Open to Hope Articles
Do you want to read stories of others who have been where you are? Are you looking for bereavement help, and advice? Look no further. We offer over 3,000 articles written by our Open to Hope authors.
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Ghosts of Memory: Integrating Our Loss Through Remembering
October 21, 2009
I recently read a book called: Ghost Rider: Travels on the Healing Road, by Neil Peart. Peart is the lyricist and world renowned drummer for the Canadian rock band, Rush. His daughter Selena, age 19, died on August 10, 1997, as a result of a car accident and his common-law wife, Jackie died on June 20, 1998, of cancer. Peart became a bereaved parent and a young widower in the space of ten months. One year after the death of his daughter, he embarked on a 55,000-mile, fourteen-month journey on his motorcycle across Canada, the United States and Mexico. He […]
Anger a Normal Step in the Grief Process
October 9, 2009
At a recent dinner party, one of my newly-widowed friends complained that another guest wasn’t being nice to her. “He isn’t talking to me. He isn’t asking how I feel now that I lost my husband,” she said. “It makes me mad that he acts as though nothing happened.” Similarly, another newly-widowed friend complained that one group of women she had been close to stopped calling after her husband’s funeral. “It’s been six months and not one of them picked up the phone to call me lately. I’m so angry at them,” she said. “Obviously they don’t even care about how I feel now.” I told both women not […]
A Look At Anger
October 7, 2009
by Mary Zemites Anger. Such an uncomfortable subject for most of us to face and discuss. Anger is viewed as a negative emotion and most of us don’t like to pull it out and publicly examine it. It is important to understand that the emotion of anger is not negative or “bad.” In fact, it is a useful signal that there is a problem aching to be resolved. Only the actions that come from anger are sometimes negative or “bad.” When someone we love dies, we experience an intense, yet unfocused, emotional energy. The whole experience of loss is somewhat […]
How Do I Handle In-Laws After Death of Husband
October 7, 2009
Adrianne writes in: Do you have any audios in your archive that deals with how to handle your in-laws after your husband dies? My husband died 2 years ago from cancer. Prior to his passing, his siblings became angry with him because he set limitations on visits during his battle due to his chemo. They felt they should come and visit with him as much as they wanted. But it wasn’t what my husband wanted. So due to the anger of that situation other things were brought to the surface. By the time my husband was hospitalized he was finished […]
Is Widower Ready for a New Relationship?
September 23, 2009
DKT writes in: I met a man on Match.com. We are in our 50’s. He divorced his first wife after 20 years of marriage. He was married to his second wife for about 5 years before she was killed in a car accident in January 2009, just 9 months ago. We have been on several dates. After we spent a day together at an event, we went to his house. Her shoes were still by the dresser and her lipstick was still on the cabinet in the bathroom. There are photos of her on the refrigerator. We kissed, but that […]
Poems of Healing and Hope
September 21, 2009
Sometimes I forget how powerful poetry can be. Then I find a lovely book like Beloved On the Earth: 150 Poems of Grief and Gratitude, and resolve to read poems more often and share them with others. Brought together by editors Jim Perlman, Deborah Cooper and Mara Hart, this anthology includes work by poets you’ve heard of and ones you’ll be happy to discover. The book takes its title from a line in Raymond Carver’s poem, “Late Fragment.” I was pleased to find the book includes two poems by writers I know personally. The idea for Colorado poet Marj Hahne’s […]
Trying Something New Brings Joy and Life to the Bereaved
September 11, 2009
By Barbara A. Glanz – The following is an excerpt from Barbara’s book What Can I Do? Ideas to Help Those Who Have Experienced Loss: One of the ways we can help people to move on with their lives is to encourage them to do something different than they have ever done before. It may be to sign up for a class or try a new sport or join a new group. As soon as they take this step, as difficult as it is, it represents going forward in a new life. There is a fine line between encouraging and […]
Cleaning the ‘Emotional Closet’ After a Loss
September 9, 2009
We put all kinds of things inside of closets. There are things you expect to find inside this storage space: sweaters, dresses, and shoes. Then there are the other things that you can’t find a place for somewhere else in the house: old yearbooks, memory boxes, or last year’s tax returns. Perhaps there are mothballs, spider webs, or the odd price tag dropped from a purchased item. Closets are useful partly because you can shut the doors to conceal any messiness that might be found inside. I suppose that is why we use the concept of closets when describing emotional […]
A Meditation for Those Facing the First Anniversary of a Loss
September 6, 2009
As you approach the first anniversary of losing the amazing person that shared your life, I have a vision I would like to share with you. I am imagining you wearing a heavily laden backpack. This pack is filled with the searing pain of separation, the desperate fear of the unknown, the intense longing for the touch of someone who loves you, the emerging hope you have for the future, and a new love for today. You are surrounded by the beauty of the Arizona countryside, heading up the North side of the Grand Canyon. The landscape is breath-taking, sometimes […]
