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Why Does it Hurt So Much?

Posted on June 13, 2016 - by Nina Impala

Grieving people usually don’t ask directly: Why does it hurt so much? But I see that it hurts; I hurt like that. It hurts because you loved. You were connected to another human being heart to heart. It hurts. Death hurts a lot when we love like this. This hurt causes an incredible amount of suffering that hopefully this article may help you with. Recently, watching the suffering of a mother losing her child, a sister losing her brother, and a father losing his son, I was moved to think deeply about human suffering. I prayed about it; in my […]

Tragedy in Orlando, Collective Grief and Aftershocks of Loss

Posted on June 13, 2016 - by Marty Tousley

If the tragic events in Orlando yesterday were heavy for you and served as a painful reminder of the personal loss or losses you’ve endured, you are not alone in the sorrow you’re experiencing today. Once again our entire nation finds itself immersed in collective grief. For many Americans the feelings of grief associated with this horrific event seem just as raw as they did when the terrorist attacks happened on September 11, 2001. A newscast or film clip from Orlando can catch us by surprise, acting as a trigger, and it’s as if we’re confronted not only with traumatic […]

Valarie Molaison: Supporting Grieving Families for the Long Haul

Posted on June 12, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

Right after someone passes is often the most difficult period. Dr. Heidi Horsley interviews Dr. Valarie Molaison about how to handle this time, and what you can do to help support grieving families. Dr. Molaison is the clinical director at Supporting Kids in Delaware. Dr. Horsley points out that society gives people a lot of ideas on how to provide support in immediate situations, such as when planning a memorial. However, what kind of support does a family want afterward? Isolation and abandonment are common feelings after the rituals are gone. People don’t know what to do, and this feeling […]

Father’s Day After Your Father Has Died

Posted on June 11, 2016 - by Neil Chethik

It’s Father’s Day, and for more than 100 million Americans whose fathers have died, it will be a day of missing Dad. What can these fatherless Americans do to make the holiday meaningful? For my book, FatherLoss, I interviewed several hundred people about the death of their dads. And some were actually a little relieved on Father’s Day after their dad had died. This was especially true if they had a troubled relationship with their dad. After he died, they didn’t have to come up with a gift for him, or send him a card – or apologize for not […]

Henya Shanun-Klein: Parental Bereavement

Posted on June 10, 2016 - by Jessica Tyner Mehta

In 1989, Henya Shanun-Klein lost her daughter, Gili, who was killed by a reckless driver. Her daughter was only eleven years old at the time. Shanun-Klein shares her story with the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) to help others who are grieving the loss of a child. Now the director of thanatology at Haifa University, Dr. Shanun-Klein has dedicated her life to studying the bereavement field. She founded the program at the university in honor of her daughter. She’s also in the process of founding an organization in Israel to further honor her daughter. The author of Gili’s […]

Ted Bowman: The Hidden Losses

Posted on June 9, 2016 - by Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley

In this webisode of the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) organization, Ted Bowman joins the show to talk about different types of loss. Things rarely work out as planned. Dr. Gloria Horsley introduces Bowman as she asks about shattered dreams. “What are some of the factors around loss?” she asks. There are conspicuous losses, such as a death or a divorce. There are also internal losses that he calls shattered dreams or loss of dreams. It’s a “death” of what you expect life to be. You might be dealing with a death or a diagnosis, but you’re thinking, […]

Solomon R. Benatar: Living and Dying in Today’s Globalizing World

Posted on June 8, 2016 - by Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley

The Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) features Dr. Solomon Benatar discussing how living and dying has changed in a globalized world. At the Joint Centre for Bioethics, Dr. Benatar is revered as a leader in the industry. He also teaches at the University of Cape Town and the University of Toronto. What are the highlights of living and dying today? The conditions of humans are incredibly diverse. There have been great advances in technology and economical growths—but still, more than 50 percent of people live in horrific conditions without clean water or adequate food. Death can be a […]

‘Were You Two Close?’ Reflections on the Death of my Virtual Father

Posted on June 7, 2016 - by Heather Stang

When I was in my mid-20s, my mother married a charismatic photographer named Tom. He was the owner of a photography studio and son of a LIFE magazine photographer, and he and I connected on the subject of art and entrepreneurship. I was an art history major, and had just started my own business as a web developer. We hit it off quick. At the time, Tom seemed easy-going, and unlike my father’s new wife, Tom did not engage in a power struggle with me for my mother’s affection. This was a welcome relief, as my father’s new wife neurotically […]

Peter Hanlon: Bereavement Camp

Posted on June 6, 2016 - by Gloria Horsley

During an Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) conference, Dr. Gloria Horsley interviews Peter Hanlon, a registered nurse and bereavement specialist at HSE who manages bereavement camps. Based in Ireland, the camps began in 1995 for children only, but over time it was found that a family camp was necessary. Groups of families are brought together to learn about loss, coping, and healing. That same message needs to be spread throughout the family, not just with children, and bringing everyone together can help strengthen familial bonds. Four hours per day are dedicated to counseling, while the rest of the […]

Adult Sibling Loss

Posted on June 1, 2016 - by Brenda Marshall

Dr. Gloria Horsley interviews Dr. Brenda Marshall from Toronto, Canada. A management executive and executive coach, she’s completing her doctorate degree in adult education at the University of Toronto. Adult sibling loss is one of the most disenfranchised of losses. Suddenly, a few years ago, Marshall’s brother died. That was her “last day of normal.” Her world fell apart at that point. When she looked for support from the community, she found nothing for adult siblings—all sibling loss focus was on teens and children. There are many myths about losing a sibling as an adult, starting with the idea that […]