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forest for the trees

Posted on May 24, 2011 - by admin

Don’t lose sight of the big picture There’s a saying about not being able to see the forest for the trees. Grief to me sometimes can feel like that. You can’t see the future for the present and in this moment you are filled with the biggest sadness and emptiness humanly possible. Grief has somehow become my friend; after all we’ve been introduced four times. We’re practically on first name basis now. My first introduction to grief was my mother dying when I was 12. I am 26 now. It wasn’t expected, it was from nowhere, it was the blindside […]

Compassion Fatigue When Helping Others

Posted on May 24, 2011 - by Kim Go

Compassion fatigue is a term often applied to medical personnel providing support to those facing traumatic circumstances. This powerful term can be applied to numerous alternate settings. The setting that I would like to apply it to is the act of peer caregiving for the bereaved. There can be tremendous or hidden stress as a result of being engaged and involved with traumatized and grieving people. My aim is to help those who would like to develop endurance as peers in grief to create practical conditions to sustain an even level of support. First, know that what you do as […]

Keep Contact With Children Through Prayer Registry

Posted on May 23, 2011 - by Sheri Perl

I lost my son Danny on July 1, 2008, to an overdose of alcohol and prescription drugs. He was 22 years old, a beautiful mountain of a kid with his whole life ahead of him, gone in an instant due to an error in judgment. In the last two and a half years since that harrowing day in July when his father and I discovered him, I have been on a mission to find Danny through any means available to me. I am currently working on a book to share some of the roads I have explored in my search […]

It’s OK to Be Angry!

Posted on May 22, 2011 - by Maureen Hunter

I grew up in a house of emotionless beings. There was a scarcity of extreme reactions to anything. Emotions seemed to be secreted away inside ourselves and never allowed out to “play”. In the 60s, life revolved around the practicalities of living, not emotions. Teachers ruled with an iron fist. You learnt by rote and punishment. You spoke only when spoken to. You never talked back. You never showed emotion. You certainly never got angry. Imagine my surprise then with the onslaught of emotions that assailed me with the death of my son. Anger seeped out of my pores. It […]

you asked me to let go daddy, I miss you

Posted on May 21, 2011 - by admin

Im mad, Im sad, Im numb, I want my dad to call me and tell me everything is going to be ok. I never thought Id have to let go, I never understood how tired he really was, I hate myself for asking him to fight the cancer. I was so selfish and Im still being selfish, I want him back, I need my dad back. I feel like im going in circles, I want to tell him how much I love and miss him. Im drowing and I dont know how to let go.

Our Children are Always With Us in Spirit

Posted on May 21, 2011 - by Sandy Fox

I know for certain that we never lose the people we love, even to death. They continue to participate in every act, thought and decision we make. Their love leaves an indelible imprint in our memories. We find comfort in knowing that our lives have been enriched by having shared their love. Leo Buscaglia I happened to see this quote in a current issue of the online Compassionate Friends Newsletter. How true! How true it is! I think of how I can apply this quote to everything I have done since my daughter died. Every time I have to make […]

My Experience With Hospice Care

Posted on May 20, 2011 - by Paula Ezop

When the man that you have been married to for 35 years, and whom you love with all of your heart and soul, is gravely ill, you are numb and filled with heartache like you have never felt before. I went from a confident woman able to make important decisions to a woman who was lost, alone, and unsure of even the simplest thing. I no longer trusted my judgment – my world had been devastated, and I was emotionally and physically exhausted. So, when I was asked to make a decision about in-hospital hospice care for my husband, all […]

An incredible love

Posted on May 20, 2011 - by admin

It was 1991 when I first met Peggy, my surgical oncologist’s nurse. She was a small framed woman in her late forties, no taller than 5’2”. With every visit, she greeted me with a warm hug and an even warmer smile. Little did I know that behind that grace filled smile was a woman battling Hodgkin’s lymphoma and in the years to come, breast and skin cancer. Over the years, after my visits to the hospital ended, Peggy and I corresponded with yearly Christmas cards. It wasn’t until 2007 that I received a letter from Peggy informing me she wasn’t […]

Therapy is Working for this First-Timer

Posted on May 19, 2011 - by Michelle Gallucci

Spring is in the air, Easter and Passover have been celebrated with family and friends, but that special someone’s chair will be unoccupied. Having someone to talk to is the most important piece in healing. As for me, I’m a closed book. I rarely talk about my feelings; most of the time people come to me to solve their problems. Having a therapist when dealing with a loss is key to understand everything you are feeling or thinking. Picking a therapist is like picking a car; you have to have the right connection with them. I went through three therapists […]

Hospice Employee Experiences the Other Side

Posted on May 18, 2011 - by Deb Kosmer

For the past ten years, hospice has been a huge part of my life and its impact on me has been immense. I have worked all of that time in one agency as a hospice social worker or bereavement coordinator. I have been privileged to be a part of patients and families lives before the death and their families after the death. Every hospice experience is as unique as the individuals who are living it. Every family comes with its own unfinished business and differing opinions about what hospice and what dying is supposed to be. Regardless of similarities and […]