Open to Hope Articles

Articles Home

Laurie Goble-VanDiest: Loss Due to Adoption

Posted on January 22, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

Dr. Heidi Horsley talks with Laurie Goble-VanDiest, the mother of three adopted children. Dr. Horsley adopted one of her children as well. Goble-VanDiest explains that she decided to adopt after she couldn’t conceive. She went the route of foster to adoption and was initially just looking for one child. A three-year-old girl was in her home for six months when it was discovered that the girl’s brothers were also becoming adoptable. The girl had already bonded with the family, and it was important that the siblings stayed together. The instant family happened quickly. Adopted children are born from our hearts. […]

Jim Stewart: Katy’s Kids at CCMe

Posted on January 21, 2016 - by Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi Horsley

Dr. Gloria Horsley talks with Jim Stewart from Katy’s Kids. A bereaved parent himself, Stewart founded Katy’s Kids after his daughter Katy died at ten years old. The Children’s Museum of the East End was born via Katy’s courage, and today Stewart and his wife are constantly looking for ways to give back. They also have a son, who was six when Katy died. They wanted to teach him how to grieve, that it was normal, and to surround him with peers who understand what he’s going through. The Stewarts serve the bereaved around the country, and were inspired by […]

Kristan Glover: Foster Club

Posted on January 20, 2016 - by Heidi Horsley

While at the National Alliance for Grieving Children conference, Dr. Heidi Horsley talked with Kristan Glover from FosterClub. Based in Arizona, Glover is a former foster youth. FosterClub fosters for children in the foster system, and encourages foster kids to never lose hope. There are things you will face that nobody should have to handle, but you can overcome them. She remembers times when she hated herself and hated her life, but knows that it’s up to her to be positive and be happy. For foster youth, there are additional challenges that can make growing up very difficult, and identifying […]

Thank You, Stephen Levine

Posted on January 19, 2016 - by Cheryl Espinosa-Jones

It was intermission at In The Name of Love, a yearly concert in honor and memory of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. Each year, Living Jazz gathers incredible musicians to offer musical tribute and this year, they were all singing Nina Simone. My choir, the Oakland Interfaith Gospel Choir always sings and the night has particular meaning to me because my father spent the most vital years of his career as a civil rights worker. He was on the bridge in Selma, he registered voters and, to his great honor, he was near MLK, behind him on the steps, when […]

Seven Steps to Decuttering Your Grief: The Spark Joy Approach

Posted on January 19, 2016 - by Gloria Horsley

Okay! I did it. I cleaned out my closet this morning. I got rid of all the things that didn’t fully bring me joy. This Christmas my husband gave me the book The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo. It is not a big book, but it is a significant book in that is challenges us to free ourselves of unneeded stuff. Following the author’s instructions I went to my closet took out all my cloths and laid them on my bed. I then proceeded to pick up each item and ask, “Does this spark joy?” If the […]

A Letter to Myself (as a New Widow)

Posted on January 9, 2016 - by Michelle Jarvie

I’ve always been a planner. When I was 8, I had Christmas presents wrapped and cards made in July. When I was 14, I researched all of my college options. When I was 19 and graduated college, I knew that 26 was going to be the best year of my life. After all, at 26, you’re deep into a career, are likely married, own your own home, and are financially stable and wise enough to provide for kids. When the plan sped up and I found and married my best friend at 22 years old, we decided to live in […]

Three Years After Son’s Death, the Emptiness is Sacred

Posted on January 8, 2016 - by Elizabeth Brady

“It is your season, Elizabeth,” our priest greeted me, more than eight months pregnant and my body filled to bursting with our son, John, during Advent 2003. “It is,” I laughed. “I can’t wait to hold him!” Our daughter, Izzy, six at the time, was dubious about a little brother joining her domain in January. We began reading the first chapter of Luke out loud feeling a kinship with Elizabeth, mother of John the Baptist, enjoying the company of her cousin Mary while they were both expecting their sons. And, like their sons, our John, nicknamed “Mack,” came to us […]

Re-Imagining Grief: When Family and Culture Offer No Help

Posted on January 7, 2016 - by Mark Liebenow

We are taught how to grieve by the legacy carried in our families, or more accurately, we are taught how to cover death up. This presented a problem when my wife Evelyn died. I was told that one side of my family was pushed out of Scotland because of the Clearances, settled in Ireland for a time, and then came to America. I was told that the other side fled Germany in the late 1800s when Bismarck was conscripting males for another of his wars, began life in a new country, and created a farm on a prairie in Wisconsin. […]

You Did The Best You Could

Posted on January 5, 2016 - by Nina Impala

There is something very important I want to share with you, so listen deep. As a bereavement counselor I speak with numerous people on a daily basis about loss. The number one thing I feel from people is guilt. The words pour out of them, “If I hadn’t take them to the hospital…” or “What if I hadn’t put him in a nursing home?” “I should have called her more.” Let me tell you something: In those moments when you made the decisions to do or say what you did, you were reacting from that moment and the love in […]

Hope and Clarity in the Middle of Nowhere

Posted on January 5, 2016 - by David Roberts

Lately, I have begun to revisit previous articles and blogs that I have authored. Perhaps as I grow older, I value nostalgia more, or perhaps it is the value I place on the past as a teacher. Regardless, I always discover new insights when I revisit previous writings. The majority of the content of the article that follows was originally published by Hello Grief in November of 2013. I have eliminated or changed some words here because the terminology I used then to describe my path doesn’t apply to me in this moment. I believe that as we evolve after loss, how we conceptualize […]