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Taking Care of Your Health While Grieving

Posted on March 11, 2016 - by Coralease Ruff

The Executive Director of The Compassionate Friends, Alan Pederson, joins the president of the Open to Hope Foundation, Dr. Gloria Horsley, to discuss the importance of health while in the grieving process. Grief is a natural response to loss, but it can be devastating. Special guest Dr. Coralease Ruff is featured, a registered nurse, professor, and international grieving consultant. When grieving, your heart rate can go up and your blood pressure increases. You may have digestive issues, respiratory system problems, heart issues, and your musculoskeletal system can be affected, says Dr. Ruff. Physical symptoms are common, and can be dangerous. […]

Inspirational poem about puzzles by author Laurel D. Rund

Makiko Matsumoto: Grief Support for Children in Japan

Posted on March 10, 2016 - by Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley

At the National Alliance for Grieving Children conference, Dr. Gloria Horsley connects with Makiko Matsumoto from Tokyo, Japan. Last year, she went to The Dougy Center in Portland and decided to start a similar grief support group in Japan. So far, the efforts have been great. However, it’s difficult to communicate with the members and to find children who may benefit. There’s no such thing as “grieving children” in Japan, which makes it difficult to talk about grief and loss. Children may not want to talk about grief because they don’t want to worry their parents. Matsumoto’s goal is to […]

Molly Pickett: Teens and Grief

Posted on March 9, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

Dr. Heidi Horsley discusses teens and grief with Molly Pickett, who works with the Tamarack Grief Resource Center. Pickett began her grief journey at just 12 years old when her father died by suicide. She considers herself fortunate to participate in camps at Tamarack. For her, the biggest help was knowing that she was seen. She had people who were caring and compassionate. Tina Barrett, the manager of Tamarack, saw Pickett in the camps and told her what might be helpful. Pickett’s mother was in her own grief journey, and used silence as a way to cope. Teens need to […]

Carl McDonald: Loss of a Child in a DUI Collision

Posted on March 8, 2016 - by Gloria Horsley

A webinar from The Compassionate Friends, featuring Carl McDonald with the National Law Enforcement Initiatives, focuses on losing a child from an impaired driving incident. The host, Dr. Gloria Horsley, knows exactly what it means to lose a child in a car crash—she lost her son, Scott, when he was only 17 years old. McDonald was a patrol officer in Wyoming when his daughter was killed in a DUI incident. The offender was his ex-wife. The two had divorced because of her drinking, and McDonald was worried about his daughter growing up in that environment. He was awarded full custody, […]

Dr. Kay Fowler: Adult Sibling Loss

Posted on March 6, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

Adult sibling loss is a common disenfranchised loss. Dr. Heidi Horsley interviews Dr. Kay Fowler at an Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) conference. Dr. Fowler is the editor of the ADEC Forum, and she lost three adult sisters in a 15 year period. The deaths of Jenny, Ann, and Mary Grace have largely impacted Dr. Fowler’s life and work. Mary Grace died of a heart attack at 44, and Dr. Fowler just couldn’t process it. There was no language or way to make sense of the situation. She felt invisible, with all the focus on her mother and […]

Dr. Ken Doka: How Women and Men Grieve Differently

Posted on March 5, 2016 - by Ken Doka

It’s no surprise that men and women grieve differently. Dr. Gloria Horsley interviews Dr. Ken Doka, president and consultant to the American Hospice Foundation, at an Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) conference. It’s no longer solely an issue of gender—and “some” men grieve differently than women. There are, instead, many ways of grieving. Intuitive types experience grief in waves of feeling. Both men and women can experience this. Grief can come out in anger and crying, which is an externalization. Talking about grief and dealing with emotions while finding ways to process feelings can be a great help […]

Lynne Ann DeSpelder: Healing Through Art

Posted on March 4, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

A leader in the field of grief and loss, Dr. Lynne Ann DeSpelder talks with Dr. Heidi Horsley about using art to help heal from grief. Dr. DeSpelder is also a professor of psychology, counselor, and author of The Last Dance: Encountering Death and Dying (now in its eighth edition). When someone dies, think about what you used to do before—and what you do now. Often, what you did was pretty normal. Dr. DeSpelder recalls a young mother who lost her baby. Before Justin’s death, she used to make clay artwork and sell it at a boutique. Dr. DeSpelder told […]

Dr. Ira Byock: Nurturing a Relationship During Grief

Posted on March 2, 2016 - by Jessica Tyner Mehta

Professor at Dartmouth Medical School Dr. Ira Byock shares with the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC) four key items to keep in mind in order to maintain a whole relationship. He’s also the Director of Palliative Medicine, and has been involved with hospice care for over 30 years. In emergency medicine and private practice, he created a foundation to work with palliative care now full-time. Keeping your relationships current and complete is critical with end of life care. Think of it like a circle: There’s nothing broken or left undone. “Please forgive me,” “I forgive you,” “Thank you,” […]

Bridget Park: Teens and Sibling Loss

Posted on March 1, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

The Executive Director of the Open to Hope Foundation, Dr. Heidi Horsley, talks to Bridget Park about losing a brother. Sibling loss is often a disenfranchised one. Park recommends leaning on your family and letting others love you and just be there for you. It’s tempting to push people away because you don’t want them to feel sorry for you. Being there for one another is critical. Parents worry when a teen doesn’t talk after losing their sibling. Parents think teens should talk, but Park says in her experience she was trying not to upset her parents. They don’t want […]

Stephanie Groepper: Spouse Loss

Posted on February 29, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

Losing a spouse is unexpected, since you see yourself growing old with this person. Dr. Heidi Horsley talks to Stephanie Groepper, a military widow. She’s a psychology student and the founder of Washington Warrior Widows, a non-profit for widows and widowers in Washington State. Groepper’s daughter is seven years old, and was only four months old when her partner died. In the military, it’s the loss of both a spouse and a lifestyle. As part of the military, it can be a sudden loss of your community. You’re given one year to move off base if you live in military […]