I sat in the sunshine by the community pool and I overheard several sweet little voices call out, “Watch, Papa, watch.” This universal call of a child reminded me of all the times parents watch their children.

For mothers, this watching began the moment she found out about the pregnancy. She watched the foods she ate and she watched with a little nervousness for all the issues in the pregnancy books.

Then the precious child arrived and the watching intensified. She even found herself watching the child breathe as he slept. She continued to watch him as he grew.

The child grew older and sometimes she watched him struggle with adult issues. Things may not always have gone as we planned, but we continued to watch our child go forth in life.

We happily took on our tasks as parents and looked ahead to the day when we will one day be watching our grandchildren grow. Then in one horrible moment our world changed forever. Our child died. At first we felt that we no longer had a role in our child’s life.

Then the day arrived when we came to realize that our deceased child would always be a part of who we are. Things are different and we have a new normal, but the love continues and now we watch with our hearts. We watch for pennies, rainbows, birds, butterflies and signs of our forever connection.

Debra Reagan
In Loving Memory of Clint Reagan
March 30, 2014

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Debra Reagan

Debra Reagan lives in East Tennessee with her husband of 33 years. They have one surviving son. Debra is the co-founder of Listening Hearts, http://listening-hearts.memory-of.com/About.aspx a non-profit corporation designed to help bereaved mothers. After some turbulent and confusing experiences, her youngest son, Clint, received the dual diagnosis of bipolar disorder and a drug addiction. Their lives changed forever when Clint died on August 6, 2005, at the age of 20 of an accidental overdose and bronchial pneumonia. Debra can be reached through the website she maintains for her son at www.clint-reagan.memory-of.com. Debra was a guest on the radio show “Healing the Grieving Heart” talking about “Getting Through Mother’s Day.” To hear Debra being interviewed on this show by Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley, click on the following link: www.voiceamericapd.com/health/010157/horsley051007.mp3

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