Dear Extended Family of Peter,
Christmas is over. We made it. Now we await his birthday, the anniversary of his death, other Christmases, wedding, other funerals. We sincerely thank you for your greetings and gifts though we did not send any to you this year.
You have asked what you can do to help us. As you know, grief does not end. You surely must miss him too. After all, you knew him when he was a babe in arms, had gangly legs and arms, funny teeth, stupid antics. You can help us by talking about Peter, with us or among yourselves, saying his name aloud, sharing any thoughts and memories (and dreams if you’ve been lucky enough to have them) that may creep into your daily life, at any time, month to month, this year or next. Peter is ever present in OUR minds, we will not forget him. You will NOT make us feel bad or sad if you mention him or his death. In fact, talking about him helps us enormously.
We realize Peter was no more special than your special loved ones. He was devilish and sometimes selfish, as well as generous and often fun. But he met a very tragic, untimely death, wholly undeserved, and we have months if not years ahead of us of court proceedings in which to try to seek some justice. Please feel free to ask questions.
Nothing will bring Peter back. But talking and sharing helps us remember him. And memories are all we have! We need you desperately. You are among our remaining special loved ones.
With loving gratitude, Mary and Mark