Abel Keogh

Another Season and the Yellow Butterfly

April 22, 2004, my life was forever changed. My 14 year old daughter, Olivia Corinne Hoff passed away. It will be four years April 22, 2008.

As I look back now, I don’t even know how I survived. I didn’t think it was possible to live another day, another week, another month and another year, but I have. My grief journey continues to this day, such hard work, every day. For those parents who have lost a child, you all know too well how difficult this journey is. Along the way, I felt as though I were stuck, unable to move forward and, of course, not wanting to. By moving forward, I felt that I would be leaving Olivia behind, accepting life without her. I have moved on but in a different way. I will always have a broken heart, my life is not filled with joy, nor do I look forward to the future. It’s too hard to look beyond today.

A Young Widow Tells Her Story

Ir’s almost like a relief to read thoughts from another person that I can actually relate to. Sometimes you get tired of explaining yourself to those who couldn’t possibly understand what you are feeling because they haven’t experienced what you have experienced. I was widowed at age 28, I am now 31. I lost my husband in March 2005 to a car accident on our oldest daughter’s 13th birthday. I was actually searching for grieving counselors for her when I came across this site (very glad I found it). My husband and I were also together for some time before […]

A Note to a Friend, a New Widow

Dear Friends of the Grief Blog, Heather’s note to her friend, who just lost her husband, reminds us all how difficult it is for the school year to start without our special people. Heather is a school teacher and my daughter and Heidi’s sister. I wanted to share this note with all of you because I was so touched with how she shared her brother’s death in order to help a friend. Thanks for all of you and take special care of yourselves for the next few weeks. Dr. Gloria Melinda, Hope the first days of school are happy for […]

A Sudden Death of a Healthy Man

Hi, Ok i suppose I start by saying I lost my partner Michael on May 16th 2007 he was only 37 years old fit and healthy.I went to bed on that Tusday night late so Mick had been asleep for awhile then early hours Wednesday morning the twins woke me up they wanted a bottle so i got up to get them 1.On the way back to bed Mick passed me he went to the toilet and came back to bed.I was awake and he knew this but as soon as he got the covers up and got comfy I […]

A poem for Michael

Michael, Heart racing, shallow breaths, the tears keep falling without rest. For you left me without a goodbye, softly in your sleep you did die. Feelings of regret,need and dispare, for you my angel i do care. Memories creep in awake or asleep, these are the little things i will keep. Until we meet again my heart will ache, but i will stay strong for our kids sake. Love you Mick xxxxx Jodie

How Do You Mourn An Ex-Spouse?

My first wife died several weeks ago. We were married almost thirty years, we have four kids and four grandsons, and we were divorced four years ago. Donna was sick for many years, and her body finally gave out. As sad as it was, it was also a relief. As I am fond of saying, The Angel of Death is not always an enemy, and in this case it was true. But as difficult as the last years might have been between us, her death created new and wrenching dilemmas for me and the kids. I know nobody wants to […]

A Widow Shares

I am a 32yr old Widow. I was almost 28 at the time of my husbands death due to a tragic car accident and just into my third month of marriage. This September would be a celebration of our 5yr wedding anniversary. Although, it is only July, I am having bitter-sweet memories & tear as that was the happiest day of my life. I was told by a friend last week that I basically shouldn’ be crying anymore! What??? The tears/sadness aren’t like they used to be, my pain is less often than the one year, two year, etc. I […]

A Father’s Grief by David Pellegrin

A Father’s Grief By David Pellegrin Honolulu, Hawaii At my second meeting of The Compassionate Friends about three years ago, one of the mothers said how nice it was to see a man attending, since “men grieve differently from women.” Her remark was no doubt meant to help put me at ease. I hadn’t said a thing so far, and might have been intimidating in my silence. But it caught me off guard. What I was feeling after George’s death was so absolute, so awful, how could it possibly come with any “differences”? Would one grieve differently for an infant […]

Shopping (after the death of my daughter)

“May I help you?” The answer is always “no, thank you.” And then I say I am fine When in reality my words are nothing more than lies. My heart is so weary Of trying to pretend I am feeling cheery. Behind those laughing eyes Lies pain on the face in whose falsehood lies. Broken heart and broken dreams A false facade hides in those unheard screams. Pain no one could ever imagine Fights a fight that no one can ever win. “May I help you?” The clerk repeats And again I say “no” as our eyes meet. Things are […]

Real Men Do Cry – words from Eric Hipple

For those who didn’t get a chance to listen to the archives of the Eric Hipple. Heidi and I wanted to give you some of the special things he said on the show. Please listen to the March 15th archives and let us know what you thought. Gloria (see quotes below.For the entire transcript choose “Past Show Transcripts from the sidbar on the right) …our topic today is Real Men Do Cry and our guest is Eric Hipple. Eric Hipple was quarterback for the Detroit Lions from 1980-1989 and he lost his 15-year-old son, Jeff, to a self-inflicted gunshot wound […]