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‘Don’t Leave Me Here Without You’ – Why Caring For a Spouse is So Difficult

Posted on June 6, 2009 - by Carol O'Dell

By Carol O’Dell — For many of us, caregiving for a spouse is in our future. We like to not think about it, or at least imagine that it’s a long, long time from now. For many, it’s a daily reality. According to the Family Caregiving Alliance, there is a much higher likelihood of receiving care from a spouse than from an adult child. Nearly one-quarter (22%) of caregivers who are themselves 65+ are caring for a spouse. (Personally, I think it’s higher than that). And it’s not all the women who are doing the caregiving.  I know lots of […]

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GRIEF SUPPORT 101: How to Help a Bereaved Friend or Loved One

Posted on June 5, 2009 - by Monica Novak

By Fran Dorf – Thirty years after her son’s death, my friend still smarts when she remembers all the people who pointed out how lucky she was to have two other children. Another friend, whose brother recently died, grumbles that everyone keeps telling her it will get better with time. Another, whom I originally met in a grief support group, for years avoided anyone who hadn’t also lost a child. Having received my share of insensitive, even hurtful, comments after I lost my son, Michael, thirteen years ago, I certainly understand. Why do people so often say and do the […]

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Focusing on Sacredness of Life May Help Those Grieving

Posted on June 5, 2009 - by Harriet Hodgson

By Harriet Hodgson — Religion means different things to different people. When someone dies, it is common to turn to religion and spirituality for support. In 2007, four of my loved ones died in the span of nine months. I turned to my church and my inner self. Week after week, I sat quietly on the couch and thought about my loved ones and my life. If you are grieving now, I urge you to do the same thing. Quiet is essential to recovery. You will not make any progress until you organize your thoughts, center (focus) them, and heed […]

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How to Surrender to Grief

Posted on June 4, 2009 - by Louis LaGrand

By Louis LaGrand — “What you resist, persists.” It’s an old psychological saying that is especially applicable to anyone when mourning the death of a loved one. In other words, trying to repress feelings, “be strong” or pretend you are doing well when you are not, will guarantee that pain will spill out in unexpected ways. You will not only prolong the intensity of your grief process, you can be sure you will add loads of unnecessary suffering to legitimate pain and sadness. Grief is, contrary to popular belief, a normal human response.  It seeks expression when a person faces […]

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Open to Hope Writer Getting Book Published

Posted on June 3, 2009 - by admin

Open to Hope contributing writer Luellen Hoffman’s book, Special Dream, is being published this fall by Crossroads books. The book can be ordered now at www.Amazon.com. Special Dream, subtitled, “Personal Accounts After the Death of a Loved One,” explores the world of special dreams: clear, unforgettably vivid encounters with loved ones who have died. Her unique collection shares the personal stories of those who have experienced them, including the author herself, and reveals the distinct qualities surrounding this phenomenon. Luellen Hoffman is an adjunct professor at George Mason University and the recipient of the Chairman’s Award VNU/Nielsen Business Media for […]

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Grief Journaling: Don’t Let a Blank Page Scare You

Posted on June 3, 2009 - by Harriet Hodgson

By Harriet Hodgson — A blank journal page or computer screen can be intimidating. But this thought did not enter my head after my daughter and father-in-law died the same weekend. Journaling was the only way I could cope. It helped me cope then and continued to help me when my brother died eight weeks later and when my former son-in-law died a few months after that. Four losses in nine months made? journaling more important than ever. Bob Deits discusses journaling in his book, “Life After Loss.” Over time, you will see the importance of daily entries, he notes, […]

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Families Dealing With Loss

Posted on June 2, 2009 - by admin

Dr. Donna Schuurmann speaks about Families Dealing with Loss on Open to Hope TV

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Taking Care of Relationships After a Child’s Death

Posted on June 2, 2009 - by admin

by Lisa Buell Valentine’s Day is a day for lovers, a time to celebrate our passion for one another.  But what happens after our child has died?  Our innocence is lost and it takes every ounce of strength to be civil or even interested in what our partners are saying. What happens when our psychological energy is consumed with the memories of our child and it is taking everything we have just to get through the day? What happens when we can barely look at our spouse because it reminds us of the dream that was our life, a dream […]

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Coping as You Anticipate a Loss

Posted on June 2, 2009 - by Marty Tousley

By Marty Tousley, RN, MS, FT, DCC Grief does not wait for death to happen; it occurs both in anticipation of and following a loss. Extended illness, disability, severe accidental injury, a terminal diagnosis or the aging and decline of an elderly family member can produce what is known as anticipatory grief and mourning. We find ourselves reacting and continually adapting not only to an expected loss, but to all the losses – past, present, and future – that are encountered in that experience. Anticipatory mourning begins as soon as we become aware that death may happen. It begins when […]

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The Never-Ending Project

Posted on June 1, 2009 - by Eric Tomei

My Dad’s never ending project no matter what house we were living in was to clean the garage.  It did not matter how many times he cleaned it, the garage still looked like it needed to be clean.  Tools would be moved around, toys would be put away, lawn bags would be piled up but it still looked like that garage needed to be cleaned. My Dad saved everything or at least we thought he did.  He had hundreds of baby food jars filled with nails.  Some new, some old, most in pretty good condition.  There was a wheelbarrow from […]

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