Open to Hope Articles
Do you want to read stories of others who have been where you are? Are you looking for bereavement help, and advice? Look no further. We offer over 3,000 articles written by our Open to Hope authors.
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Renting a Mourner
September 30, 2009
by Harriet Hodgson When there are big jobs to be done — power washing the deck, tilling a garden, painting a house — Americans rent big equipment. The job gets done quickly and the equipment is returned. Recovering from the deaths of four loved ones was a big job and I wished I could rent a mourner, someone to feel pain for me while I pulled myself together. Two loved ones, my daughter and father-in-law, died the same weekend. The losses stunned me. Six weeks later my brother died and I really wished I could rent a mourner. Then, just […]
A Stir in the Heavens: Just Say No to Letting Go
September 29, 2009
Yes, we are shaking up the status quo of grieving in this country. We are the grief stricken, we are the broken hearted, we are the disenchanted, and we are the anguished. We are the bereaved parent; we are the many who are now saying No to letting go. From the Viet Nam war to the Oklahoma bombing, the shootings at Columbine, the 9/11 terrorist attack on New York City, murders in Rwanda, Northern Ireland, South Africa, the wars in Afghanistan, Iran, Iraq, Palestine, Israel, in the countless other countries around the world and on the streets of our cities […]
Father Grieves Deeply for Loss of Only Son
September 29, 2009
James writes in: I just ran into this site tonight as I am still grieving deeply of my son James who died in an ATV accident on July 26, 2009. I am a physician and have seen a lot of death and many corpses and have signed hundreds of death certificates but I just cannot get the vision of my dead son out of my head and find myself overwhelmed with grief on a daily basis. My son was incredibly intelligent and going to college and also working with me part time in my practice and living with me. He […]
Using a Recovery Program vs. Support Groups
September 27, 2009
by Sandy Fox Not everyone agrees that a grief support group is what all bereaved parents need. One psychology counselor, Maurice Turmel, says that support groups are just that; they offer support but no direction. He believes that these parents are simply recycling their pain and not moving forward with their recovery. He believes parents should go through a “proper recovery program” and incorporate a support group within the recovery program, if they chose to do so. In the end, he says, it doesn’t matter what took your child from you. The grieving and healing process you must undergo remains […]
As You’re Grieving: Seven Questions to Ask Yourself
September 22, 2009
Losing four loved ones within a nine-month span made my mind go in all directions. I thought about my childhood, things I wished I could have changed, and a future without my loved ones. Most of all, I worried about my twin grandchildren, who lost both parents in separate car crashes. I also worried about myself and my new role of GRG – grandparent raising grandchildren. Grief worries can take over your life. I didn’t want that to happen to me, so I made a list of questions that pull me back to the moment. My list may help you. […]
Deceased Daughter is Never Far Away
September 21, 2009
Before my daughter Jeannine died in 2003, I was never one to believe in things that I could not see. My version of reality was defined by hard evidence, not by intuition or feel. Jeannine has given me signs of her presence in a variety of different ways since her death. As a result, my new reality has been defined more by what I feel and experience, then hard facts. With that in mind, I would like to describe one of my more memorable experiences following Jeannine’s death. During college spring break in March 2006, my wife Cheri and I […]
Poem: I Dream
September 17, 2009
I Dream Like a ripple in a pond, A whisper in the wind, I dream of how things might have been. Your boyish grin Your manly cleft shaped chin Your chubby cheeks Your soft blue eyes Are dreams of days and weeks gone by. Your first little giggle, Your toes that you wiggled Are memories that whisper now and then. Like a ripple in a pond, A whisper in the wind, I can not help but cling to what you might have been. Watching you take your first step as you eye your favorite toy to get. Would it have been […]
Rituals
September 16, 2009
by Sandy Fox Rituals are part of life. When your child dies, they become even more important. For myself, I have a few rituals I follow to honor and remember my daughter. Today will be one of them. Each time I leave town for more than just a weekend, as I will very soon, I go to the cemetery to see Marcy and clean off her grave. It makes me feel good. No one else cleans it like I do, and I always want it to shine and look good in case others come by to visit and pay their […]
The Antique Iron Bed, a Source of Comfort
September 16, 2009
When my husband and I were first married, we didn’t own any furniture. We lived in furnished apartments for a few years and purchased a home when my husband was a resident at Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota. Residents don’t make much money and our house was furnished with hand-me-downs. My mother and father-in-law gave us an antique, wrought-iron bed to help out. The bed was white and had small, fleur-de-lis decorations. These were nice, but the most unusual part of the bed was the mattress, which had a picture of a bed bug in the middle and the words […]
