I will never forget how difficult it was to get through all the special occasions after my husband died. There were just so many “firsts,” whether it was Thanksgiving, Christmas, new babies being born, and Memorial Day. Whatever the occasion was, it was hard. What I learned from that was you just have to do what you need to do to get yourself through it.

For example, it had been our Memorial Day tradition to drive 50 miles to the cemetery where my husband’s family graves were. We did that every single year, rain or shine, but on that first Memorial Day after his passing, I couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t go, so I decided to leave town. I went and visited my son in GA, and that was my excuse for not being there when they had the gun salute and played taps over his grave. I was there in my heart, of course, but on that particular holiday the only way I could deal with it was by being 1500 miles away.

Little by little, I began to understand you just have to do what you need to do to work through those difficult occasions. It is part of the healing process, part of learning to accept what is, what we cannot change. How that happens will be different for all of us. There is no right or wrong. The only constant is we always have a choice in how we do it, and that is as it should be.

It’s been almost twenty years now since Neal’s passing, and almost that long since I lost my parents. I’ve “picked up the pieces and moved on,” as the old expression goes, yet even now, even when I think I’ve “dealt with it,” every great once in a while, something comes along and the floodgate opens.

So I don’t know if we ever truly “bring closure” to such a loss. But this much I can promise – eventually we do reach the point where our loss become less consuming and we are able to more easily move on with our lives.

Donna Miesbach

Donna Miesbach

I have been on a spiritual path all my life. I was first introduced to meditation when I was seventeen. I knew this was an important tool, but I wanted to go deeper than that particular method allowed, so my search began. I attended workshops and classes, read books and tried every form of meditation I could find, to no avail. Then in 1994, my life changed dramatically. My husband died very suddenly. Soon after that, I lost both parents, too. They say when the student is ready, the teacher appears. This student was certainly ready. About a year after my husband’s sudden death, I learned about Dr. Deepak Chopra and his teachings. It was like finding the light at the end of the tunnel. I took meditation training from Dr. Chopra and began attending his courses. They fed my deep roots and made such a difference in my life that I committed to being certified both in meditation and yoga so I could share these wonderful practices with others. I have studied with Deepak and also Roger Gabriel both here and in India. I also studied sound healing with Jonathan Goldman, and remote viewing with Dr. David Morehouse, having completed all five levels of his training. As my teaching became established, doors began opening that allowed me to teach meditation to at risk youth. Then another door opened and I found myself working with Playmakers Mentoring Foundation, a Sacramento-based outreach. Together with their Executive Director, we wrote a book and then opened a chapter here in Omaha. In addition to my work with Playmakers, I continue to teach meditation in the Omaha NE area, offering both private and group instruction. I also hold group meditations and programs five times a year, and speak to groups on various aspects of spirituality upon request.   It has been an amazing journey, one I never could have anticipated. I didn’t know it then, but I know now that it is possible to get to the other side of grief, and that is what my book, “From Grief to Joy, A Journey Back to Life & Living,” is all about.

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