“I don’t wear hats.”
“I don’t dance.”
“I don’t talk to strangers.”
The first statement about was said by a woman at a conference for counselors, a woman who refused to choose and wear a hat for an exercise being done. The second statement is one many of us have heard and some of us have possibly said.
The last statement I find incredibly sad. I am not sure who said it but there is a saying that goes, “Strangers are just friends we haven’t met yet.” There is another saying that goes, “I need all the friends I can get.” Never is that more true than when we are going through hardship or our world is falling apart.
The death of someone we dearly love is one of those world falling apart times. When we are deep in grief we can be very needy. Even if family and friends want to be helpful, they may not always be able to, when we need kindness and support the most. If our address book is small we may run out of friends to call on long before we run out of grief.
Sometimes grieving people make new connections through support groups or on-line grief sites. Even though each of us is hurting, we are able to reach out to one another. In doing so, we gain feelings of being understood and that the lives of our loved ones continue to matter. That is a precious gift from someone who becomes more than a stranger.
Deb Kosmer © 2011