The Response of Men After a Miscarriage with Stephanie Rose

At the annual ADEC (Association of Death Education and Counseling), I spoke with Stephanie Rose about men and miscarriage and the unacknowledged loss.

Men sometimes respond differently to miscarriages. Stephanie explains more about this in the video below.

Here are some key takeaways from the video:

  • Stephanie’s research suggests that men can experience an array of emotions after their wife has had a miscarriage, but those emotions often brushed under the rug.
  • When a man’s wife experiences a miscarriage, the man always gets asked “how is your wife doing?” vs. “how are you feeling?” A man’s feelings in this situation are not often considered, the focus is always on the woman.
  • Stephanie’s goal with her research is to help men have an outlet where they can talk to her.
  • Stephanie will be conducting interviews where men are welcomed to share their experience with her and be the focus of attention.
  • After a man’s wife has had a miscarriage, Stephanie explains that it’s important to ask him how he’s doing. It’s a simple gesture that would be well received.
  • There’s not a lot of information out there about men respond to miscarriage, but the research Stephanie has conducted so far shows that men do grieve after a miscarriage. With that said, Stephanie feels it’s important to continue exploring what the experience is like for them.

For more video interviews, please see the Open To Hope YouTube channel.

You can also view our response to a husband’s question of “when is it time to try again after miscarriage?

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Heidi Horsley

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Dr. Heidi Horsley is an international grief expert, licensed psychologist, and social worker. She is the Executive Director and Co-Founder of the Open to Hope Foundation, one of the largest internet grief resources, with over 2 million yearly visitors. She hosts the award-winning Open to Hope cable television show and podcast. Dr. Heidi is an adjunct professor at Columbia University. She serves on the ‚ÄčNational Board of Directors for The Compassionate Friends, the largest peer to peer support organization in the world. She also serves on the National Advisory Board for the Tragedy Assistance Program for Survivors (TAPS). TAPS has served over 50,000 military families who have suffered a loss. In addition, she serves on the National Advisory Board for the Elisabeth Kubler-Ross Foundation, and the Children's Brain Tumor Foundation. Dr. Heidi is on the VIP section of Marquis Who's Who in America, Madison Who's Who, and Who's Who of American Women. Dr. Heidi has co-authored eight books, including; Spouse Loss; Fresh Grief; Inspirational Stories for Handling the Holidays After Loss; Inspirational Stories of Healing After Loss; Real Men Do Cry; A Quarterbacks Inspiring Story of Tackling Depression & Surviving Suicide; Teen Grief Relief: Parenting with Understanding Support and Guidance; and Signs and Hope From Heaven. She has appeared on the ABC television show 20/20, has been interviewed by numerous media outlets, and has been a guest on hundreds of radio shows as well as quoted in dozens of media publications, including the Metro World News, Washington Post, Time Magazine, Newsday, Money Magazine, and New York Daily News. Dr. Heidi is also the author of numerous articles and academic book chapters. Dr. Heidi gives keynotes, presentations, and workshops throughout the country, and teaches continuing education workshops for health care professionals on support following trauma and tragedy. For 10 yrs., Dr. Heidi worked as a co-investigator for the FDNY-Columbia University Family Guidance Program; a study which looked at traumatic loss in families of firefighters killed in the 9/11 World Trade Center attacks. Through this 9/11 study, Dr. Heidi provided ongoing intervention and follow-up to firefighter widows and their children, and facilitated groups for bereaved siblings. In addition, Dr. Heidi supervised the school social work staff at Harlem Democracy Charter Schools in NYC for four years. Dr. Heidi's early career included work in a variety of clinical settings, including; Manhattan Psychiatric Center, California Pacific Medical Center Psychiatry Dept., University of San Francisco Mental Health Clinic, St. Lukes-Roosevelt Hospital Psychiatry Dept., and Hope Haven Residential Treatment Center in New Orleans. Her doctoral dissertation was on the sudden death of a sibling. Her academic credentials include a doctorate in Psychology (PsyD) from the University of San Francisco; a Masters degree in social work (LMSW) from Columbia University, and a Masters degree in mental health counseling (MS) from Loyola University, in New Orleans. Dr. Heidi splits her time between NYC and Tucson AZ.

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