’m filled with fear I’ll peek inside the box Feel my lonely heart and Remember feeling safe with you. It will be safe on the shelf In a beautifully carved box My heart beating strongly For the day […]

Coping With Sudden and Traumatic Loss

Posted on April 19, 2010 - by Harriet Hodgson

A sudden and traumatic death shatters your world. The changes may be readily apparent or may take months, or even years, to emerge. In 2007, my elder daughter (mother of my twin grandchildren) and father-in-law died on the same weekend. I was in such shock I could hardly think. Yet there were burial arrangements to make and memorial services to plan. I knew I had to do my grief work and did not shirk it. This work paid off and I was starting to feel better when my brother died eight weeks later. Several months later the twin’s father studied […]

The Sweater: Daughter Wishes She Could Repay Father’s Gift

Posted on April 18, 2010 - by Claire Perkins

It is the third of December 2008. I sit by my dad’s bedside, holding his hand and watching him breathe, holding my breath as his stops for several seconds, only exhaling when he finally takes another faltering breath. I count: ten seconds of silence followed by a gasping breath, then fifteen seconds of shallow noisy breathing. Over and over the cycle repeats. His mouth opens and closes with a little pop on each exhale —“guppy breathing,” the hospice nurse calls it. His left hand reaches up, as if grasping for something—or maybe pushing something away. I read to him: Jonathan […]