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Do you want to read stories of others who have been where you are? Are you looking for bereavement help, and advice? Look no further. We offer over 7,000 articles written by our Open to Hope authors.

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Creating a New Identity

Posted on October 10, 2020 - by Susan Berger

This is an excerpt from The Five Ways We Grieve, by Susan Berger, available at Barnes & Noble and Amazon: Confronting the reality of having to live a changed life requires that you accept that your view of the world will change. Your loved one is gone physically. Psychologically, your sense of identity, security and safety are gone. Socially, relationships with friends and family may change. Spiritually, you may feel abandoned by God and isolated from others. Not knowing  who you are or where to go next, you are now faced with the most challenging task of all—creating a new identity […]

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Fear Comes From Loneliness; Don’t Grieve Alone

Posted on October 8, 2020 - by Susan Berger

This is an excerpt from The Five Ways We Grieve, available at Barnes & Noble, and Amazon: When we lose a loved one, fear is one of the strongest emotions we feel. Fear for our safety and our basic security,  fear about what will happen to us and our family.  Fear of not being able to manage our responsibilities on our own.  Fear of being alone. When we feel connected to others and to the universe,  however, we will not feel fear because, as Borysenko tells us:  “Fear cannot exist where there is connectedness because the core of fear is isolation.” So […]

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Replenishing Through Grief

Posted on October 6, 2020 - by Ruth Field

This is an excerpt from The 4 Facets of Grief: Heal Your Heart, Rebuild Your World, and Find New Pathways To Joy, which is available at http://www.amazon.com/dp/B073ZMKKH2. Is Self-Care Selfish? Let’s look at the word “selfish.” It has a negative connotation of someone who only cares about him- or herself. But what if we thought of the Self (with a capital S) as the essential part of our being that distinguishes us from others. Pretty special, huh? I’m not advocating narcissism or not caring about others; I’m just allowing for reasonable ways to cherish and nurture the unique human that each of […]

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Telling-Your-Child-About-a-Death

Meaning Making

Posted on October 6, 2020 - by Ruth Field

This is an excerpt from The 4 Facets of Grief: Heal Your Heart, Rebuild Your World, and Find New Pathways To Joy, which is available at http://www.amazon.com/dp/B073ZMKKH2.   Meaning Making   When I use the term “meaning-making,” I’m talking about the process of understanding or making sense of what’s going on in our lives. Many times the meaning of an event seems obviously unquestionable. In the case of bereavement, however, we are often left feeling empty because our dear one’s death will never make sense.   Finding meaning in distress can be like turning on a light bulb in a […]

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Adapting to a New Reality: Taking ‘Grief Breaks’

Posted on October 2, 2020 - by Ruth Field

This is an excerpt from The 4 Facets of Grief: Heal Your Heart, Rebuild Your World, and Find New Pathways To Joy, which is available at http://www.amazon.com/dp/B073ZMKKH2   Keep Learning Our brains crave information and order. It’s natural to long for as much detail as possible about your particular situation, its effects, and how you’re coping. What specifics do you know about what happened? Who might be responsible? How will you go on? Could it have been avoided or prevented? If so, how? These are hard questions to ponder, and they come up whether we want them to or not. Just know this is […]

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Accepting the Unacceptable

Posted on September 30, 2020 - by Ruth Field

This is an excerpt from The 4 Facets of Grief: Heal Your Heart, Rebuild Your World, and Find New Pathways To Joy, which is available at http://www.amazon.com/dp/B073ZMKKH2.   Defining Acceptance The first step is to figure out what acceptance really means. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, acceptance is the quality or state of being accepted or acceptable, as in approval. It further adds, acceptance can mean to endure without protest or reaction; to regard as proper, normal, or inevitable; to recognize as true. When my heart is screaming “NO!” and rejecting every aspect of a situation, what would it mean if […]

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Endings and Beginnings

Posted on September 27, 2020 - by Ruth Field

This is an excerpt from The 4 Facets of Grief: Heal Your Heart, Rebuild Your World, and Find New Pathways To Joy, which is available at http://www.amazon.com/dp/B073ZMKKH2.   I used to think life was a series of beginnings. Birth is a beginning; starting school is a beginning. So is learning to drive; new love; a new home. All these firsts take us toward presumably better and more fulfilling experiences. Beginnings are filled with hope, promise, and expectation. Sometimes they’re exhilarating and scary in the most positive way. But I honestly didn’t consider the possibility that they also may follow endings. At least, not until […]

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Soldier On: When Hope is Fading

Posted on September 25, 2020 - by James Sesnak

https://www.amazon.com/Soldier-James Sesnak/dp/1733872205/ref=sr_1_1?crid=28YNX3RJYSQO&dchild=1&keywords=soldier+on+sesnak&qid=1600520693&sprefix=soldier+on%2Caps%2C211&sr=8-1 “The pain I feel now is the happiness I had before. That’s the deal.” C.S.Lewis   C.S. Lewis’s memorable quote summarizes my life as I write these words. My thirty-year marriage ended when my wife succumbed to ovarian cancer. The initial surgery proved a success and the routine check-ups offered no cause for alarm. For many years the cancer simply remained a background noise and we lived as if nothing had happened. That abruptly changed when the last seven years of our life became a slow motion disaster. Cancer screamed in the background of every discussion but screeched even louder in […]

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Griefspotting Losses For a Post-COVID Era

Posted on September 25, 2020 - by Gloria Horsley

As we have gone from days to weeks to months dealing with the Covid epidemic, I have become increasingly concerned that our unresolved issues around grief and loss are mounting.  It occurs to me that it is not too early to address some of the issues that will plague us in the future by identifying them and intervening where we can in preparation for a postcovid world. I like to call this intervention Griefspotting. What, you may ask, is Griefspotting? Doesn’t it have something to do with Trainspotting and Heroin tracks?  Not in my world. When I was a kid, […]

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Excerpt from ROCK ON: Blessings in the Lessons

Posted on September 21, 2020 - by Susan Casey

This is an excerpt from Rock On: Mining for Joy in the Deep River of Sibling Grief, which is available https://www.amazon.com/Rock-Mining-River-Sibling-Grief/dp/1732888892/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2V353DVSRK5ZL&keywords=rock+on+mining+for+joy+in+the+deep+river+of+grief&qid=1576002958&sprefix=Rock+On%3A+Mining+for+%2Caps%2C155&sr=8-1 Chapter 10: Blessings in the Lessons Sisters Yvon Stokkink and Marissa Kerkdijk: interviewed in June 2015, Holland Mattijs Kerkdijk: 5/17/82-9/7/14 Cause of death: Suicide The day before his mother’s birthday, Mattijs received a text from his sister Yvon, who offered to pick him up the following day and bring him to his mother’s birthday party. My back is killing me, he texted back. Oh, I’m so sorry to hear that, and I hope you feel better, Yvon wrote. I […]

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