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Does Talking About Grief Help?

Posted on February 16, 2022 - by Phil Rich

Does talking about grief help? Any time you pick up a book that deals with psychology or self-improvement, or you listen to a therapist, you hear the idea that it’s important for you to express your feelings and put your thoughts into words. Why? Talking about things that bother or affect us doesn’t change a thing in the world around us. In fact, it’s not at all unusual to hear people ask, “What is the point of talking about ‘it,’ if talking about it doesn’t change it?” It’s not that self-expression – talking about grief – changes the world. It […]

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Boycotting the Grief Olympics

Posted on February 16, 2022 - by Greg Adams

Boycotting the Grief Olympics Mostly, we humans love comparisons and competition. Around the world, there are competitions going on all the time. Who bakes the best cake, spells the most words, designs the best product? Perhaps nowhere is competition more focused and organized than in sports. Who runs the fastest or jumps the highest? Or who puts the bouncy ball more often through the metal hoop, in the back of the net, across the goal line, or over the net and in the court? And winter brings even more creativity with skies, skates, sleds, and brooms and stones (search the […]

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Writing Condolence Letters Can Heal the Writer

Posted on February 16, 2022 - by Barbara Redfield

Writing Condolence Letters My father was a Man of Letters. During his years at Princeton, he was head of the Press Club where he was able to supplement his scholarship money by reporting on Ivy League sports to the NY Herald Tribune and the Associated Press. He served as a combat correspondent in the Marine Corps during World War II. He carried a rifle and a typewriter in the invasions of Saipan and Titian and spent three days in a raft after his ship was hit by a kamikaze. I remember when he came home. He got off the train […]

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Grief Doodling Can Help You Heal

Posted on February 4, 2022 - by Harriet Hodgson

What is Grief Doodling? “Is it straight?” asked the activities director. She was hanging 21 pictures I contributed to a retirement community art exhibit. The pictures are doodle art, a combination of doodling, comics, and folk art. I turned to this art form when I was caring for my husband, John. My husband was dying. John knew it and I knew it. We rarely talked about his impending death because we’d talked about almost everything during 63 years of marriage. I’m a freelance writer and John was my biggest fan; I wanted to keep my career going for John and […]

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Diary of a Bereaved Mother, Part 2

Posted on January 20, 2022 - by Terri Leidich

The following is an excerpt from From a Grieving Mother’s Heart. An excerpt from earlier in this book containing the diary of a bereaved mother is available here.   Diary of a Bereaved Mother January 13th (Day 221) Now that the young man who caused your death has been meted his punishment and the courts have done their job . . . or did they . . . I should be able to “turn the page” and move forward, but it’s not easy. Grieving is full of many sharp turns and curves, and they often catch me off-balance like they […]

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Diary of a Bereaved Mother, Part 1

Posted on January 20, 2022 - by Terri Leidich

The following diary entries are excerpted from From a Grieving Mother’s Heart. Read part 2 of the diary at https://www.opentohope.com/diary-of-a-bereaved-mother-part-2/   Diary of a Bereaved Mother June 11th (Day 5) We laid your body to rest today, son. Were you there? I think so. Did you see the mass of flowers flanking your coffin in the church? Did you hear the music and see your friends all somber as they ushered your casket in and out? Did you hear the beautiful sermon that Holly gave; the words to the song that I had written a month ago; the special poem […]

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Mourn Like a Dog: Mark the Absence, Maintain Connections

Posted on January 20, 2022 - by Joni Sensel

Mourn Like a Dog After my beloved partner, Tony, died without warning early one morning in 2017, I lived for the occasional sense that his spirit was near. Our dogs never reacted to the unseen energy I felt, but they did express loss. The black lab mix, Bape, drooped immediately. His master’s long absence on a trip the previous fall hadn’t fazed this boisterous dog, but after Tony’s death, Bape moped on the dog bed for about ten days before starting to act like himself. Our other dog, Jazz, didn’t seem to react at all for a week. No surprise […]

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I’m Joining the Circus: Movement is Healing

Posted on January 20, 2022 - by Sherry Walling

Movement is Healing Four months after brother died, I had a six-pack. Not the beverage kind, the abdominal kind. My dad and my brother both had died that year I turned 40. It was a year of heavy things. In addition to the crash course in death, I was running my own business and caring for three intense children. I was trying to show up for my husband, to be a friend to my friends, and also grapple with my own mortality. I did what every reasonable, middle-aged, working professional and mother of three would do in this situation: joined […]

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Dreaming About My Daughter

Posted on January 2, 2022 - by Patsy Freeman

It was an extraordinary night dreaming about my daughter. In the dream, my throat was covered with layers of stuff that prevented me from speaking out. I began coughing and coughing and could hardly stop. With each cough, some of the layers dropped away. My family in spirit, including my deceased daughter Jasmine, were around me, cheering me on to write. WRITE. WRITE. COME ON, WRITE! Okay. I am. I will. Yes! Then I saw in my mind those football rattles that go round and round making celebratory noises, and there were whoops of laughter all around me. Jasmine stays […]

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Mom’s First Birthday Without Daughter

Posted on January 2, 2022 - by Patsy Freeman

I was dreading my first birthday without my daughter, and I knew that if I didn’t mark it differently it would be unbearable. The days leading up to it are grim. My body begins aching all over, so much so that I worry I am going back to how I was at the start. Then I remember that the body has its own cellular memory. It forgets nothing. My body knows full well that my birthday is approaching. On the day itself, I am relieved to wake up feeling better. I leave the house before the postman comes, knowing there […]

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