My name is Valérie Lamber, a self-published Belgian author of Greek origin. Now 58 years old, I share, through this book, the story that changed my life forever. It took me 26 years to find the strength to reopen the drawers of my memory and put into words the unimaginable.

After finishing my studies, I spent three months in Purley, England, as an au pair, fulfilling a lifelong dream of improving my English. I translated this book myself into English and Greek. As I am not a professional translator, there may still be a few imperfections. I simply hope that readers will welcome these editions with the same kindness, sincerity and humanity with which they were created.

Life Without a Manual – Living Without You is neither a guide nor a theoretical book about grief. It is a true and deeply personal story, written with love, honesty and courage.

I do not claim to have the answers, because everyone experiences grief differently. I simply share how I lived through mine, with my fears, doubts, guilt, mistakes, vulnerabilities, and the immense love I have for my children, who also had to grow up with the consequences of this trauma and, despite themselves, endure a mother who was sometimes overprotective and even suffocating. This is my story. It is not meant to tell anyone how to grieve, but simply to bear witness to the way I experienced my own grief.

If, through these pages, you feel understood, a little less alone, or simply listened to, then my book will have fulfilled its purpose.

You are not alone.

Lamber Valérie

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Valérie Lamber is a Belgian author of Greek origin who lives near Charleroi, in Belgium. She is the mother of three children. Her eldest son, Michael, was six and a half when he was knocked down by a car on his way to the school bus, twenty-six years ago. For many years, Valérie carried her grief mostly in silence. She went back to work, raised her two younger children, and built a life around an absence that never left her. It took her more than two decades to find the courage to put her story into words. In spring 2026, she published her memoir, Life Without a Manual – Living Without You, in English, French and Greek. Written in short, honest chapters, the book tells the story of life before Michael’s death, the day everything changed, and the long road towards learning to live again. It is not a guide or a method, but a true story written for bereaved parents and for the people who stand beside them. Since its publication, Valérie’s writing has been shared by bereavement organisations in the United Kingdom. The Compassionate Friends UK published her guest article “After the Loss of a Child, Life Continues, Without Instructions”, and The Loss Foundation published “The Backpack We Never Put Down”. Her book has also been featured in a Greek health and wellbeing magazine. Valérie does not write as a therapist or a grief expert, but as a mother. Her wish is simple: that parents who are at the beginning of this road feel a little less alone, and that the people around them understand a little better what they are living through. She believes that the love we have for our children does not end with their death. It changes shape, and it continues to walk with us. Outside of writing, Valérie works as an executive assistant.