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An Open Letter to Whitney Houston’s Family

Posted on April 5, 2012 - by Art & Allison Daily

Growing up I listened to Whitney Houston’s music, pretending I was her as I belted out “I Will Always Love You.” I think I saw the movie ‘The Bodyguard’ a total of ten times, watching it again just after she died. As someone who counsels others when a loved one dies, I thought of her family and her daughter often in the days and weeks following her death. I wondered how they were coping, having their grief and Whitney’s death become such a spectacle. I began to think of what I would say to them, if I could..and I wrote […]

Stumbling Blocks or Stepping Stones

Posted on April 4, 2012 - by Deb Kosmer

When someone we love deeply dies, many of us feel as though we have lost our way and very unsure of where the path is, let alone what path we are on. Many of us planned on stopping and getting off anywhere but here. When we are headed towards heartbreak, any direction can seem better than the one we are on. Somehow though here we are and there is no turn around or turning back. We are on a one-way road that we never chose. The date our journeys started, the length of time it took, may have been moments, […]

As Career Shifts, Counselor Remembers What Really Matters

Posted on April 3, 2012 - by David Roberts

I have been an addictions counselor for 27 years, and have worked in the same place for that entire time. I will be retiring from my full-time job on July 12th of this year. I haven’t officially filed the paperwork yet, but that will be a formality. I am prepared to close this chapter of my life and not look back. I will miss many of the staff that I have met over the years, and the day-to-day contacts with the patients. I am retiring mainly because I don’t share the work system’s values and priorities anymore, and I can’t […]

Signs and Connections: Happiness Returns

Posted on April 2, 2012 - by Debra Reagan

My younger sister and I have resided in the same area most of our lives. We have maintained a close connection despite the fact that we’re frequently in different phases in our lives. We normally speak often and participate in each other’s life activities. Then the day came when my sister had the opportunity to move to the Grand Canyon. While living on the rim can be very exciting, it can also pose some problems. Sometimes, the cell phone reception can be challenging. That, added to the simple logistics of moving and then settling into a new life, made the […]

Why Grief is NOT a Mental Illness

Posted on April 1, 2012 - by Suzy Yehl Marta

Recently, it was announced that the American Psychiatric Association is currently revising the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), a tool used by clinicians to diagnose patients. Shockingly, they’ve added grief as a treatable disease as part of the proposed changes. Put simply, grief is not a clinical illness that can be “treated” but rather the normal, natural way in which people respond when they lose someone or something that is of deep value to them. This topic will be widely covered in the coming months and has already garnered attention from the New York Times and other […]

Writing It Forward After Husband’s Early Death

Posted on March 31, 2012 - by Laura B. Hayden

Thirteen years ago, I read a letter to an editor urging young widows to go for annual physicals. The timing of the piece reminded me of when I first read about the Heimlich Maneuver in 1974, just days after my grandfather choked to death on a bite of meat. My uncle had rushed to Grandpa’s aid, pounding on his back to dislodge the piece of meat – all to no avail. If he had known enough to wrap his arms just above Grandpa’s waist, and pull into his gut, the morsel would have popped out and my grandfather would have […]

Grief and the Strengths Perspective

Posted on March 30, 2012 - by David Roberts

As I draw nearer to retirement from state service, the memories about the colleagues whose association I have valued and the patients who have crossed my path during the past 27 years have increased in frequency. I have also begun to reflect on the damage that well-meaning human service professionals can do to clients who are in the early stages of trauma simply through the interventions that they use. Since my daughter Jeannine’s death on 3/1/03 at the age of 18, I have become more sensitive to the interventions used with grieving clients that may unintentionally undermine as oppose to […]

Springtime in the Heart Can Happen After Pregnancy Loss

Posted on March 29, 2012 - by Art & Allison Daily

It’s been unseasonably warm in the Rocky Mountains lately. We have an early and warm spring and I am not complaining one bit! I live for the sun’s warmth on my pale skin and the joy I feel when flowers begin popping out of the ground. I feel reborn, which of course is what spring is all about. In the last two weeks, two mothers have lost their babies at 16 weeks of pregnancy. I have been there as their counselor to help them birth their baby (after a certain stage of pregnancy, mothers must birth the baby), and to […]

Where is My Child and Is He Okay?

Posted on March 28, 2012 - by Sheri Perl

From the moment you become a parent, there are two questions that become first and foremost in your mind: Where is my child and is he or she okay? Even when you are dealing with an infant that seldom leaves your side, you still get those moments. I can remember watching my babies when they were in deep sleeps to make sure that they were still breathing. Whenever I left them with a babysitter or at nursery school, throughout the time that I was separated from them, I would wonder where they were and if they were okay. I simply […]

Pet Cremation Mistake: Breaking the Bad News

Posted on March 27, 2012 - by Marty Tousley

Question from a reader: I wonder if you could give me some advice. Recently our pet cat died and we decided to have her cremated so the ashes could be scattered in our garden. I have just learned from our vet who sent the cat to the crematorium that accidently our cat was not labeled and was mass-cremated. It now leaves me with a dilemma as I know my partner will be distraught about this. Should I get another set of ashes (which my vet says they can supply) or should I tell her the truth? I honestly don’t know […]