On December 1st 2010, my life changed suddenly. All I can remember is my dad calling crying saying Ty was in a tragic car accident and we didnt know what was going to happen. 30 minutes later he was gone…I couldnt say I love you one more time, no more hugs, no more promises, no more future hopes for such a young and promising person. How does someone live normally again when the future is no longer what it was supposed to be?
Tags: bereavement, coping with grief, grief, sibling loss
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Oh Chaya, I am so so sorry for the tragic loss of your brother. My heart goes out to you. I lost my sister 16 months ago today in a tragic way so I can relate to your feelings.
You ask how can one live normally again…you find a new normal. I think about Sandy every day. I miss her more every day. I go through each day, knowing she is a part of me and lives on through me.
Give yourself lots of time. Be kind to yourself. You are embarking on a journey that will take you to feelings and emotions you may not know existed.
Please, please, email me anytime.
Shirley
Hi Chaya,
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. The way I like to think about it is that over time my coping mechanisms improve. I lost my mother five years ago. I’ve also found that talking to other people who have experienced loss. Knowing everyone has their own way of coping, knowing there is no right or wrong way to grieve and knowing there are people who have thought the same things as me are all things I find hopeful.
My offer is the same as Shirley’s, please email me any time.
Thank you Shirley and Lauren. I am trying so hard to be strong for my mom and dad but there are days when I just break down. Those days scare me because all the joy and hope disappear in my life. The days I want to text and call to check on him are really hard to deal with as well. I know this will be a life long process and all advice and tips to help I greatly appreciate.