Open to Hope Articles
Do you want to read stories of others who have been where you are? Are you looking for bereavement help, and advice? Look no further. We offer over 3,000 articles written by our Open to Hope authors.
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What do you write?
February 8, 2012
As many know, writing through my grief and pain after the death of my son Daniel (8/25/92–2/2/97) helped me tremendously. Has writing been a comfort to you? If so, please share here what you write and any other tips for other parents who want to write. Thanks. ~ Alice J. Wisler, Death of a Younger Child Forum Moderator
The Boogie Man Isn’t Real, but Fear Is
February 3, 2012
You can’t see it. You can’t touch it. But the sensation of fear is very real. It is overwhelming and makes us do things that we would not normally do. When our confidence is shaken and we are thrust into a different personal direction, we naturally get a bit scared and unnerved. It is a new territory and we are unsure of what to do and how to act. Unfortunately, life does not come with a manual and we can’t merely thumb through a Table of Contents looking for answers. Grief can make a person feel fearful. The comfort and […]
Accepting What We Cannot Control
February 1, 2012
“Control yourselves!” How many times did my little brother and I hear that from our parents growing up? As we got older, no one expressed those sentiments to us because we had somewhat “learned” as children to control ourselves through parents, schools, jobs and relationships. I think there has to be some sort of balance between powers over one’s self or others. Not that we want utter chaos, but we have become a world of absolutes. It’s funny we start out these pure heavenly spirit babies and end being taught to relate to everything from a sense of control over […]
New Year Offers Opportunities for Healing
January 29, 2012
Since our son’s death 21 years ago, I’ve observed or ignored New Year’s Day in a variety of ways depending on how hopeful I am feeling at the time. It’s probably not so different from anyone else facing the challenge of a loss, but for me, bringing in the new year on the 31st always feels premature. Kevin’s death and transition occurred seven days into the year, barely long enough to remember to write the correct date on a check. I know it seems odd that a date commemorating the end of my son’s life should mark a new year, […]
A Winter’s Day in Grief
January 29, 2012
Today the ground is covered with last week’s snow and the air is a frigid 29 degrees below zero. There is no pretending winter is not here. Admittedly some people thrive in the winter. It is just their time of year. But for many the long winter months take a toll and contribute to feelings of sadness, depression, and irritability. If you happen to be grieving or re-living the death of a loved one that occurred at this time of year some years ago, these feelings can even be multiplied. Many years ago my son, sister, and father died, my […]
Serious Personal Illnesses After the Death of a Child
January 27, 2012
At the time of the death of our child, we think and feel that our world will certainly end and we often want to die and be ‘with our children’. It does not matter if we have a wonderful relationship with a spouse, surviving children, family members, friends or a career; we just want to be with our deceased child. For the first several months and sometimes even years, bereaved parents may have a self death wish and would welcome the diagnosis of a serious or terminal illness. Fortunately, after doing years of grief work, we are able to reinvest […]
On STUGs: Subsequent, Temporary, Upsurges of Grief
January 26, 2012
Have you ever come across a new word that strikes you as so good you wonder why you hadn’t heard of it before? Ive found a new grief word. STUG! Coined by Therese Rando, it just makes total sense and sounds a bit more upbeat than Grief Triggers. I’ve been STUGGED! (Subsequent, Temporary, Upsurge of Grief) STUGS certainly aren’t much fun when they happen. There are the STUGS that we come to expect: anniversary days, birthdays and family celebrations. Then there are the ones that come like a bolt out of the blue. Those intense upsurges of grief that take you […]
