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How Can Daughter Help Dad After Painful Loss?

Posted on April 6, 2009 - by Neil Chethik

Melissa writes in: My brother, Michael, died yesterday of a heroin overdose. He was 40 years old. The grief I feel is a fraction of what my parents are experiencing. I was detatched from my brother for years because I could not be around him because he was often under the influence of drugs. I grieve for his loss of life, but the pain I feel from watching my parents grieve for loss of a child seems equally as painful. He died in my parents’ home, where he had lived for 3 years after the consequences of his addiction took […]

Film Review: The Sweet Hereafter

Posted on April 5, 2009 - by Fran Dorf

By Fran Dorf — This somber, difficult film directed by Atom Egoyan, based on the 1991 novel by Russell Banks, is set in a small town in the aftermath of a school bus accident that has killed most of the town’s children. Into this devastating scene descends a slick, big city, ambulance-chasing lawyer, played by Ian Holmes. He is a man pursued by the demons of losing his own daughter to drugs, and he visits each of the victims’ parents to stir up their anger and coax them to participate in a class action lawsuit to profit fr om the […]

Multiple Losses: When the Tears of Grief Return

Posted on April 4, 2009 - by Harriet Hodgson

By Harriet Hodgson — Recovering from multiple losses takes time, grief work, and years of self-examination. You do not recover from multiple losses, you learn to live with them. The process requires acceptance, reconciliation, and the creation of a new life. I have lived all of these things. In February of 2007, my daughter died from the injuries she received in a car crash. Two days later, on the same weekend, my father-in-law succumbed to pneumonia. The deaths stunned me. I was still stunned eight weeks later when my brother died of cancer. Then, nine months later, my former son-in-law […]

The Importance of ‘Acknowledging’ Those Who are Grieving

Posted on April 3, 2009 - by Patrick T. Malone

By Patrick T. Malone — “No one is listening to me!” This is one of the most common complaints you will hear from bereaved individuals. It occurred to me that what they are really saying is simply, “Acknowledge me.” The following excerpt from our new book, Cracking the Code to Leadership, may help you listen and acknowledge more effectively. 100% Attention Giving someone your 100% attention means you listen carefully enough to determine the other person’s point of view. You both listen to what the person says and watch how he or she says it. You also suspend all other […]

Father’s Photographs Show ‘Signs’ of Lost Son

Posted on April 2, 2009 - by Guy Dusseault

By Guy Dusseault — Our story begins on June 27, 2004, a beautiful Sunday morning. At around 10:00 am, our lives changed forever. We received the most devastating news any parent could ever receive, that one of our children had died. Our son Billy was killed when the ATV he was riding at night hit a tree. For the next eight months, we just tried to survive the next day, and I began attempting to make contact with Billy. It seemed like a natural next step. I had to find a way to connect with Billy. I had no idea […]

Does Caregiving Stress Your Marriage? Grow Closer in Your Caregiving Years

Posted on April 1, 2009 - by Carol O'Dell

Is caregiving hard on a marriage? It can be. But it can also be a wake-up call. Sometimes our marriage can be defined by what we’ve survived. Yes, caregiving was stressul on marriage–at times. I wrote in my book, Mothering Mother that I felt like I was a giant ice cream milkshake and each of my family member had a straw–and they were all sucking on that straw trying to get more of me. At times, one would pick up the glass and tap the side, or another would dig deep with the spoon trying to get the last drop. […]

Preparation for Life

Posted on April 1, 2009 - by Eric Tomei

You know when I was growing up living with my Dad was not the easiest experience in the world. He was a strict disciplinarian and he didn’t put with any crap from me or my two sisters. He was serious, introverted, and analytical. Those who know me best would know that I am none of those things. I always thought to myself, “Gosh it would be great if my Dad was my friend or my buddy. We could do things together, hang out, talk about ‘guy stuff’. It would be great.” And you […]

Writing to Heal: A Personal Journey

Posted on April 1, 2009 - by admin

By Linda C. Wisniewski, M.S.L.S. — Take a walk through any bookstore, and you’ll see that memoirs are among the most popular books being sold today. People from all walks of life are putting their stories together for their families, friends and for publication. We love to read real-life inspirational stories. But did you know there are very tangible health benefits to writing? In the 1990s, Dr. James Pennebaker at the University of Texas at Austin found that people who wrote about emotionally traumatic events showed reductions in blood pressure and heart rate and improvement in conditions like asthma and […]

Reminiscing…

Posted on March 31, 2009 - by Sandy Fox

by Sandy Fox What would my life have been like if my daughter were alive today? I often think of that question and ponder on the answers. I envision all sorts of scenarios. Marcy and her husband would be giving lots of parties. They were both involved in the Hollywood scene and were meeting lots of new people in 1994 when she died. Marcy knew how much I liked Barry Manilow, so back in 1992 when she found out that as part of her job, she was in charge of a reception he was singing at, she invited me to […]

Caregivers: Be Gentle With Yourselves

Posted on March 31, 2009 - by Karla Wheeler

By Karla Wheeler When someone we love is terminally ill, it can be the most challenging time in our lives physically, emotionally, socially, and even spiritually. But if we can learn to be gentle with ourselves, newfound energy awaits us on all levels. GO GENTLY. GO GENTLY. This became my mantra, the phrase that kept running through my brain when my 54-year-old husband of 30 years was dying of cancer. I’d be stuck in traffic, late for an important doctor’s appointment about Gerry’s latest x-rays or CT scans. My heart would pound as I willed the stoplight to turn green, […]