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What to Look for in a Grief Companion

Posted on November 23, 2020 - by Dr. Beth Hewett

By Beth L. Hewett, PhD, CT When we’re grieving and want support from a grief companion, it’s important to choose helpers who understand grief, purposeful mourning, soulful and spiritual work, and grief facilitation. The following are a few things to consider when seeking such support. Guidance They can walk with us but not carry us or tell us where and how to go about our mourning work. They can make us aware of potholes in the road, and if we fall into the holes anyway, they can help us get back out to begin journeying again. They can host light […]

Navigating 5 Life Changes: Overview

Posted on November 23, 2020 - by Mary Lou Meddaugh

This is an excerpt from “Navigating 5 Life Changes,” An Odyssey of Resiliency and Hope” which is available on my website: https://www.creativecoachingmethods.com/ All Rights Reserved. First Edition. Copyright 2018 by Mary Lou Meddaugh My Odyssey is an inspirational self-help book in a memoir format. It is a personal story of love, loss and renewal through five major life changes and culminates in my coming home to the person I feel I am meant to be – my authentic self. My journey originates with the sudden loss of the love of my life, my husband. Over a period spanning 5 years, […]

The Spiritual Woman Arises From Daughter’s Death

Posted on October 30, 2020 - by Harriet Hodgson

The Spiritual Woman grew from life experience. On a snowy Friday night in February of 2007, my daughter died from the injuries she received in a car crash. Surgeons operated on her for 20 hours, but they were unable to save her life. On Sunday my father-in-law succumbed to pneumonia. His death was expected and, painful as it was, I could accept it. My daughter’s death brought me to my knees. Children are not supposed to die before their parents; it is against the laws of nature. Life is so unfair, I thought, and wondered if I would survive such tragedy. […]

Grieving Dads: Therapists and Other Resources

Posted on October 28, 2020 - by Kelly Farley

This is an excerpt from Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back, which is available at Amazon. A grieving dad must face many hard truths after the death of a child, but for me, perhaps the most sobering one is the fact that I received more help from strangers than I did from people I knew. Maybe that’s why psychiatrists make so much money. After all, many of us are more comfortable talking about our problems to strangers than we are talking to friends or relatives. Alcoholics and gamblers, when you think about it, often find more real help in […]

Grieving Dads: Signs of Concern

Posted on October 26, 2020 - by Kelly Farley

This is an excerpt from Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back, which is available at Amazon. At one point in the middle of the fog that encased me after Noah died, it occurred to me that I was dying right along with him and his big sister, Katie. And you know what? I welcomed the possibility. Although I wasn’t suicidal, by late 2006, I had truly reached rock bottom, and I simply didn’t care whether I lived or died. At this newest, lowest point in my journey through the passing of my children, my body was falling apart and […]

Grieving Dads: When a Child Dies Suddenly

Posted on October 24, 2020 - by Kelly Farley

This is an excerpt from Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back, which is available at Amazon. If it were up to me, I probably would change the “five stages of grief” thing so it included a brand new category. I’d call it “Shock and Trauma,” because those are really the things that hit you first after the death of a child. “Shock,” minus the awe. And “trauma,” minus the blood. Leastwise, trauma minus your own blood. The experts call the first stage of grieving “denial,” and I can promise you that you will indeed experience denial when you go […]

Grieving Dads: The First Blow

Posted on October 22, 2020 - by Kelly Farley

This is an excerpt from Grieving Dads: To the Brink and Back, which is available at Amazon. Fathers aren’t supposed to grieve the same way that mothers do. Society has placed certain demands on men that preclude them from dealing with loss or disappointment by wearing emotion on their sleeves or even talking about it openly. For sure, men aren’t supposed to lose control. They are expected to toughen up, get back to work, take it like a man, and support their wives. And if they must cry, by all means they should do so in private. My own journey […]

Understanding the Reaction of Others

Posted on October 20, 2020 - by Bob Baugher

This is an excerpt from the book: Coping with Grief: A Guide for the Bereaved Survivor by Bob Baugher. You can order it at: www.bobbaugher.com Understanding the Reaction of Others A Feeling That Everyone Else is Carrying on with “Life as Usual” At this time in your life the world looks different: Artificial Frightening Callous Indifferent Cold Insensitive Dreary Lonely Dull Uncaring You may find yourself surprised and hurt that, despite the fact that your life has totally changed, the rest of the world appears to operate just as it always has. Every day you see people going about […]

Targets of Anger during Bereavement

Posted on October 16, 2020 - by Bob Baugher

This is an excerpt from the book: Understanding Anger during Bereavement by Bob Baugher, Carol Hankins & Gary Hankins. You can order it at: www.bobbaugher.com Targets of Anger during Bereavement Oneself When bereaved, one of the easiest targets for anger is oneself. See if any of the following types of self-directed anger relate to you: Not living up to expectations Part of being human is having expectations of yourself. Translated into self-talk, it often includes the words “should,” “must,” “have to,” and “need to.” During bereavement, it can sound like this: “I must be strong, I must do this right, I […]

Understanding Anger During Bereavement

Posted on October 13, 2020 - by Bob Baugher

This is an excerpt from the book: Understanding Anger during Bereavement by Bob Baugher, Carol Hankins & Gary Hankins. You can order it at: www.bobbaugher.com Components of Anger Expression One way to think of anger is in terms of the way it affects our body, mind, social life, and emotional state. Let’s look at each. The Physical Component 1. Verbal expressions • Swear words • Substituted swear words (“shoot, dang, darn, heck, son of a gun, cripes”) • Labeling words (“idiot, stupid, heartless, psycho, chicken, geek, nerd”) • Questions (“who . . . , what . . . , […]