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Grief Has Its Own Timetable

Posted on April 20, 2011 - by Mary Jane Hurley Brant

After the death of someone we love, our grief experience and overall healing has everything to do with our relationship to the deceased, the intensity and depth of the love we felt for them, and our degree of faith in a hereafter. In the immediate aftermath of a person’s death, it’s hard to breathe and everything hurts. We feel shattered, bewildered and frightened. Sometimes, however, grief shows us its own timetable and can be delayed or complicated. I experienced a long delay in time sequence when my father died. I was thirteen years old; it was the springtime of my […]

Soul Pain, Grief and Transformation

Posted on April 19, 2011 - by Jane Simington

Between tearful sobs, Mary confides the painful story of how her life has become meaningless and of how parenting issues and marital problems have escalated since the suicide death of her teenage son, four years before. Listening to her as she speaks — bent-over, eyes averted, monotone voice — one can conclude that Mary is depressed, the type that results in reaction to a major loss. Yet as a seasoned therapist, I need to delve deeper, for I have learned that depression is not a true diagnosis; it is a collection of symptoms, all alerting a keen observer to a […]

Running From Pain Doesn’t Work

Posted on April 18, 2011 - by Louise Lagerman

I tried to run away from you. I did. I thought that if I ran fast, I would be able to escape the pain I feel over losing you. It worked for a little while. Maybe a month or two. But how can you run away from this kind of love, from this kind of longing? I realize now that it doesn’t work to run away from you and deny that you were and still are such a huge part of my life. It only causes more pain. So I need to embrace my loss and, yes, even embrace the pain. Doing […]

my son patrick

Posted on April 17, 2011 - by admin

i lost my son patrick 7 months ago .he was 8 years old .he died in an abandon house fire . he died september 17,2010 . that was the worsed day of my life . ive been trying to deal with his death but it seems like my crying everyday never stops .

Butterflies Offers Sign from Beyond

Posted on April 17, 2011 - by Kimberly Wencl

We buried our 20-year old daughter, Elizabeth, on a bright, sunny, warm September day. If only that sun would break through the shock and disbelief of what that day brought. Why God, why? Elizabeth was supposed to bury me. A parent should never have to bury a child. A year earlier, we had packed her up and taken her to her dream college, the University of Minnesota. We had never seen her so happy. She was living in an exciting metropolitan area, she was getting good grades and she was making many diverse friends … all goals she had set […]

Grief Support Group Didn’t Help – Now What?

Posted on April 16, 2011 - by Marty Tousley

Question from a reader: I feel very comfortable on the online forum I’ve joined and have already received great support from the people there. They encourage and inspire me. I’m learning a lot from those who’ve inhabited this world of grief longer than I have. That’s why it would be good to hear your thoughts on the following issue. The forum helps me, but I feel I need additional counseling. I met individually with a grief counselor from the hospice where my husband died and she encouraged me to come to one of their local support group meetings. I went, […]

Falling in Love Again after Pet-Loss

Posted on April 15, 2011 - by Bonnie Goodman

My beloved first golden retriever died in July 2005, The anticipated and then excruciating pain of his loss lingered for months on end, tears flowed uncontrollably and a growing yearning for that furry connection permeated my soul. I swore to never get another dog again, as I couldn’t tolerate yet another heart wrenching “letting go.” But, a nagging question lingered: Could I continue my life without a dog? This was a terrible dilemma, as I felt a nagging emptiness without a dog to nurture. Yet the void grew wider with each passing day and my desire never ceased, I was […]

Prayer Registry Builds Hope and Community

Posted on April 15, 2011 - by Sheri Perl

My son Danny passed on July 1, 2008, from an overdose of alcohol and prescription drugs. He was 22 years old, a beautiful mountain of a kid with his whole life ahead of him, gone in an instant due to an error in judgment. The day after he passed, while lying in bed not knowing what to do with myself, I sent out a mass email to everyone in my email address book, stating briefly that my son Dan had passed of an overdose and I asked everyone to please send him a prayer. It was kind of an instinctual […]

Grounding Techniques to Deal with Panic Attacks

Posted on April 14, 2011 - by Kim Go

DISCLOSURE: I am not a therapist or trained medical professional. If your want to use this technique, you can consult with your expert therapist or doctor. Most average people can address an impending panic attack with tools and knowledge to reduce the likelihood of slipping into a state of panic, flashback or dissociation. I want to introduce you to a “grounding technique.” The idea behind a grounding technique: As the name implies, “grounding” is a way to “ground” you in the present moment. In doing so, you can retain your connection with the present moment and environment. General Instructions: You […]

We Can’t Get Through Grief with Logic

Posted on April 13, 2011 - by Vicky Bates

Time heals what reason cannot. — Seneca We think in terms of time and much is said about it after a loss. “He was so young to run out of time.” “Her time was up way to soon.” “He was with them such a short time.” People ask how much time does it take for the pain to be over? When will it ease? How long does it take to feel normal again? This is the thing about death, the nut of the nut, as a poet once wrote. You will never get over the loss of a child with […]