Grief is part of the human experience; however, the grief of daughters whose mothers have died is particularly significant, especially for older women who were often caretakers during their mother’s end of life. The components of grief differ widely, and you are the expert on how to navigate this challenging yet sacred journey. It is important as part of this difficult and often lifelong journey to understand that grief is not limited to ordinary dimensions and that the metaphysical dimension that may often occur after a loved one has passed away may include inner knowing, visions, and dreams. Often, grievers are fearful about discussing this phenomenon with their family, friends, and even healthcare providers, yet by doing so, you can add to their grief wisdom.
I wrote The Eternal Bond: Daughters Honor their Mothers on the Otherside to help empower grievers and to share potent narratives that daughters have shared with me. It takes courage to talk about these occurrences, and I urge you to consider before you discuss your experiences to choose to share these miracles with people that you trust. It doesn’t make a difference if they believe you or not, since you are the expert in your own grief journey. I believe that this metaphysical dimension is more available after the passing of a loved one, however, I have had visions, dreams and signs from my mother over a decade after she has passed away. If more people shared their stories, then I believe that a taboo can be lifted and these magical occurrences can be validated. In fact, it is very common to have these visions according to research, yet the belief that somehow if you shared this information, you might be labeled ‘crazy’, persists. Of course, if you feel that you cannot function, or that these experiences are upsetting to you, please seek out a trusted therapist or physician for help.
I would also like to remind you that the metaphysical dimension does not always arrive because you want it too and it is not something you can command. These dreams, signs, and inner knowing are present when they are present and although you can cultivate a dream healing process, to help curry a dream of your loved, one, it may not show up immediately but in my experience, these signs and dreams do take place, and often when you least expect it.
Often, after a loved one has died, there is a yearning of course to reconnect with your loved one and you may be tempted to seek out a medium or a psychic for further information. If you do decide to have a reading with someone, I would urge you to wait at least six months after your loved one has passed away when you are feeling less vulnerable. Although, there are many mediums and psychics who only have the best of intentions, some people take advantage of their clients by promising that only they can relay information about your loved one and they may even urge you to purchase a number of sessions which of course, is unethical. As a psychic myself, I know that you cannot promise to be privy to the spirit world, much less the world where your loved one resides, because it is not up to you or to them. The person who has passed will decide how and when they wish to appear to you, since it is a relationship, and in any relationship, both people provide input. Beware of psychics or mediums who try to convince you that their information is correct, even when your inner knowing tells you that is not the case. I remember having a psychic consultation with someone who insisted that my mother was wearing couture fashion, which she loved. When I heard that, I laughed since my mother always dressed well, but couture would never be something she would choose -she didn’t believe in spending a lot of money on clothing. Ask for referrals from friends, and you may want to arrange for an initial call with a psychic to see if you are both aligned. After your reading, ask yourself if you feel relieved. Inspired? Or did it upset you? The visceral reactions will give you clues since your body never lies.
I was also told that I needed to ‘let go’ of my mother and that she was on her own journey, and basically, I was on my own. Of course, this was not what I wanted to hear because my bond with my mother was strong and I could not imagine then, or now, why she would abandon me for all time. Instead, I suggest that you ‘let in’, your loved one and find ways to incorporate her/him into your life. For example, reading the books she loved, keeping photographs around you, talking to them about your day, and having an intentional dream or meditation practice can not only be helpful, it is healing. I wear the necklace that my mother bought me of the Virgin of Guadalupe with the inscription, ‘You got me!’ every day. I have survived profound grief, and I know that once our psychic and somatic consciousness is shattered, often out of the ordinary occurrences take place. This is a spiritual opportunity to align with Divine forces, particularly with the loved one you have lost and the mystical and sacred communion that can take place is beautiful. The grief journey is a personal mystical initiation.
After interviewing countless women about their experiences in grief (and conducting a research study), I was heartened to hear that I was not the only one who experienced visions, signs, and dreams about her. I saw blazing neon lights for over a year in my apartment and was also shown depictions of the other side, which words do not adequately explain. The women I spoke with were eager to share their experiences with me, although they usually introduced the topic with the words, “Please don’t think I am crazy.” I am appreciative of their willingness to share their metaphysical occurrences and below I have documented some of their comments.
In the book, daughters shared their experiences of the metaphysical dimension, and you may have had similar experiences. Grief is not pathological and is a wound, and like any wound, it leaves a scar, but remember that you are more than your grief. When we are willing to share our stories with others, we can understand the many facets of grief since it is not a one-size-fits-all model. Grief can provide opportunities for self-reflection, insight, and inner knowing, and most importantly, death does not eradicate the eternal and enduring bonds of love between mother and daughter.
Have you experienced mystical experiences after your mother passed away?
#1. Dreams of my mom, and when I am in nature, I can feel her with me.
#2. Dreams and I often call out to her in my sleep.
#3. My radio went off, and when I asked for a sign a year later, the radio went off again. I believe it was her.
#4. Had a vision and she told me she was taken, and she was not ready.
#5. I feel her presence and a warmth comes over me. I have her walking stick, and I can feel her energy in my hand when I touch it.
#6. My daughter spoke with her when she was two years old.
#7. I felt her presence when I went to a religious park with my daughter.
#8. She shows up in dreams, and I pay close attention to nature, and I can feel her all around me.
#9. She had a near-death experience and said she was blissfully happy.
#10: Songs on the radio would magically come on like clockwork. Recurring dreams.
My dear friend , Jane Grossenbacher, sent me a letter after my mother passed away when I was acutely suffering. Jane has lost her mother when she was younger and I knew she would understand. She wrote:
Wear some of her jewelry. Be your magnificent self and she will tag along in your bones or in an expression or when and where you smile. Make a ritual and lay down her burdens, acknowledge her sufferings and make them disappear. You will imagine the best way to go to the next avenue, in the same world.
I often reach for her letter in my desk . I hope that her words can also help you when you are in need.
Grieving is a form of prayer-a prayer to be retrieved from the land of sorrows, and a prayer to reunite with our loved ones. Grief is a voyage to the underworld and possesses many gems of wisdom. However, these insights cannot be told or taught; they must be felt and experienced. This process can last a lifetime but also possesses various degrees of power-sometimes it will feel shattering and frightening and other times quiet and bittersweet. I cannot tell you that it has an endpoint, but although it never truly ends, it changes as the sting of grief transforms into grace. I believe that the most important component of the grief process is Faith. I am not referring to a particular religion or spiritual path. Depending on one’s religious or spiritual orientation, this faith can be comforting. However, I believe that Faith in yourself is key. Faith that you will be offered a connection with your loved one from their higher dimension can indeed take place, and when they are ready. I hope you have Faith that you will be able to continue your life with your loved one for grieving is fundamentally a courageous act . The bonds of love that you experience do not end, for they are eternal.
From The Eternal Bond by Janet Lynn Roseman, PhD. © 2025 by Janet Lynn Roseman, PhD. Used by permission from Llewellyn Worldwide, Ltd., www.Llewellyn.com.
This is so important. I work with grieving families through MyFarewelling and the number of people who whisper about signs they’ve received, afraid to be judged, is heartbreaking. One client told me her mother’s music box played on its own the night before the funeral. Another said she smelled her dad’s aftershave in an empty room six months later. These moments aren’t pathology. They’re love still finding a way through. Thank you for validating what so many grievers experience but are afraid to say out loud.
This really resonated. I work with grieving families through MyFarewelling and the number of people who quietly admit to sensing their loved one after death is much higher than most expect. One client told me she smelled her mother’s perfume in an empty room three months after she passed. She was embarrassed to mention it until I told her how common it is. Another woman said her father’s favorite song came on the radio at the exact moment she was about to sign the paperwork to sell his house. She took it as permission. I think the fear of being called crazy keeps so many people from talking about these moments, which only makes the grief lonelier. Thank you for giving this topic the respect it deserves.
Thank you for writing about this so openly. The fear of being labeled “crazy” keeps so many grieving people silent about experiences that are actually deeply healing.
I work in grief support and clients tell me about these moments all the time, always prefaced with that same nervous qualifier. A woman I worked with kept smelling her late husband’s aftershave in their kitchen months after he passed. She thought she was losing her mind until she read that scent-based experiences are among the most commonly reported. Another client heard her mother’s laugh clearly in a crowded restaurant. Not imagined it, heard it. She described it as both devastating and comforting at once.
At MyFarewelling we encourage people to write these experiences down. Not to analyze them, just to honor them. Some of the most beautiful memorial tributes I’ve read include these small supernatural moments alongside the everyday memories. They become part of the story of that relationship continuing beyond death.
Your point about choosing trusted people to share with is so important. These experiences deserve witnesses who won’t diminish them.