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Steve Roberts: Finding Forgiveness and Community After the Death of a Child

Posted on September 23, 2018 - by Jessica Tyner Mehta

Steve Roberts and Open to Hope’s Executive Director, Dr. Heidi Horsley, became friend in 2006 when they met at The Compassionate Friends. Professionally, Roberts is a bank consultant, but his experience with grief dates back to 2005 when he lost his daughter. “Kelsey was 11 years old, she was killed at her home by her mother, and so my life completely changed as of August 5, 2005.” Roberts started attending The Compassionate Friends support groups in Dallas, and then became involved as a steering committee member. The upcoming July 2015 The Compassionate Friends national conference will be held in […]

Don’t the Dead Take their Time Leaving?

Posted on September 23, 2018 - by Heidi Gessner

After my father died, I became fascinated about where he went. Someone came to take his body out of our house and to a funeral home. He was cremated and his remains were put into an urn. But he was gone. Gone where? Where was the essence of him? I remember my siblings, mother and I all gathered around his hospital bed in our den. His yellow face dropped to the side as he took one last sucking inhalation. We waited for another one, but it didn’t come. His mouth was still partly open. One thing I knew—he was no […]

Why Do Therapists Warn the Bereaved that they Will Divorce?

Posted on September 22, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

Dr. Gloria Horsley responds: You got me. I have been a therapist for many years and have repeatedly been told that, parents who lose children divorce. Let’s see, Phil and I have been married for over forty years and it has been over twenty since our son was killed. Memories of our dear Scott seem to bring us closer rather than driving us apart. That is not to say we didn’t have our down times. I remember on Scott’s eighteenth birthday, I had a pizza party for all of his friends.? I had about twenty kids in the house and […]

Hospice and Healing: Interview with Anne Baker

Posted on September 18, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Anne Baker about healing and helping through hospice. Anne’s losses started early, when she was just 7 years old her mother died suddenly. Just three years later, Anne’s little sister died. At that point in Anne’s life, there was no outlet for her to share her loss with others who have gone through the same thing. After two significant losses in her life, Anne went on to become a volunteer for Hospice Caring, which is a non-medical, volunteer-based hospice in Montgomery, Maryland. Anne is now one of […]

Last Words With

Posted on September 16, 2018 - by Yvonne Lancaster

Coming home was a tough time of day. It signaled the end of the occupational work day, and the beginning of the personal work evening…preparing dinner, doing laundry, taxiing kids, whatever else kept me going until 11 p.m. My 5 p.m. homecoming blues had often been softened by seeing my oldest son Brian’s familiar dark blue Chevy Citation sitting in the driveway. His bumper stickers read: “Free the Beaches” and “Save the Whales.” My heart was always warmed to know I’d raised a son who was a caring person. As I deftly balanced grocery bags, a trick I’ve learned over the […]

Critical Care Family and Staff Support: Interview with Sue Gammill

Posted on September 15, 2018 - by Gloria Horsley

At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Sue Gammill about her work with families of patients being a liaison between physicians and families. Sue has always believed that how we handle death in health care is important to the survivors. Sue works in the pediatric intensive care unit in Atlanta, Georgia and she believe they could be doing a better job. So what Sue did was write a proposal that she called “My Dream Job”. Sue explains more about the role she created for herself in the video below. Here are some key takeaways […]

Shame and Grief: Interview with Jeffrey Kauffman

Posted on September 13, 2018 - by Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley

At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Jeffrey Kauffman about shame after grief and how complicated grief can be the result of the shame. Jeffrey is the author of a book called “The Shame Of Death, Grief, and Trauma.” Shame is a topic a lot of people shy away from, but the truth is there’s a lot of shame involved in grief. In the video below, Jeffrey explains how we can move through the shame and heal. Here are some key takeaways from the video: Shame is the biggest hidden emotional factor is people’s […]

Willingness in Grief

Posted on September 11, 2018 - by Nina Impala

Willingness means the state of being prepared to do something, readiness. But here’s the thing you may not have been ready for a loved one dying. Your mind will ask the incessant questions… Why now? Is that time predicted? Do we have a destiny? Why did God let my family member pass away? I miss them so much, did they go to heaven? Are we ever ready for the death of a loved one? Let that hang in the air for a second or two. Old or young, terminal or not. It seems like our human brains are not equipped […]

Grief: A More Peaceful Definition

Posted on September 11, 2018 - by Mike Russell

The word “grief” brings the impression of negativity, like when you are supposed to act, feel or think a certain way. This continues through the time line that is created by other’s thoughts around us that have lost someone. It is almost like grievers are the ones being directed on stage by an unknown force. But my contention is that grief would be much better explained by the phrase, “moments of remembrance.” Think about it, we would no longer be caught in the trap of society’s control-conscious, albeit good intentions, of the word grief. Moments of remembrance completely frees us […]

Expressive Arts to Heal from Grief: Interview with Brianne Overton

Posted on September 11, 2018 - by Heidi Horsley

At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Brianne Overton about using the healing arts to help people cope with grief. In the video below, Brianne discusses healing/expressive arts and how they can help you get through the grieving process. Here are some key takeaways from the video: Drawing, writing, poetry, storyboards, and music can all be used as healing arts. Anything that allows you to express yourself creatively. When it comes to storyboards, you start off with just a blank piece of paper folded into 4’s or 6’s. From there, draw a picture in one […]