Let’s talk about the mysteries of death, because in death there always seems to be so many unanswered questions.  I know with my own mom, who has been gone eight years now, the one question still remains: Why did she have to die? Breast cancer took her life. She was too young, a vibrant, good-hearted woman. It still is a mystery to me.

People often ask me questions about whether their loved one is OK, whether they can see us, feel us, suffer or be scared. They want to know: How long does it take to reach heaven? Was someone there to greet them? Are they even greeted? To me, it’s all a mystery. The great mystery.

When I die someday, I will go straight to what I call endearingly, “The Celestial Committee” and say, “Hey! Why all the secrets? This life on earth can be hard enough, don’t you think it would be nice to know about the journey home and that are loved ones arrived safely?”

Our brains were not equipped to accept death. The right brain does its wondering and wandering, while the left brain dissects everything and tries relentlessly to find answers (usually in the middle of the night).  This is why we grieve. Maybe we would not grieve at all if we knew all the answers to these questions. Maybe grieving our loved ones is one of the many lessons we learn on earth. There are certain things we have to do on this earth: Pay taxes is one, and the other one is to grieve our loved ones. Both come with serious consequences if not attended to.

Helping people pass away is a gift that God has given me, which I have done for years. Ninety percent of the time, it does not make me sad. Occasionally, I get one that does.

My own parents, that’s different; nothing prepares one for that. But I have witnessed many times something that helps with the great mystery of death. From what I have witnessed, I believe that when a person dies, they receive the gifts of sight and hearing from heaven.

So many times I have heard family members say that their dying family member is in bed talking to people in the next life. I had a patient that I visited one day who told me I was an angel. I will never forget it because the room was kept dark so I could barely see her face. I am not sure what she was seeing but it was some kind of light she saw around me but was not visible to my own eyes. It made her feel peaceful.

I hope this brings you a little peace and validates your heart on how difficult it can be to understand death, and why our loved ones have to leave without us being able to escort them home.

Rest your weary heart. Have faith that your loved ones are okay, and truly know how loved you are on the journey of grief you are going through.

 

Nina Impala

NINA IMPALA is a highly intuitive multifaceted individual. This she combines with professional education in the End-of-Life Field. Certified by The American Academy of Bereavement for Spiritual Facilitation for the Terminally Ill, Nina also holds a BA in Human Services, is a graduate of Mueller College of Holistic Studies, Author of Dearly Departed What I Learned About Living From the Dying, and a Reiki Master Teacher. Currently she is the Bereavement Coordinator and Counselor for Gentiva Hospice in San Diego, California. For well over 19 years Nina has worked passionately in the hospice field using her gifts visiting the dying and educating families. In addition to working with hospice patients and their families Nina has also assisted families through tragic deaths. Nina works passionately helping them to understand that as much as we would like to have all the answer to the big questions accepting that we don't can be a big hurdle. Nina feels,finding peace in these situations is the greatest gift you can give to another human being. Nina lives in the San Diego area and can be reached at tutoringforthespirit@gmail.com

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