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Skating for Her Mother

Posted on February 25, 2010 - by Pamela Gabbay

When most of us suffer a loss as great as that of a mother, we are left to grieve without the eyes of the world on us.  We do not have to temper our emotions because we are in the privacy of our own homes, surrounded by the comfort and warmth of our family and friends. This week as I watched the Olympic ice skating competition, I wondered how Canadian ice skater Joannie Rochette was going to be able to compete with the world watching.  Only a few days earlier, her mom died suddenly from a massive heart attack, just […]

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Healthy Grief Expression Can Happen in Many Forms

Posted on February 25, 2010 - by Alex James

Many who grieve find it difficult to express how they are feeling. As time passes, the opportunity to talk about their deceased loved one becomes less frequent whilst inside them the need to talk continues. Finding outlets for the feelings, and a way to communicate their experience to others, can be beneficial to the process of grief, and enable others to talk with them more openly. Here are some forms of grief expression: Art Not all of us are artistic, we may say, but what is art but expression? In my experience, art and using colour can enable expression of feeling […]

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Hope in Healing After a Mother’s Suicide

Posted on February 24, 2010 - by Nancy Rappaport

It was only in the sanctuary of Dr. Walter’s office that I began to feel safe enough to talk about my mother’s suicide. His voice was calming. It was a relief to talk openly with someone who would listen to my dread. As a troubled teenager, I was stealing things and acting out, and finally I ran away from home to, of all places, my all-girls school, where my principal found me in the morning. That was the last straw in my father’s mind, and he and my stepmother placed a call to Dr. Walter. By listening more than anyone […]

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Conflicting Feelings on Third Anniversary of Daughter’s Death

Posted on February 23, 2010 - by Harriet Hodgson

Today — February 23, 2010 – is third anniversary of my daughter’s death.  She died from the injuries she received in a car crash.  I have conflicting feelings: sorrow that will be with me always, and a sense of accomplishment about raising my grandchildren.  The instant we learned their father had died in another car crash, my husband and I told the twins they were coming home with us. Weeks later, the court appointed us as their legal guardians and fiscal conservators. Should I mention the third anniversary of their mother’s death to the twins?  Though they were sleepy when […]

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As You Grieve, Look for Sacred Moments

Posted on February 23, 2010 - by Harriet Hodgson

After my physician husband completed his tour of duty in Vietnam, the Air Force sent him to a base in Selma, Alabama.  He was the commander of the medical group.  My husband and I, and our two young daughters, lived in a converted barracks.  Each morning, dozens of maids would walk from town – a distance of about four miles – to clean houses on base, and then walk back to Selma. I couldn’t believe it. It was still dark when I heard a voice in the distance.  The woman was singing “My Lord What a Morning,” a famous African-American […]

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Great Movies Send Message that Joy Returns

Posted on February 22, 2010 - by Mitch Carmody

Oh……. we’re off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz …Those words and melody always bring to mind one of my favorite movies. Maybe it was gathering around the television with mismatched Tupperware bowls of popcorn and a cold bottle of Coke (my mother had her own “hands off” stash of Tab). We were dressed up for bed early, all snug in our jammies with pillows piled behind our heads and we would listen intently as Danny Kaye introduced us to the yearly ritual of the televised viewing of “The Wizard of Oz.” I love everything about the […]

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Poem: A Prayer of Hope

Posted on February 21, 2010 - by Deborah Tornillo

Today, I will take baby steps And, hold my head high With a prayer of hope for a smile. Today, I will give myself a hug And, accept that I am a human With a prayer of hope for forgiveness. Today, I will let go of yesterday And, accept that I did my best With a prayer of hope for joy. Today, I will lift my head up And, trust in my heavenly Lord With a prayer of hope for renewal. Today, is the first day of the rest of my life. Deborah Ann Tornillo Author, 36 Days Apart Copyright© […]

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Support Groups Can Help Those Bereaved by Suicide

Posted on February 21, 2010 - by Barbara Rubel

But I didn’t say goodbye! That’s all I could think about when I learned that my dad killed himself.  Friends said that he “was no longer in pain,” and that he loved me. But I didn’t say goodbye and those words weighed heavy on my grieving heart. Approximately 4.5 million Americans became bereaved by suicide in the last 25 years with 199,800 bereaved added in 2006 (AAS, 2009). Sadly, I became a part of that statistic in 1986 when my father killed himself while I was in the hospital awaiting the birth of my triplets. I personally found that attending […]

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Poem: It Hurts

Posted on February 20, 2010 - by Deborah Tornillo

Has it hurt me physically? Yes, it has. If I could do it all over again, would I? Yes, I would. Would I have let someone else do it? No, I couldn’t. Did I comfort you in your time of need? Yes, I did. Could I have done it better? Yes, I could have. Has it hurt me mentally? Yes, it has. Deborah Ann Tornillo Author, 36 Days Apart Copyright© 2010 http://www.deborahtornillo.com

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God Doesn’t ‘Zap’ Those Who Express Emotion

Posted on February 20, 2010 - by Kevin Quiles

In my twelve years as spiritual counselor, I have seen men and women choke back their feelings while simultaneously defending the Almighty who supposedly allowed the devastating events to take place. Unfortunately, both smothering of emotions and advocating for the divine have serious consequences. In this snippet of an article, I propose that emotional congestion in the name of God comes at an enormous price—freezing the flow of grief, relational complications, and an unfulfilled sense of self. An opposite course, namely, embracing all facets of emotional labor pains as part of a healing passageway, adds to personal and interpersonal growth. Contrary […]

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