Why is Mom (or Dad or my spouse) So Grumpy? 5 Ways to Stop Negativity

Posted on April 23, 2008 - by Carol O'Dell

Is your parent or spouse negative all or most of the time?

How Do I Help My Twin Sister?

Posted on April 21, 2008 - by Ken Doka

Dear Dr. Gloria,
I am hopeful you can offer some thoughts on our situation. My twin sister went through a divorce in 2006. In March of 2007, our father fell ill and my sister and her youngest son, Cody, 13, moved in with him to take care of him.

The Four Cycles of Caregiving: Where Are You?

Posted on April 18, 2008 - by Carol O'Dell

Statistics show that people spend about 4.5 years caregiving.
The average person with Alzheimer’s lives 5-8 years. That means there’s some time they might not be receiivng care–the early years before they’ve been diagnosed when they’re able to cover it up, make excuses, or their family members are just?too inundated with work and children to […]

Poem: To My Natasha

Posted on April 16, 2008 - by admin

?To My Natasha,
Every tear I shed, I shed for you my angel.
The more tears I shed means the more I loved you,
so with out my tears I am nothing ,
My pain is also my love for you,
so how can I wish it away,
Without pain there would have been no love,
My pain is so deep I […]

Why I Chose Against a Feeding Tube

Posted on April 15, 2008 - by Carol O'Dell

After all the caregiving, all the hospital stays, doctor visits, baths, pills, and exhaustion, you have one more hurdle–the dying process itself. One of the toughest decisions you’ll have to make is whether or not to insert a feeding tube.
This occurs when you’re at your lowest. Beyond exhausted. Numb.
You call hospice and more decisions need […]

No Get Up and Go? 5 Caregiving Energy Zappers

Posted on April 11, 2008 - by Carol O'Dell

One of the biggest issues I had as a caregiver was no energy!
I knew I was doing a lot, caring for my mom (She had Parkinson’s and Alzheimer’s and lived?with us) ?and raising three daughters, but I still felt like most of my work was at home, not terribly hard or fast-paced,?so why did […]

What’s Your Dirty Little Vice? Not So Great Caregiving Coping Skills

Posted on April 9, 2008 - by Carol O'Dell

?So what’s your dirty little caregiving vice??
Everyone has them and caregivers are no exception.
?
Caregivers are under enormous amounts of stress, so it’s only natural to turn to something that’s comforting.?The other danger is that caregivers spend an enormous amount of time at home and alone–a breeding ground for vices.
?
I’m all for comfort, but […]

Another Season and the Yellow Butterfly

Posted on April 1, 2008 - by Abel Keogh

April 22, 2004, my life was forever changed. My 14 year old daughter, Olivia Corinne Hoff passed away. It will be four years April 22, 2008.

As I look back now, I don’t even know how I survived. I didn’t think it was possible to live another day, another week, another month and another year, but I have. My grief journey continues to this day, such hard work, every day. For those parents who have lost a child, you all know too well how difficult this journey is. Along the way, I felt as though I were stuck, unable to move forward and, of course, not wanting to. By moving forward, I felt that I would be leaving Olivia behind, accepting life without her. I have moved on but in a different way. I will always have a broken heart, my life is not filled with joy, nor do I look forward to the future. It’s too hard to look beyond today.

In Memory of Carrie

Posted on March 3, 2008 - by admin

Dear Dr. Gloria and Dr. Heidi, It was a beautiful morning. I started the day off like I usually do on a Saturday. First thing I call my parents, as they are 6 hours ahead of us in Scotland. I chatted like I always do, eager to hear news from the week before. Then after breakfast, I made a cup of hot tea and sat at the computer to do our bills for the week. I had planned to cut grass that day, and my husband Mike, was going to run over to my daughter’s house to pick up an […]

Yoga This Morning

Posted on February 6, 2008 - by admin

I am still struggling this morning to shake the reality of the world.  The morning’s unscripted and unexpected comments from innocent bystanders shake my wobbly legs on this chillier February morning as I am undressing for yoga class….it is not even 7 AM! As I peel the layers of outerwear off my own body, remove my shoes and start to go into the  cave, next to me is this woman — happy spirit, normal based on appearances — she is smiling broadly. She has no idea my only son is dead. She is one of these faces I see in […]