Losing a spouse brings on so much grief. You feel torn apart, depressed, and sometimes unattached from the people around you. Just getting through the day can sometimes be an enormous task in itself. And while dealing with all of this, you now have something else to deal with: the Coronavirus or Covid-19. Believe it or not, this actually is another form of grief.

This disease is a horrible one. It does not discriminate based on age, gender, or social status. And it certainly doesn’t discriminate based on marital status. Most of us are not able to go to work, some have lost their jobs completely and don’t know how they will pay their bills, some have to home-school and educate their children because schools are not open, we have lost our freedom to socialize and be around people, sometimes we can’t get the groceries we are needing because of shortages, and there is a fear of getting the disease itself. All of the losses we are now facing is yet another form of grief. The biggest loss of all is the astounding loss of life we continue to see on a daily basis. It came up soon and without notice for the most part. We were emotionally unprepared. We mourn the losses that come with it.

You as a grieving spouse are now affected by these losses as well. You have a double grief process to endure. This is in no way saying not being able to socialize for a while is equal to losing a spouse. It is not. But it does affect you. You must be extra cautious not to let things bring you down more than you may already be feeling. The emotional toll grief brings can affect you not only emotionally, but physically as well. You don’t want to become physically ill. Listed below are ways to keep yourself going during this pandemic.

Do something productive every day. It doesn’t matter if it’s cleaning out a closet, organizing the cupboards, or writing a poem. At the end of the day you can say that you did something.

Get outdoors if you can. Working in your garden or flowerbeds, mowing the lawn, or walking around the neighborhood will give you fresh air, a change of scenery, sunshine (hopefully), and even exercise.

Communicate with your friends and family. You can communicate with your friends and family on social media, on the telephone, through texts, or old time pen and paper letter writing.

Take part in adult art. Many adults enjoy adult coloring books and activity books such as word searches or Sudoku. It is a form of mental therapy.

Learn a new hobby. You can find educational videos that will teach you new hobbies on places such as You Tube and Udemy.

Limit your amount of news watching. You may want to find out the latest update or hear your local or state officials when they hold a press conference about Covid-19, but refrain from watching it all day long. It will only increase the stress.

Stick to a schedule. Get up, get dressed, be present, and get going on something you want to accomplish for the day.

All of the ideas mentioned will help keep your mind occupied, you will feel productive, and it may lighten the extra emotional burden you are having to carry. This ugly disease will end one day, as will your most painful part of your grief recovery for your spouse. You want to be able to come out on the other side feeling healthy and ready to live life again. Until then, stay safe, take precautions, and wait. Better days are ahead.

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Peggy Bell

Peggy Bell is a retired educator with forty years of teaching experience, as well as an author and bestselling co-author. After retirement, Peggy wanted to do more with her life, while continuing to add value to the lives of others. She became a certified personal development coach. Having been a widow herself and knowing first-hand the pain of losing a spouse, she started an online support group for widows and wrote a book called, Life After Loss for Widows: Lifting the Veil of Grief. Peggy also empowers women who are overcome with self-doubt to discover their inner truths and thrive in life according to their terms. Peggy is a firm believer that it is never too late to go after your dreams. For more information visit www.peggymbell.com.

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