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The Heart Remembers

Posted on May 12, 2011 - by Debra Reagan

In Loving Memory of My Son, Clint, 1885-2005 The heart remembers even when we aren’t actively thinking about our child. It was 51/2 years since our son had died of a drug overdose. The thoughts weren’t in front of my face all the time, and the weight wasn’t so heavy on my shoulders. I was finding the energy to re-invest into my new normal. We were planning a trip to the Grand Canyon. It would be a trip of a lifetime. We were visiting with family and hiking the canyon. My mind had been filled with preparations for the trip. […]

Orioles and Wood Ducks: Birds of Hope

Posted on May 11, 2011 - by Mary Westra

I never used to pay much attention to the birds. To me, they were just little brown blobs I’d notice from the corner of my eye while I was flitting to the garage, to the garbage can, or to the mailbox. A busy mom, I didn’t have time to stop and look. Then, when my kids were older, I went back to work and really jammed activity and purpose into every day. I’d catch up with the birds later when I had more time. Then my twenty-four year old son, Peter, was kicked to death by bouncers outside a club […]

Griefing for the loss of my wife

Posted on May 10, 2011 - by admin

My late wife Ely passed away on March 19 after a long illness suffering from Cardiomyopathy. We have been together for almost 30 years and have never separated. Since her death, I almost went to the graveyard to visit her everyday in spite of looking at the slideshow at home all day of all the beautiful photos including the ones she was in the casket at the funeral service. I was scared to go outside since the day she passed away other than going to the graveyard. I was so used to be with her all my life seeing the […]

Returning to the Hospital Stirs Fears, Hopes

Posted on May 10, 2011 - by Catherine Tidd

I recently experienced a personal milestone that may not seem like much to the outside world. But it’s something that I know other widows who are trying to navigate this road will understand. I went to a doctor’s appointment with someone I have been dating to find out whether he was really sick…or just in excruciating pain. The appointment wasn’t IN the hospital but it was in an office within a block of the hospital, an area I’ve avoided for the past 4 years, since my husband died. The good news is that the doctor believes that what they had […]

The Gift of Forgiveness for Mother’s and Father’s Day

Posted on May 8, 2011 - by Robin Edgar

For many, the Mother’s and Father’s Day tradition is a welcome way to celebrate the meaningful lessons your parents taught you by deed or example. For those who are estranged from parents, this can be a time of tension and unhappiness. It can also hinder the grief process when someone harbors unresolved issues with someone they have lost. Facilitating Love and Forgiveness Conversations for the Fetzer Institute, I saw time and again the far-reaching impact of the ability, or inability, to forgive. Fred Luskin, PhD, author of Forgive for Love, states, “If you are in a relationship that needs healing, the […]

Mums, Daughters and Mother’s Day

Posted on May 7, 2011 - by Diana Doyle

When I was growing up, I thought my mum was the most beautiful mother in the world! I would sit in our bathroom, cross-legged on a white fluffy stool and gaze at her as she applied her make-up. I was fascinated, watching her dip her cosmetic brush into the sink water, then she’d dab the brush into her charcoal Estee Lauder eye shadow and transform her deep set eyes into a picture of glamour. And when I got older, we’d share a glass of wine together in that same bathroom as we groomed ourselves, swapped clothes and talked about life. Mum never left the house without […]

Creating a Community of Grievers

Posted on May 7, 2011 - by Lauren Muscarella

It’s not what you say; it’s what you do. Every now and then, I smack my head for saying the dumbest thing. ”I should have said this not that,” I exult. Since I write http://mamaquest.org, a blog about losing my mother, and run http://trauma2art.com, a site about creative expression after loss, I should know exactly what to say when someone tells me about their experience in grieving. I don’t actually. We all experience something different even if the themes are the same. I have some standard phrases that I use when someone first loses a loved one. As a general […]

Mother’s Day Flowers Keep Showing Up

Posted on May 6, 2011 - by Vicky Bates

The Mother’s Day flowers still arrive every Saturday afternoon from the local florist shop. Before I had children, my mother always sent flowers to me because, she said, she wouldn’t be a mother without me. Years later, as another Mother’s Day approached, I had a baby to go with the day and planned an ocean-side stroll, followed by brunch. The temperature was around 72 degrees, the sun was shining and the birds were singing their little hearts out. We were a Hallmark card in motion. As my husband guided the stroller toward the outdoor café, our captivating Gap-attired baby began […]

A Sudden Truth: Living After the Death of Your Spouse

Posted on May 6, 2011 - by Carl Mathis

Losing a spouse is one of the most emotionally grueling experiences an adult can go through. The deafening emptiness of your home without your partner, the realization of dependency on your spouse, and the loss of everything that you once shared with—companionship, a friend, a person to turn to for advice—these are hard pills to swallow. For women, especially mothers, this is an unbelievably difficult change in their lives. Being suddenly left to raise the children alone and having to be the sole breadwinner for her now incomplete family is a hurdle many cannot fathom. As you grieve, however, you […]

Heaven Bound

Posted on May 6, 2011 - by Deborah Tornillo

Heaven Bound Year after year On your special day Mother’s Day I brought you flowers Gave you a hug and kiss Reminded you how special you were. Every one of those years I knew you were grateful For my gifts and my love Yet, a sadness remained In your beautiful blue eyes It remained throughout the years. I remember that dark day When we were told that Your only son, my only brother Was killed in war On Mother’s Day Body never recovered. But, this Mother’s Day I will rejoice for you, and Will no longer […]