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The Wound Time Won’t Heal

Posted on February 10, 2019 - by Maria Kubitz

Time heals all wounds. We’ve all heard it. Sounds incredibly hopeful for someone who’s drowning in grief. Except when time doesn’t heal your wound. Not enough time. It’s been years since my 4-year-old daughter, Margareta, died. She died exactly 29 days after her fourth birthday. That means we had 1,489 glorious days to spend with her — the only daughter in a family full of boys. One of my grandmothers died at the age of 98. My other grandmother is well into her 90s. Based on those genes, I can probably expect to live until close to a century old. […]

A Daughter, a Mother and an Unexpected Passing: Darkness Followed by a Bright Moment

Posted on February 6, 2019 - by Emily Kil

My wife and I are owners of a company that provides what technically is known as biohazard remediation. We provide cleanup and sanitization services when people are dealing with the aftermath of challenging incidents at their homes. We work with people at some very difficult moments in their lives. Examples of how we help people at grim moments in their lives include: Aftermath of suicide Aftermath of a violent crime Discovery an unattended death A Sunday Morning Phone Call Because of the nature of our business, we are nearly always on call. On a Sunday morning, my family and I […]

Dropping into Memory

Posted on February 4, 2019 - by Mike Russell

Anniversaries come and go but some linger like the drops of rain hanging on the humming bird feeder outside. They don’t want to let go and so they hang on until the weather changes and dries them up or drop from their perch with the force of the wind. Anniversaries are important reminders of the past that are celebrated with the care that should be afforded them. But, they become less celebrated after someone leaves us and remind us what we miss and can not do anything about. When these days come up for me, I sometimes do not even […]

Sometimes Men Need Their Own Sandbox

Posted on February 4, 2019 - by Herb Knoll

Something was wrong. Men who followed the Facebook page, “Widowers Support Network,” just weren’t actively using it as a grief recovery tool. Then, in March of 2018, it hit me. Widowed men who sought out the services of my ministry, the Widowers Support Network wanted to express themselves and the grief they were confronted with following the death of their spouse or life partner, they just didn’t want to do it in front of (or online with) women. Dah! Makes sense to me. After all, few men enroll in grief groups and those who do rarely complete the entire […]

Jason Stout: Heroic Journey, Outward Bound

Posted on February 3, 2019 - by Heidi Horsley

The Executive Director of Open to Hope spoke with Jason Stout of Outward Bound during the 2015 Association of Death and Counseling Conference. When asked about how he got into this field, Stout responded, “I fell in love with the mission.” Personal growth via a challenge is something that everyone faces, including when losing a loved one. Horsley’s personal experience with Outward Bound was life changing, and she sees why Stout has been with the organization for 14 years. At 20, Horsley’s brother and cousin died in a car crash. Unsure of how she could move forward after such a […]

When a Sibling Dies by Suicide

Posted on January 31, 2019 - by Michelle L. Rusk

In the initial months and years after my sister Denise died by suicide (just two weeks before her 18th birthday), I sought out as much information on sibling loss as I could. Denise was my younger sister, the one I shared a room with for 10 years, the one who knew more about me and my goals and dreams than anyone else. When she walked in front of a train near our parents’ suburban Chicago home, I was 21 and working on a journalism degree at Ball State University in Indiana. My goal from first grade on was to be […]

Muriel Williams: Hospice and Donor Organizations in Bermuda

Posted on January 30, 2019 - by Gloria Horsley

Muriel Williams is a Bermuda native who specializes in organ donation, hospice care and bereavement, serving the country of 65,000 residents and many expatriates who have flocked to the country in search of paradise. “We (the country) have one hospital,” says Williams, along with one organization that provides information and education on organ and tissue donation. She has a partnership with a New England-based organization, working together to optimize organ donation between the US and Bermuda. Williams attended the Open to Hope annual conference in 2015 and shared her passion project with Dr. Gloria Horsley. Dr. Horsley asked Williams if […]

Illene Cupit: Grief Camp

Posted on January 25, 2019 - by Gloria Horsley

The President of the Association for Death Education and Counseling (ADEC), Illene Cupit, found time to speak with Open to Hope’s Dr. Gloria Horsley during ADEC’s 2015 conference. Cupit is also at the University of Wisconsin, Green Bay, which she uses to bolster a grief camp for kids. “I started a grief camp at my university ten years ago” because kids who suffer a loss often need “permission” to be a child again, says Cupit. She loved camps herself as a child, and found the perfect opportunity to marry two of her passions. As a professor, Cupit works with college […]

Michelle Ramirez: Spanish

Posted on January 24, 2019 - by John Rampton

Michelle Ramirez es una consular de duelo y ella habló con John Rampton de Open to Hope acerca de los retos que enfrentan los familiares que experimentan duelo por la muerte de un familiar que decidió donar tejidos. Es importante notar que estas familias, después de experimentar su pérdida, pasan por estadios de dolor, duelo, enojo y muchas otras emociones. Ella dice, “es un viaje delicado, pero también especial.” Michelle reconoce que no todas las culturas lidian con el duelo igual y que depende de muchas cosas como estas familias pasan por este viaje. Es necesario entender la cultura, la […]

21-Year-Old Wonders How to Deal With Pain of Mother-Loss

Posted on January 22, 2019 - by Carol O'Dell

Sally from California asks: I lost my mother two months back. I’m 21, the elder child and suddenly feel that my world has been turned upside down. I’m studying away from home and have blocked my grief out completely. But on the days it makes an appearance, the pain is unbearable. Will the pain ever reduce? Carol O’Dell, author of Mothering Mother, responds: Yes, the pain will subside, give it time. Lots of time. But also know that the grief you’re experiencing is absolutely normal. You lost your mom. You shouldn’t have lost your mom so soon. Your grief tells […]