Open to Hope Articles
Do you want to read stories of others who have been where you are? Are you looking for bereavement help, and advice? Look no further. We offer over 3,000 articles written by our Open to Hope authors.
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When We Remember Our Loved One, We Become Stronger
August 6, 2010
Sometimes remembering comes at a cost. Since my husband died, remembering is the hardest thing for me. Most days, I can go about my business and not think that this is my real life. Some days, I can just pretend I had a bad dream, a dream that I will awaken from and he will still be here with me. A dream that will end with me waking up and looking at the empty side of the bed and it’s not empty any more, there he is! He didn’t abandon me. He didn’t die. Remembering always comes with pain. It […]
Nine Years Later, She Savors Visits to ‘The Missing Place’
August 3, 2010
There are days and times and moments in between the larger slices of my life I find myself in the missing place. I have made incredible strides recreating myself after the death of my husband Gary. I learned to stand on my own two feet and have done so now for nearly a decade. I enjoy my independence and my freedom. I am accountable to no one but me. I choose every step in my path and every moment in my day. Yet there are the quiet times when a memory surfaces and I cannot help but go to that […]
Retail Therapy: How Widows Might Pull Us Out of the Recession
August 2, 2010
Let’s face it. We start spending the moment our loved one take his last breath. Wait a minute–we really start spending way before that. Most of us are the reason why our own personal physicians drive such nice cars. But if you think about it–our contribution to the healthcare industry is just the beginning. Once everything is done, we have the funeral to deal with. I’ve been to small funerals and elaborate ones, but, even on the small side, we usually spend at least a couple thousand dollars. You’ve got a casket or a seriously overpriced urn. You’ve got flowers […]
The Healing Power of Creativity
July 21, 2010
When my late husband and I first began dating, he set clear boundaries with regard to his time. Sundays during football season were off limits. He was an avid fan and pretty good at picking the spreads. Saturday mornings were dedicated to painting out on the back patio of his sparsely furnished West Hollywood apartment. So he was pleasantly surprised to find out that I loved football and I, too, had interests I wished to continue to nurture outside of our relationship. As our lives unfolded and we moved from dating to marriage, from a rental in West Hollywood to […]
Widow’s Separation From Husband is ‘Temporary’
July 20, 2010
This life is so temporary. We don’t seem to get that most times. Over the last months, it has become so clear to me that we are not meant for this earth forever. We are eternal beings with our hearts, souls and beings based in something bigger and better than this place that we walk in now. Ten months ago, my husband died. We are young (by my standards). He was 46. We just had our second child. I was banking on happily ever after. He truly was my prince charming. He is dead now and I am not. I […]
Lost in the Widowhood
July 18, 2010
“I feel so lost.” How many times have we felt that way? How many times have we heard that from other grievers? How many times have we just wanted to pull on a t-shirt that says it, so we just don’t have to explain anymore why we’re operating in such a daze? We all go through these periods of feeling lost. Like we’re floating out there in the world with nothing to anchor us. We make the best effort we can to find that connection–the internet, support groups, counseling–something, anything to make us feel like we’re still part of the […]
Dating for Widows: Now May be the Time to Cast Your Line
July 13, 2010
Dating after a spouse-loss is kind of like standing on a ledge with a bungee cord attached to you. You sweat, hoping that that bungee cord is gonna hold. You may be ready to take the plunge. Or you may take one look at the view (which looks just fine without the addition of our innards splattered below, thank you very much) and step away. Or, standing on the ledge, we may need a friendly push from a well-intentioned friend who we may be mad at while we’re swinging but once we’re on firm ground we’ll give them a big […]
Wife’s Sudden Death Sends Man on Faith Journey
July 11, 2010
I’ve been living without my wife for seven months now. I’ve had to adjust to a great many things, but the most trying has been my struggle with my faith over that time. I’ve been angry with God, which has consumed me at times. I’ve been angry with Kathy for dying, and I’ve been angry with myself for being pathetic. At first I was consumed by what I perceived as God’s punishment of me. Why would he take the love of my life from me? Why did he not take me instead? Those questions made me doubt everything I’d ever […]
Woman Sets Out to Complete Loved One’s Bucket List
July 4, 2010
My beloved partner Brian was a very young man when he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Doctors gave him an estimate of 6 – 12 months to live. As timing would have it, the movie “Bucket List” had come out a year before. This caused much discussion among visiting friends that Brian should make a bucket list. Brian seemed disinterested. He made two concrete, but modest requests – the procurement of a beautiful bathrobe and the commitment to keep up on his grooming. Brian was a fastidious man, and I made his requests happen. His friends talked of helping Brian […]
