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Poem: For Barbara, On Valentine’s Day, After the Death of Our Son

Posted on February 3, 2009 - by Mitch Carmody

By Mitch Carmody — Our son Kelly James was diagnosed with a brain tumor in February of 1986, and our world changed forever. We did everything we could do medically, holistically and spiritually to save our son. Although we experienced a healing, we learned a healing is not always a cure. He died 12-1-1987, two months later I wrote this poem to my wife on Valentine’s day. February 14th, 1988 For Barbara My darling I am not sure what to say nor even what to do to make this very special day unique and true to you. We have gone […]

Ode to a Shoebox: Celebrating the Love That Never Goes Away

Posted on February 2, 2009 - by Darcie Sims

By Darcie D. Sims, Ph.D., CHT, CT, GMS — I came across the perfect shoebox yesterday. It was just the right size. The sides weren’t caved in from having a pair of too-big shoes crammed into its depths, and it still had a good top on it. It was the perfect box! I could wrap it with red and white crepe paper and add a pretty bow, and everyone at school, on Valentine’s Day, would know whose box it was. And they would stuff it full. Too bad I found it now, 35 years after I left school! Ah well, […]

Poem: Catching Valentines

Posted on January 30, 2009 - by Genesse Gentry

Some of the nicest and most interesting people I know were born in February. So when she came on Groundhog Day I thought, Wow! How great is that! After her death, the huge shadow of sorrow that came with Punxsutawney Phil darkened our determined celebrations of her beautiful, but too short, life. But always, when we peered out and through our broken hearts we found signs that she was with us, birthday kisses on her special day. Now, as her birthday month approaches I know February may bring sorrow’s shadow, but mostly I wait, wide eyed and watchful to catch […]

Taking Care of Your Relationship After the Death of a Child

Posted on January 29, 2009 - by Lisa Buell

By Lisa Buell — Valentine’s Day is a day for lovers, a time to celebrate our passion for one another. But what happens after our child has died? Our innocence is lost and it takes every ounce of strength to be civil or even interested in what our partners are saying. What happens when our psychological energy is consumed with the memories of our child and it is taking everything we have just to get through the day? What happens when we can barely look at our spouse because it reminds us of the dream that was our life, a […]

Organ Donation and St. Valentine’s Hometown

Posted on January 28, 2009 - by Reg Green

By Reg Green — My memory of Valentine’s Day is spending it among the art treasures and history of St. Valentine’s birthplace, Terni, in central Italy. It was just a few months after our seven-year-old son, Nicholas, had been shot in a botched car-jacking attempt while we were driving to Sicily on vacation. We had donated his organs and corneas to seven Italians, four of them teenagers. The organizers of our visit wanted to honor the power of love and chose to see it in our story. The ceremony was held in a packed hall and, whenever Nicholas was mentioned, […]

‘I Buy Myself a Dozen Cream Roses’

Posted on January 26, 2009 - by Audrey Stringer

By Audrey Stringer — That first Valentine’s Day after Rhod died was very difficult for me. This had been our special day and now he was gone. He died on Feb 6, 1999 and eight days later it was Valentine’s Day! I was angry! I was sad. I was lonely. In our 30 years together, Rhod always showered me with gifts and little surprises. On one occasion, he gave me a toy shaped like a heart with diamond earrings attached to it. Every year, he gave me a gigantic card with beautiful words along with a beautiful bouquet of flowers […]

Husbands Respond Differently to Pregnancy Loss

Posted on January 26, 2009 - by Diana Gardner-Williams

By Diana Gardner-Williams – We never truly know how our partner will react when a baby or pregnancy has come to an end. Most likely our husbands will grieve and display sorrow in a different manner. After the stillbirth of our son Tanner, my husband felt the need to fix things by using his hands. He built beautiful stone benches, a pergola and hung a swing in Tanner’s memory gardens. Since men and women grieve differently, it is important to allow husbands to express their pain in a way that is comfortable for them. Not only was my husband grieving […]

Getting to Know Grief

Posted on January 25, 2009 - by Joy Johnson Brown

By Joy Johnson — Grief: the range of emotions or feelings we experience when someone we love dies. Grief is the price we pay for loving. If you are reading this, it’s likely you loved, and still love, someone special who has died. You are grieving, and knowing some things about grief lets you know you are not alone. o Everyone in the world grieves. o Everyone in the world also does it differently. o And most people grieve in four ways. Physically – Our bodies grieve. As my father lay dying, my Aunt Ada hurried out to the restroom. […]

Remembrances on the Anniversary of a Death

Posted on January 24, 2009 - by Eric Tomei

For any of you who have experienced a loss of any kind, the anniversary of that loss is sometimes one of the hardest days of the year to get through. It brings back good memories, bad memories and everything in between. For all of you loyal readers out there, that time is here for me once again. January 29th marks the 3rd anniversary of my Dad dying from an unexpected heart attack. So much has happened in those three years. So many things have stayed the same, and yet so many things are different. […]

Organ Donation Can Ease Pain of Child-Loss

Posted on January 24, 2009 - by Sandy Fox

by Sandy Fox Thanks to a cornea transplant, Jason was able to see again for the first time in 31 years; at the age of 39, a kidney transplant saved David’s life; for Richard, a bone transplant meant the chance to live a normal life again; and when Darcy’s son gets older, she’ll tell him about the transplant that saved her life. All of these are examples of people who received organ donations. In my book, one of the stories I wrote about is the death of two children in the same family from a car accident and the donation […]