We have been traveling this grief journey after the death of our son, Clint, for seven years. We didn’t know what to expect along the way for ourselves or for the marriage.
In the beginning, we stayed together because we had no energy to do otherwise. Then the suggestion was offered, to stay together because no one else could share the same memories of our son. This progressed to let’s stay together for our surviving son. We desperately wanted to be whole again for him.
Time continued and we found ourselves communicating more and rebuilding our lives. Time traveled forward and we ourselves were planning for our 30th wedding anniversary. We arrived at the restaurant and followed the hostess to our table. At the table were greeted with a placard that read, “Reagan-Party of Two”. The little note grew to be very important to us, almost a challenge. It set the goal of rebuilding our relationship. Even though it felt as though our family had become smaller, we could still have a good life.
Despite the emptiness, anger and pain of the early journey, we wanted to be together and even found love again.
Debra Reagan, in loving memory of our precious son, Clint Reagan.
Thank you Debra, for sharing your difficult journey. I can unfortunately relate very well to your story. My husband and I have been married for 29 years and 3 years ago our lives were changed forever, when we lost our oldest son, Rick. Yes, every day is still a struggle to get by and find any joy in life, but we also have a surviving son, and want to be here for our son, as much as we can.
I have read that many marriages often do not survive the tragedy of loosing a child, and it used to scare me. But, as time has gone by, I have found that the person to whom I can always turn to, and who can be the most understanding and the most comforting, is my husband. Because very often when I share my feelings with him, I realize that he also feels the same way.
In loving memory of my son, Rick Gil.
I am so sorry that you have experienced the death of your precious son, Rick Gil. In the early times of grief it is difficult to have the energy to help a mate or spouse, but marriages and relationships can survive the loss of a child. Three years is so recent. I hope you continue to take care of yourself. I will be holding you in my heart.
I am so sorry for your loss.I know how you feel because we too lost our son the only difference is that he was only2years.For a momment you think life has to end the pain is too much to bare.its so painful that only God knows your pain(if you are a christian).After sometime because its been3months since he passed I have only come to realise that he was there to serve a purpose only that it was a little too soon.with time you heal but will never forget him.our lord is a mighty God he restores all wounds .we should also count our blessings as well.I pray you be restored in the name of Jesus Amen…
Almost 34 years ago, cancer took away our only child, Rebecca, 4 weeks after her 17th Birthday. After her demised we went through very difficult and painful period but the death of our daughter brought us even closer together and ever since, we have been a shoulder to lean on throughout all this years. Last July, we celebrated our 51st Wedding Anniversary. We are convinced that our Christian Faith have been the mean source of our survival throughout our enormous grief.