Im mad, Im sad, Im numb, I want my dad to call me and tell me everything is going to be ok. I never thought Id have to let go, I never understood how tired he really was, I hate myself for asking him to fight the cancer. I was so selfish and Im still being selfish, I want him back, I need my dad back. I feel like im going in circles, I want to tell him how much I love and miss him. Im drowing and I dont know how to let go.
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Hi Tammy, I am really sorry to hear that you have lost your Dad. I lost my Dad when I was very young too. It is ok to miss him but also remember that he loved you and would want you to be ok. I think that is is very important that you talk with an adult about your feelings, perhaps your Mom, grandparent, your church pastor or school counsellor. When you feel reallly sad, try to remember the special times with your Dad.
Bless your heart child. My heart breaks for you. In the best of situations you will go thru the guilt of having done something or not having done something. Guilt is there just because you love them. I (we) lost my daughter about 1 1/2 yrs ago. She was a wonderful Christian and for that I am so very, very thankful. She has 2 beautiful and wonderful children, a daughter 17 and a son 13. These two have been my source of moving ahead. Yet ,it is for them that my heart breaks even more. My daughter had the swine flu (h1n1) . We actually thought that she was going to make it. That was in Oct then her husband had to leave to go to reserves in Jan. I and my other daughter went to stay with the kids while he was gone. To see them press on helped me press on; however, I worry so much because my granddaughter doesn’t seem to talk to anyone about her mom. My grandson talks to a friend and he had some counseling at school. I wish I could tell you how to make it thru this, but I am stil trying to figure it out. All the words that people say with the best intentions don’t seem to help. A good ole hug can sometimes do the most. Being a mother I know that I would not want my family left broken,distraught or feeling guilty about something. Neither would your dad. Everytime that you manage to smile know that you are doing it for you dad.