We all dream, though some people say they don’t remember their dreams. Some dreams are pleasant, some are strange, and some are scary. Some are crystal clear, and some are so nebulous that it’s hard to even explain them in words. Some make you wonder what that dream was all about, or if there was any kind of message in there somewhere for you.

 

But what if a dream of your loved one who has passed away is so clear and tangible that you could swear it was really them?

 

I have heard about these kinds of dreams from others and read about them in books. And I have had a few of them myself. Who’s to say if it was really your loved one? In my opinion, if you felt their hug, looked into their eyes, heard them speak, and felt that eternal loving connection, then it was them. So easy for the naysayers to say it was nothing but a dream, but the experiencer is the only one who knows how it felt.

 

Here is my recent dream:

 

I was in a nondescript space, standing, looking straight ahead at what I would describe as fog with a light behind it. I was aware of a table off to my right with a radio on it. The voice from the radio sounded like my 24-year-old son, Eric, who had passed away almost 6 years ago. I said, “Is that you? Is that you?”

 

Still in the dream, I suddenly I felt a strong presence behind me that was undeniably Eric. He had a huge presence, bigger than life. I felt him wrap his arms around me, then place his hands under my armpits and I knew he was going to lift me up, almost like a male dancer would do with a ballerina. I said to him, “If that’s really you, then when you lift me, hold me there up at the top for a little bit.” Immediately he lifted me up and held me there, and I knew it was him. As I remained suspended in the air, the rush of euphoria was immeasurable, the bliss eternal.

 

After a few moments, he gently placed me back on the floor. I turned around to hug him. Even before I put my arms around him, he put his arms around me, and we hugged. I could feel his body. I was so filled with joy to be with him. After that we began to talk about different things, and though I don’t remember the exact conversation, we were together in a place beyond this time and space.

 

I woke up gently, softly, with an unmistakable sense of peace. I didn’t want to move, to let that feeling slip away. I knew that eventually I would have to begin the human realities of the day ahead of me. But I wanted to keep this feeling of Eric with me. The connection was strong. I had just been with him. And in that waking moment, all was well.

 

I have had so many other dreams as well. And I have heard from Eric’s siblings and friends about the time they have spent with Eric in their dreams. I have documented every dream, each one bringing me immense joy and comfort, each one resonating deeply within me, affirming the truth that his love for us continues just as much as our love for him continues.

 

The connection with our loved ones in spirit is eternal. We feel the grief as we miss their physical presence, but knowing they are always with us can bring about hope for a way to continue to live in a way that honors them. By Dolores Cruz

 

 

 

Dolores Cruz

Dolores Cruz is the author of two books. Look Around; A Mother’s Journey from Grief and Despair to Healing and Hope tells about her grief journey and spiritual shift after the sudden death of her 24-year-old son, Eric. Though she at first had no idea how she could live again without her son, her journey eventually brought her to a whole new understanding of the questions we all ask about the meaning of life. Her recent book, A Bird Called Wisdom, is a poetic expression of this same grief and healing journey. In addition to her own two books, Dolores is co-author of Shining Light Parents Speak which shares the stories of 130 parents from the international organization, Helping Parents Heal, which provides support and hope for parents whose children have passed away. She has also written two articles for HuffPost on grief and healing, as well as on the continued connections we have with our loved ones in spirit. Dolores believes grief is not talked about enough and feels strongly about the importance of opening up this conversation through her writings and podcast appearances. Dolores is a retired elementary school teacher who now volunteers as an Affiliate Leader and Caring Listener with Helping Parents Heal. She is a Certified Grief Educator, having trained under David Kessler. She is also a certified Grief Yoga instructor, receiving her training from Paul Denniston. The Cruz Family continues to honor Eric, who was an amazing drummer, by providing a music scholarship in Eric’s name at Neighborhood Music School in Los Angeles. Dolores lives in the LA area along with her husband, Joey, and boxer dog, Brandy. She has three other wonderful adult children who live locally. Aside from writing, she practices yoga, teaches tap dance, is involved in various writing projects, and finds peace and solace spending time outdoors.

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