The Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) features Joy Berger talking about the impact music and composition has made in her life. The founder of Composing Life, Berger is an advocate of using music to heal. She wrote Music of the Soul: Composing Life Out of Loss to help others use music in their own healing journey. Music has always been central to her life, whether it was dancing ballet, performing in an orchestra, or learning Bach on the piano. She pursued a doctorate in music, but a sudden injury to her hand put a brief halt to her life.

Berger was passionate about finding a new way to play. It helped her move through mourning in her life, and also showed her many other avenues. Memorialize your loss, she urges. Create playlists and collect music that helps you commemorate the life of a loved one who’s passed. Berger created CD and DVD sets when her father died, and sharing it with others was part of her grief journey.

A Musical Journey

Identify what music taps into your comfort, joy, hope, or sadness needs. Always keep it close by so you can rely on it easily. Understand what music makes you feel. What emotions does it bring up? If the music brings up too much emotion, you can turn it off. If it’s helping, you can turn it up. You’re in control of the music in your life, and that’s a great thing for the bereaved.

You don’t need to be a professional musician like Berger to benefit from music—you don’t even need to sing or play an instrument! Listening to music can be an active form of participation. There’s no limit to what music can do to help you heal.

 

Heidi Horsley

Dr. Heidi Horsley is an international grief expert, licensed psychologist, and social worker. She is the Executive Director and Co-Founder of the Open to Hope Foundation, one of the largest internet grief resources, with over 2 million yearly visitors. She hosts the award-winning Open to Hope cable television show and podcast. Dr. Heidi is an adjunct professor at Columbia University. She serves on the ​National Board of Directors for The Compassionate Friends, the largest peer to peer support organization in the world. She also serves on the National Advisory Board for the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS). TAPS has served over 50,000 military families who have suffered a loss. In addition, she serves on the National Advisory Board for the Elisabeth Kubler-Ross Foundation, and the Children's Brain Tumor Foundation. Dr. Heidi is on the VIP section of Marquis Who's Who in America, Madison Who's Who, and Who's Who of American Women. Dr. Heidi has co-authored eight books, including; Spouse Loss; Fresh Grief; Inspirational Stories for Handling the Holidays After Loss; Inspirational Stories of Healing After Loss; Real Men Do Cry; A Quarterbacks Inspiring Story of Tackling Depression & Surviving Suicide; Teen Grief Relief: Parenting with Understanding Support and Guidance; and Signs and Hope From Heaven. She has appeared on the ABC television show 20/20, has been interviewed by numerous media outlets, and has been a guest on hundreds of radio shows as well as quoted in dozens of media publications, including the Metro World News, Washington Post, Time Magazine, Newsday, Money Magazine, and New York Daily News. Dr. Heidi is also the author of numerous articles and academic book chapters. Dr. Heidi gives keynotes, presentations, and workshops throughout the country, and teaches continuing education workshops for health care professionals on support following trauma and tragedy. For 10 yrs., Dr. Heidi worked as a co-investigator for the FDNY-Columbia University Family Guidance Program; a study which looked at traumatic loss in families of firefighters killed in the 9/11 World Trade Center attacks. Through this 9/11 study, Dr. Heidi provided ongoing intervention and follow-up to firefighter widows and their children, and facilitated groups for bereaved siblings. In addition, Dr. Heidi supervised the school social work staff at Harlem Democracy Charter Schools in NYC for four years. Dr. Heidi's early career included work in a variety of clinical settings, including; Manhattan Psychiatric Center, California Pacific Medical Center Psychiatry Dept., University of San Francisco Mental Health Clinic, St. Lukes-Roosevelt Hospital Psychiatry Dept., and Hope Haven Residential Treatment Center in New Orleans. Her doctoral dissertation was on the sudden death of a sibling. Her academic credentials include a doctorate in Psychology (PsyD) from the University of San Francisco; a Masters degree in social work (LMSW) from Columbia University, and a Masters degree in mental health counseling (MS) from Loyola University, in New Orleans. Dr. Heidi splits her time between NYC and Tucson AZ.

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