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Baby Hoax Stemmed From Real-Life Grief and Loss

Posted on June 24, 2009 - by Monica Novak

By Monica Novak — As I walked into the house on a Friday morning, my husband, Al, handed me the front page of the Chicago Tribune. “I think you should read this,” he said. The headline story read, “Blogger’s baby a hoax.” An unmarried Chicago suburban woman named Beccah, also known as “April’s mom”, had been blogging for two months about her pregnancy with a terminally ill baby, gaining support from thousands of people nationwide who encouraged her to continue the pregnancy. By the time Beccah claimed to have given birth at home to a girl named April Rose who […]

The Race

Posted on June 23, 2009 - by Eric Tomei

As everyone knows by now, Father’s Day is the toughest day of the year for me. It is a constant reminder of how you really are different from someone else. Ever since my Dad died, my new tradition has been to run in the local Father’s Day 5k in my hometown which some of the proceeds are donated to the local YMCA. It is a great event and I did it by myself in 2006. In 2007 my mom and my sister came to cheer me on. In 2008 my brother-in -law, sister and friend […]

Loss During Young Adulthood May Make One Feel Old

Posted on June 23, 2009 - by Beryl Kaminsky

By Beryl Kaminsky — The young adult years — ranging from late teens to early thirties — span a period of life when most people are self-centered. Life is all about gaining independence, finding oneself, having a good time or starting relationships. Death is the farthest thing from a young person’s mind. As a result, when young adults lose a loved one, they often suddenly feel “old” and out of sync with peers who have not experienced significant losses. The depths of grief create feelings of aloneness and isolation, and “having fun” seems empty. Friends may want to help but, […]

Why Does Alzheimer’s Effect People Differently?

Posted on June 22, 2009 - by Carol O'Dell

Alzheimer’s does different things to different people. I’ve heard some people say their spouse or parent got sweeter. “Not my mother,” I say in return, laughing (and almost crying at the same time) at some of the antics my mother and I lived through. My mother had Parkinson’s and later, developed Alzheimer’s. Double whammy. Writing about our daily escapades in Mothering Mother helped me deal with the stress. Some people with Alzheimer’s are docile, too docile. They stop talking, and pretty much stop moving. And honestly, as hurtful and difficult as it is to have a feisty Alzheimer’s loved one, my […]

When Does Healing Begin? Watching For the Signs

Posted on June 22, 2009 - by Harriet Hodgson

By Harriet Hodgson — When you are in the throes of grief, you think you will never be happy again. Your world is a narrow, dark tunnel. You do not see any light, yet glimmers exist, and they are signs of healing. Watch for these signs, for they give you the courage to move forward with life. Healing begins when you feel a real smile. I did not smile after four loved ones died in the span of nine months. In fact, I forgot what a smile felt like. Then one day, I smiled a tentative smile, and it felt […]

Telling a Child About Two Deaths in One Day

Posted on June 22, 2009 - by Pamela Gabbay

By Pamela Gabbay, M.A., FT — My mind was simultaneously racing around in circles and dull as a knife. She’s only four… four. I could not fathom how I was going to tell my four-year-old daughter that her beloved grandmother, my mom, had just died. Her grandmother, who called her “my little Meg,” and lovingly sang “Somewhere Over the Rainbow to her;” her grandmother who swam with her and played hide and seek for hours. Four-year-olds don’t understand death. I don’t understand death. My mom was just 51. She had only been diagnosed with cancer two weeks ago and now […]

Return to Ensenada: A Father’s Journey Two Decades Later

Posted on June 21, 2009 - by Mitch Carmody

On December 1, 1987, life as I knew it ceased to exist. I watched helplessly as my 9-year-old son’s tired and cancer ravaged body slowly released his spirit. I saw his partially paralyzed face find its proper form and like the graceful arch of a feather, his smile returned once more. His half slit eyes, almost crusted closed, now yawned wide open; dark slate turned to brilliant blue, like forget-me-nots floating in a pool of cream. In the split seconds of my gasp, the soft glow went out and blue faded again back to gray, and although I knew I […]

Father’s Day and Mother’s Day: A Painful Struggle for Bereaved Parents

Posted on June 20, 2009 - by Cathi Lammert

By Cathi Lammert — Often times, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day are two of the most difficult days for bereaved parents. Some have told me that these days are so painful that they are not able to even acknowledge them for their own mom or dad, and they celebrate with their parents on a different day. Over the years, parents have looked at me with tear-filled eyes and asked me, “Am I really a parent if my baby is not here with me?” The answer, of course, is yes. I equate parenthood with love, the greatest kind of love. Does […]

Of Fathers and Faith

Posted on June 19, 2009 - by admin

Father’s Day is just ahead, and for more than 150 million Americans whose fathers have died, it will be a day of missing Dad. Father’s Day can be a traumatic day for those of us whose fathers who have died and the anticipation of the day is often as difficult – or even more difficult – than the holiday itself. Whether it’s been recent or many years since Dad passed away, we have to somehow get through the day as well as remember and honor Dad’s life. When John Pete ask me to write a blog on how my faith […]

A Stillborn Baby and the Fathers in Her Life

Posted on June 19, 2009 - by Monica Novak

By Monica Novak – When I was a child, I prided myself on making the best homemade cards to show my parents how important they were to me. Father’s Day was probably the Big Kahuna of card-making for me because in the eyes of this little girl, Daddy was king. He was the one whose side I sat by for all those workbench projects, eagerly waiting to hand over a tool. And he was the one whose shoulder I cried on during the disappointments and heartbreaks of life. Somehow, Dad was always able to make it feel better and bring […]