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Articles:
Grief, Loss and a Proven Plan for Peace of Mind
by Lou LaGrand, grief counselor and author Are you in a state of confusion? Have you made the decision that you will get through this loss? Are you confronting your loss and fears? If not, why not? Peace of mind is the ultimate goal of good grief so that one can begin the work of reinvesting in a life in the absence of the physical presence of the deceased. Peace of mind is also an inner strength that has both emotional and biological value of immense proportions. From it flows unexpected joy and a new energy base. But how can […]
Read MorePlaying Hurt
by Carolina Fernandez When we got the call at 2 AM last Saturday, I hopped out of bed with the thought that anyone faced with a ring in the middle of the night would have: “Who in the world would be calling us at this hour?” I looked at caller ID and, not recognizing the number and seeing that it was not Nick, our son away at college some thirteen hours from home I yawned and crawled back into bed, pulling the down covers way up over my head. Forgetting all about that middle-of-the-night-call, I moved through Sunday morning as always: […]
Read MoreHow Do You Grieve For an Ex-Spouse?
By Mel Glazer — My first wife died several weeks ago. We were married almost thirty years, we have four kids and four grandsons, and we were divorced four years ago. Donna was sick for many years, and her body finally gave out. As sad as it was, it was also a relief. As I am fond of saying, The Angel of Death is not always an enemy, and in this case it was true. But as difficult as the last years might have been between us, her death created new and wrenching dilemmas for me and the kids. I […]
Read MoreWriting to Heal: A Personal Journey
By Linda C. Wisniewski, M.S.L.S. — Take a walk through any bookstore, and you’ll see that memoirs are among the most popular books being sold today. People from all walks of life are putting their stories together for their families, friends and for publication. We love to read real-life inspirational stories. But did you know there are very tangible health benefits to writing? In the 1990s, Dr. James Pennebaker at the University of Texas at Austin found that people who wrote about emotionally traumatic events showed reductions in blood pressure and heart rate and improvement in conditions like asthma and […]
Read MoreSurviving the suicide of my child
By Terrye Harris On December 13, 2004, my world shattered into a million pieces. After a 2 year long battle with schizophrenia, my youngest son, Jonathan took his own life at the age of 19. The day Jonathan died, I kept telling myself this is the worst day of my life. Little did I know through the haze of shock that surrounded me,that there would be many more worse days to follow. The first six months, it was all I could do to keep breathing. During this time I believe I could have actually laid down and willed myself to […]
Read MoreShould Mother Give Deceased Daughter’s Clothes to Someone Else?
Question from Mary: I have a friend who lost her daughter at age 10. She now has a step-daughter that age, and my friend is giving her step-daughter her deceased daughter’s toys and other belongings. Is this normal? David Hurley, a contributing writer for Open to Hope, responds: It seems to me that giving her stepdaughter belongings from her deceased daughter is a sign of acceptance for the stepdaughter. Perhaps this mother, like me, has decided that there are no “steps” in her heart. I don’t think there is a “normal” when it comes to activities following the death of […]
Read MoreFather Recalls Son’s Suicide on the 10th Anniversary
By Dick Loehr — You are reading this because you have lost someone to suicide or perhaps you have had suicidal thoughts yourself. I am writing this to tell you about Keith, what I have learned in these 10 years, and what I do for myself in order to keep surviving. When Keith took his life, he was a working adult, located in a city far from us. We weren’t around Keith very much. He was not in treatment for depression, and we had little understanding of depression or other brain disorders. Keith was a high achiever, well-liked by his […]
Read MoreIs Six Months After Husband’s Death Too Soon to Begin Dating?
Question from Mary: I lost my husband after 31 years. He literally dropped dead at work seven and a half months ago. We had been married almost 31 years and he was my soulmate. A few weeks ago, a man who I knew and met once through a social networking site started texting me and emailing me. He is separated and lonely. I look forward to his messages and I can’t help being flattered by his attention. He gives me a purpose to get up in the morning and I feel happier. At the same time, I feel a terrible […]
Read MoreGrief, Guilt, Death, Denial: a different experience for all
by Mel Menzies There is a tendency to assume that, following a bereavement, grief must adhere to a certain pattern to be real. But this is not true. The process of mourning, following the loss of a loved one, is different for everyone, and looking for a set response from someone is a dangerous expectation. My reactions, when I lost my adult daughter, may be quite different to yours in a similar situation. And yours, in turn, may be opposite to someone close to you. It is important to grasp this concept, especially between parents who have lost a child, […]
Read More“Motherland”: Six Women United by Loss
The movie “Motherland” will have its world premiere next month at the South by Southwest Film Festival in Austin, Texas. “Motherland” is a film about six women from diverse backgrounds who come together to take a unique trip: a 17-day intensive pilgrimage to volunteer in rural South Africa. Prior to the journey, the women did not know each other. However they had one thing in common: they had all suffered the death of a child. With grief in their hearts and the willingness to make a difference, this group of women traveled half way around the world to live with […]
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